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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23536510">A Collision of Worlds</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fun2beme1/pseuds/Fun2beme1'>Fun2beme1</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Completed, F/M, Language, Mild Sexual Content, Minor Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:39:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>41,026</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23536510</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fun2beme1/pseuds/Fun2beme1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A mysterious portal opens, dropping a huge problem into Captain Levi's lap.  Will his new headstrong, brat of a "roommate" prove more than he can handle?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Levi Ackerman/ Oc</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. A Collision of World Pt. 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>All around me are flashing lights, and a loud vacuum like noise. I find myself and my Camaro heading straight for a horde of titans. Thankful that my car is equipped to battle titans, I vaporize one with a missle, then harpoon the rest of their napes and drag them to their death. Relieved that was taken care of so quickly, I screech to a halt, throwing up a fan of dirt as I brake. Ahead is a group of people on horseback watching in awe as I halt in front of them. 'Who the fuck? Where did they come from?' As I get out, I hear one of these unknown individuals order the others back from this demon and leaves a long scratch on my car with his sword. The asshole also breaks my headlight. Forget playing nice.</p><p>"Asshole!" I scream, walking rapidly to get into his face, "Ever touch my car again I will fucking kill you!" I shove him, and he shoves me back. Up in each others faces and staring at each other threateningly, we are about to continue our shoving match when a blonde gentleman with an air of authority pushes us apart.</p><p>"ENOUGH! Until we can figure out what to do with her, she is your responsibility and does not leave your sight!". To me he replies, "This is dangerous territory, I highly recommend you allow us to give you shelter, and I must confess my curiosity towards your method of titan killing. Please, know that we mean you no harm, but cannot allow this opportunity to pass. You will accompany Captain levi everywhere. Your alternative is the garrison prison."</p><p>I turn to look at the Captain. "Everywhere? You mean to tell me I have to sit in the bathroom with him for hours while he tries to find his tiny dick?" Levi's scowl deepens, and I put my face directly into his. "I can't help you there, I don't have tweezers THAT small". Furious, he turns to his Commander.</p><p>"Commander Erwin" he says, "I feel this is a huge mistake." Erwin brushes off the comment and instead addresses a brown haired girl with thick glasses.</p><p>"Hanji, find a way to get this metal contraption out of sight of the walls, and make it quick."</p><p>"Yes sir!" she exclaims looking very excited at the prospect.</p><p>"One more fucking scratch on my car...just one.." I comment as she walks past.</p><p>"You. Get on." I turn to look at the Captain, and find he is on his horse waiting for me. "Are you deaf, or are you stupid? Get. On. Don't make me come down there and collect you."</p><p>"You're a piece of shit", I say and climb up behind him.</p><p>"Hold on." Ignoring him, I place my hands on the horses hindquarters instead to keep myself steadied. We soon come to the gates of what I assume is a large city. 'Oh my, what is this? Their manner of dress, the buildings, horse drawn carriages? Where AM I?' We stop immediately upon reaching the stables outside a large building with two wings which extend off the main entrance. As he's rubbing down his horse I think maybe he is distracted enough that I might be able to run and get myself lost in the crowd. I barely take a step when lightning quick, he grabs my arm and yanks me up against the wall. He presses himself up against me so close I can feel his heartbeat. "Listen up. Even if you were to succeed in getting away, where is that hunk of metal garbage? Do you think you could find it before I find you?" We are exactly the same height, and the eyes that are staring directly into mine are cold and emotionless.</p><p>'He's right', I think to myself. 'and even if i did find my car, how long would my gas last? I don't even know where I am.' I lift my head defiantly, matching his cold stare. "Fine. I'll trust my car to your Hanji, and I will accompany you. You however, will keep your hands off me."</p><p>He grabs me closer, and painfully. "Listen you stupid bitch. If you'd rather then I'd gladly hand you over to the drunken perverts in the military police. They can lock you up and do whatever they want to you, I don't give a shit. However, I've been given my orders and I intend to follow them." I begin to argue, but he cuts me off. "Make your choice."</p><p>"Get off of me."</p><p>He smirks. "Whatever you're afraid I might do to you, please be reassured I don't want 'that' from 'you'."</p><p>"I'm not afraid of you. and as far as 'that' goes don't worry. The feeling is mutual."</p><p>He snarls in frustration, grabbing me by the shirt and throwing me forward. I stumble, but manage to keep my balance. "Move." We continue on in silence, which is only broken by the occasional direction stated in his cold voice. Finally he tells me to stop, unlocks the door and ushers me into a sparsely furnished room. The most ornate thing in the whole room is a mahogany desk with stacks upon stacks of paperwork on it. He shoves me onto the couch. "Stay there until I can figure what the fuck to do with you." He sits behind his desk, runs his fingers through his hair and begins going through the paperwork on his desk. He looks up at me after awhile, noting me looking out the window. Continuing to watch me, he takes in the long blonde hair, soft eyes looking longingly out his window, the shape of my body and the very revealing top.... 'Do they not have decent clothing where she comes from? Tch. Distracting.' annoyed, he rolls his eyes and continues writing. A moment later, there is a knock on the door. "Enter."</p><p>Commander Erwin comes in, looks at me, nods and addresses Levi. "We need to discuss this new development. Hanji is down waiting for us in her lab."</p><p>"What do I do with that?", Levi says as I glare daggers at him. Erwin turns to me.</p><p>"Ma'am, I apologize that I had never inquired as to your name."</p><p>"Heather."</p><p>"Heather...?", he prompts.</p><p>"Just Heather. And may I add I have NEVER been treated so disrespectfully in my life. Your subordinate here clearly lacks your social graces." I can see Levi's face reddening in anger, and so does Erwin.</p><p>He shoots Levi a warning glance and replies "I sincerely apologize for anything Levi may have said or done, but I assure you he is the only one I'm completely confident can keep you safe from any dealings with the military police." Erwin turns his attention then to Levi. "Now, Levi. Please escort the lady RESPECTFULLY to the mess hall."</p><p>"Lady my ass..." He grumbles, shooting one more annoyed glance at my chest. He then sends me down to the mess hall, where he tells me to "Clean this fucking dump.", and leaves to join Erwin and Hanji.</p><p>Levi's Journal: What a fucking bitch! If Erwin and Hanji weren't backing her, she'd probably be in a ditch somewhere as far as I'm concerned. Her and her ridiculous metal weapon. We were in the middle of a mission. She could have killed us with her explosives. Is her brain the size of potato girls? God. And now she's my problem. Like I need more problems. I already have the new recruits to deal with, and now this bitch. It seems like she's got the whole scouting legion up her asshole. Hanji's thinking of setting up a space for that piece of shit "car". We barely have enough rations for food and cleaning supplies. How the hell are we going to set up a fucking house for that stupid shit machine? If shitty glasses thinks she is going to make me pick up animal shit to fuel this car she's going to be sorely mistaken with another foot up her ass. MINE.</p><p>Heather's Journal: What kind of backwards shit show did I end up in? What is this, the 14th century? I'm lost, I don't know how I'm going to get back and how do I get treated? First off this tiny dick bastard attacks my car with his fucking sword. He's lucky I didn't kill him on the spot. If I had my gun on me he would have been nothing but a fucking grease stain on the ground. He's lucky his superior held me back, but now for some reason I'm being told that I'm HIS responsibility! Don't I get a say in this? Why him? And why should I have to follow any of them around like a damn puppy? Not to mention there's something wrong with my car, so now I'm pretty much stuck and I'm going to need fuel. I have to rely on this Hanji person to help me figure out some compatible fuel source. Maybe we should use Levi shit to fuel my car. Heck, that alone could fuel an entire city. It's an inexhaustible resource, he just opens his mouth and crap falls right out. Oh do I hate this man! Everything he says is like a mind sucking toxic waste event!</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Levi vs. Heather (Who's on top)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>'That bitch. How can she possibly know all that? What the fuck? What am I? An open book to her? No. She doesn't know me. And what did she mean, her old life is over?'...</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"So, where are you from?" asks a brown haired girl, who I remember from my arrival. "I'm Sasha by the way."</p><p>"Heather, and apparently a whole different world than here."</p><p>She looks at me curiously, puzzled by my answer. "You'll get used to being here, I'm sure."</p><p>"I sincerely hope I'm not here long enough for that." I state, while scrubbing furiously at a spot on the floor in front of me.</p><p>"Well anyway, you made quite an impression on us cadets. Nobody stands up to the Captain like that, and I mean NOBODY...except maybe Hanji.... but no one's witnessed it."</p><p>"Yeah. He's a real piece of work", I mutter continuing to clean.</p><p>"He grows on you.."</p><p>"Like a fungus."</p><p>"Look.", Sasha says standing up, "He's not the easiest person to get on with. He seems emotionless, but he really does care about the people he's in charge of. He can be cold and distant, but well, you'll see."</p><p>"Avoidant dismissive" I mutter to myself.</p><p>"What did you say?"</p><p>I stand up, sigh and blow a stray lock of hair from my face. "Avoidant dismissive. An avoidant dismissive person's emotional development typically stems from the loss of a parent early in life. In this particular case I'm guessing the nurturer; mother. AND I'm willing to bet my car, that the father was never in the picture at all. He's probably been abandoned more than once in his life. So, in order to protect themselves, avoidant dismissives teach themselves to repress emotions, avoid attachment, and dismiss all the above when necessary. He doesn't know how to handle emotions and other's feelings, so he dismisses them as beneath him and utilizes them when convenient only."</p><p>"How could you possibly know all that?" Sasha gazes at me with wonder.</p><p>"It doesn't matter. My old life is apparently over." I sigh, and look over at Sasha apologetically. "Look, thank you for the insights, but I don't think your Captain and I will ever see eye to eye. On anything. Is there a training room around here? I could stand to let off a little steam."</p><p>"Sure, down the hall and to the right."</p><p>I wave over my shoulder as I make my way down the hall. 'If I'm right in my assessment, how awful. No. I'm not going to feel sorry for this guy. He's been nothing but unpleasant since the moment we met'...</p><p>'you threatened to kill him Heather'....</p><p>'His dumbass attacked my car'....</p><p>'Quit making excuses'...</p><p>'I'm not thinking about this a second longer.' I shake my head, as if to dismiss my thoughts, and enter the training room.</p><p>Levi is standing around the corner watching me. 'That bitch. How can she possibly know all that? What the fuck? What am I? An open book to her? No. She doesn't know me. And what did she mean, her old life is over?'...</p><p>'She can't even follow orders, look at her. Who gave her permission to be down here?'...He continues to watch me, more than a little interested.</p><p>'Well, she moves well, and clearly has combat training. Let's see how she holds up...might be a bit satisfying to knock some of that fire out of her.'...</p><p>He stops mid-stride. 'Did she call me a fungus?!' A little infuriated with everything he had overheard, he removes his jacket and cloak, and walks up behind me.</p><p>"Spar."</p><p>I stop mid kick and freeze. 'ugh. not him. not now.' I stand up, and turn around to look at him. "No thanks." I say, trying to walk past him. He bars my way and repeats himself.</p><p>"Spar."</p><p>With no warning at all, I begin to attack him. He's mostly blocking at this point and I can tell he's toying with me. I'm throwing fast upper cuts, left hooks and right hooks seemingly at random, but he counters effortlessly with a bored expression on his face. Frustrating. Out of nowhere, he punches me square in the face. I stumble back a couple paces, but recover my balance quickly as he walks slowly towards me, not caring. I hit him back, and then grabbing my forearm and rolling his hip into me he takes me down to the mat. We're grappling, but neither of us really has an advantage over the other. I'm better at the wrestling aspect of fighting anyway. 'she's stronger than I thought, and quick' he thinks to himself, 'but I'll be damned if she's going to get the satisfaction of winning this battle'. Eventually, he breaks the headlock I've currently got him in and pins me down.</p><p>"Are your fighting skills really this poor..or do you like to be dominated?" He's gazing down at me with a mocking gleam in his eyes.</p><p>'Oh you asshole', I think to myself as I flip my legs up and around his waist. Getting a hold of him I arch up into him and roll us so that I'm now pinning him. "No thanks, I prefer being on top".</p><p>He lies there glaring at me, and just then a bunch of cadets come in and I shove away from him. Grabbing a towel from the rack beside me, I exit the training room leaving them gawking and whispering amongst themselves. Catching up to me, Levi grabs my arm and drags me to a halt.</p><p>"Do you even know how to follow orders? Who the fuck told you you could come down here? You were supposed to be in the mess hall." Without sparing him a single glance, I pull my arm from his grasp and continue to walk.</p><p>"I told you not to touch me." He grabs me again anyway, and guides me up the stairs and back to his quarters. Once inside, I make my way to his lumpy ass couch and grab my backpack. I'm hit in the face with a blanket.</p><p>"Here's where you stay.", he orders and walks out slamming the door behind him.</p><p>Levi's Journal: This bitch thinks she knows me. Hardly. I'm not one of her little subjects to analyze and if she wants to pick a fight with me, she's got it. Just because Erwin made her my issue doesn't mean I have to like it, and maybe a beating will knock the bitchiness out of her. I know her fucking type. She plays it cool to hide the fact that she doesn't know what the hell is going on, but she better fall in line before her and her stupid car get shredded by titans. In the meantime she can sleep on the lumpy ass couch. I hope the bitch breaks her neck on it.</p><p>Heather's Journal: Just because your life is shit doesn't mean you need to make everyone around you suffer too. At least that's my opinion. Who am I talking about? Cue the suspenseful music....assface, who else? Fucking hobbit. At least I got the opportunity to take it out on him in the training room. I don't think he expected me to hold my own at all. Hell, I wasn't even trying. Let him come at me again. Oh I fucking dare him. Fuck his face. Do i like being dominated? Not by him! That will NEVER happen! Little troll....</p><p>Three Days Later:</p><p>"For crying out loud would you get some sleep? I swear you are up and down so much it's driving me crazy".</p><p>Levi looks up with an annoyed expression. "Deal with it, I have work to do."</p><p>"It's two in the morning! Are you effing kidding me? What could you possibly have to do?"</p><p>"How about you quit being a bitch and just go to sleep?"</p><p>"I WOULD if you'd just turn off the damn light and go to sleep yourself."</p><p>"Why did I get stuck with you? I have all this stuff to do and I can't do it with all your complaining!"</p><p>"And I wouldn't be complaining if you'd just shut the light off and go to bed." Rolling my eyes, I comment under my breath, "Geez, you need to get laid."</p><p>"What did you just say?"</p><p>"LAID, Levi. Screwed. Go find yourself someone and bust a nut. Then maybe, just MAYBE you'll not only be in a decent mood for a change you'll hopefully sleep like a normal person!"</p><p>Coming around the desk to stand before me, he glares and says sarcastically "Are you offering?"</p><p>"If it means I'll get some sleep tonight, YES!" I tell him with equal sarcasm.</p><p>Glaring at each other, he eventually storms back to his bedroom. 'what a bitch...I need to get laid? Is that what she said? To hell with her, what I NEED is to get her the hell out of my hair. Does she think she owns the place now? I can't work because she's sleeping? I don't give a crap'..He stops for a moment, eyebrow raised...</p><p>'huh, what would she have done if I took her up on her stupid little offer? I know she was just saying that to get a rise out of me, but still' He rolls his eyes and continues to get ready for bed...</p><p>'and am I actually a little bit hornry???...oh fuck my life', he lets out a frustrated groan and flops grumpily onto his bed</p><p>'....congratulations bitch, you were successful, you got a 'rise' out of me, but I'll be damned if I'll be acknowledging that urge......BITCH!!'</p><p>Meanwhile: 'I understand having insomnia, I struggle with it from time to time but honestly....what a little troll.'...</p><p>'I have a feeling I really stuck my foot in my mouth calling out his obviously repressed ass. Glad he didn't take me seriously! And now I'm too pissed about this to go to sleep. Good grief he just rubs me the wrong way. Hell, he probably doesn't even know HOW to rub a woman the RIGHT way...' Giggling unexpectedly, I clamp my hand over my mouth not wanting him to come out and ask.</p><p>'my dumb ass would probably tell him exactly what was on my mind, too...' Giggling again I roll my eyes helplessly and try to muffle my sounds with a pillow...</p><p>'What the hell is she laughing about? God woman, go the hell to sleep.' Rolling over, he puts his pillow over his head and tries to ignore the hysterics in the living room.</p><p>Levi's Journal: Well, the bitch is at it again. Not like she stops. I need to get laid? Her and her smart mouth are about to be planted six feet under. I'll just tell Erwin she disappeared in the night. He can fucking look for her all he wants. Good luck.</p><p>I need to get laid.... Whatever you dumb bitch No one NEEDS that shit. And that smartass can count herself lucky I'm not the kind of asshole to take her up on such a thing. Why would anyone want a piece of work like her anyway??</p><p>What the fuck is so funny out there? I would love to go out there and beat her to sleep with her backpack, but the last thing I need is for her to notice what her stupid comments did to me. Bitch.</p><p>Heathers Journal: Does this guy ever sleep, or does he just fuel himself on the tears and pain of others? I swear to everything sacred, if he wakes me up again I'm going to knock him unconscious. That way, he'll have no choice but to sleep. 'I have work to do'... 2 in the morning. What in the blazes? Hahaha though, the look on his face when I told him I'd screw him if it meant sleep afterwards. PRICELESS! So glad he didn't take me up on that. Ew. Seriously sometimes my foot just lives in my mouth!</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. The Backpack</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"LEVI! What ARE you doing to that poor girl?!!" Hanji eyes us both with amusement.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next evening:</p><p>I was having a surprisingly pleasant evening until the troll came home. "Give me your backpack." He reaches his hand out expectantly, clearly used to being obeyed.</p><p>"Excuse me?"</p><p>"Your backpack. Give it here, now."</p><p>"No! It's got personal stuff!" I grab my backpack and pull it tightly to my chest.</p><p>"It might have other stuff, and I don't trust you so hand it over."</p><p>"I don't trust you, hand it over", I mock him, "God, Levi your brain must be smaller than your dick. Like why would I 'hand it over' to someone who doesn't 'trust' me?"</p><p>Reaching out he grabs the backpack and tries to pull it from my grasp. "Stop saying shit like...OW! Did you just kick me??!"</p><p>"Let go, Levi!" Yanking back, I turn and pull the backpack with me keeping my back to him. He wraps me in a bear hug and kicks the back of my knee, causing me to drop to the floor and he's still trying to get the stupid backpack. "Mmph! Let...go!" I gasp trying to keep it out of reach. Shoving the backpack forward, I throw my head back and connect with his chin.</p><p>"Damn it woman!" The hit to his face allows me to scoot forward after my backpack and I almost have it when he tackles me from behind. Getting up on all fours with him still clinging to me, I scoot forward another inch. 'Got it! yes!' Except he's also got me too. Grabbing me around the waist, he pulls me back against him. Panting, and wide eyed we both stop our struggle when the door bursts open.</p><p>"LEVI! What ARE you doing to that poor girl?!!" Hanji eyes us both with amusement.</p><p>"YES...LEVI, what ARE you trying to do to me?" I say, bumping his groin away from me with my hip and standing up. "Maybe I'd be safer staying somewhere else!"</p><p>"You little bitch!"</p><p>Trying desperately not to laugh, Hanji grabs the backpack. "All I hear is a bunch of grunting and panting, then walk in to THIS lovely sight...Is this what this was about?"</p><p>"I need to see what's in there Hanji."</p><p>"I SAID it's personal, so NO!!"</p><p>Hanji sighs. "She said it's personal, Levi. Did you forget how to adult? Heather, may I look in your backpack?"</p><p>"Yes Hanji, you may."</p><p>Hanji walks over to the other side of the room and I follow. Glancing back at Levi; I blow him a kiss, wink and then flip him the bird before turning around and joining Hanji.</p><p>Fists clenched in anger, Levi just glares and wishes Hanji would leave so he can punch me square in the face. 'what the hell was that supposed to mean? How does she manage to get under my skin so badly?'</p><p>"Levi, there's nothing bad in here. I would however like to know more about this headset if you don't mind, Heather it's amazing!"</p><p>"Sure thing Hanji!" Heading for the door, Hanji stops and looks back at Levi, smiling mischievously.</p><p>"You need to work on your game Levi. What it looked like you were trying to do...you SHOULD at least buy her dinner first."</p><p>"She's not wrong, dickhead." I say, lying down with my backpack for a pillow. Hanji laughs uproariously and shuts the door.</p><p>Levi storms over and leaning close states "Fuck...you" through gritted teeth.</p><p>"Fuck me? Did you miss the whole advice part about dinner Levi?" Rolling my eyes I turn my back. Extremely frustrated, Levi storms out slamming the door behind him.</p><p>Levi's Journal: Hanji is a bitch. Siding with HER! And why the fuck does everything have to turn into some disgusting sexual joke? "You need to work on your game Levi". Fuck you Hanji. And the damn dick jokes need to stop too, I swear I'm going to lose my shit on this girl!</p><p>Stupid backpack. All because she doesn't want to listen. I don't care what Hanji says, I'm going to see what's in there, and if she would've just handed the stupid thing to me in the first place, I wouldn't have to deal with Hanji's stupid bullshit. If I catch any flack for this, I'm going to crack them both in their stupid faces.</p><p>Heathers Journal: Ew the feel of this man's hands on me is NAUSEATING! And seriously? He orders me to give him my backpack like I'm some cadet? I'm NOT one of his soldiers, and quite frankly I don't want to be stuck with him at all. He's rude, he thinks intimidating me is going to get him somewhere, and I can't stand him! Thankfully Hanji showed up when she did, I hope he felt like an ass especially considering the rather compromising position she discovered us in. Haha you little troll.</p><p>The next evening I'm startled by the clattering of silverware and a tray. Levi stands in front of me, staring at me coldly.</p><p>"Dinner is served Princess." He says sarcastically.</p><p>I eye the bowl of stew and bread suspiciously. Looking up, I find him still standing there watching me. "What do you want?...Oh, riiiight...you got me dinner...following Hanji's advice? Expecting your reward?...Ew."</p><p>Feeling slightly insulted, and unsure why he even cares he walks away muttering under his breath about 'the bitch'. Sitting at his desk, he looks at me for a moment, mutters "Eat.", and starts reviewing the paperwork on his desk.</p><p>I take a mouthful of the stew, and let it fall out of my mouth back into the bowl.</p><p>Levi gets up from his work and walks over. "I'm sorry princess, is that not to your liking? Forgive me."</p><p>"Don't call me that."</p><p>"Well then quit making comments about my dick all the time."</p><p>"Insecure? Am I right?"</p><p>"Do you want to find out? Is that it?"</p><p>"God, you are so disgusting! Why would I be interested in...whatever the hell you're hiding in you're pants?" I say, waving my hand dismissively at it with a disgusted look on my face.</p><p>"Well, 'princess', you're the one that keeps commenting on it."</p><p>"What? You're shameful secret?"</p><p>Looking like he's about to go on a murderous rampage, Levi throws his hands up and walks back to his desk. "Eat...your damn...dinner. I don't care if you like it or not you stupid ass bi-" He's hit in the face with the bread.</p><p>Levi's Journal: I don't know why I feel so insulted, or why I even care what this woman thinks. I need to stop letting her get to me or this is going to get ugly real fast. I know I keep making the threats and then I don't deliver on them. I'm sure that has a lot to do with why she continues to goad me. She KNOWS I can't touch her. This pisses me off more than anything. She knows I can't really do a damn thing about her behavior except bitch to my superiors, and she loves it. I just know she does. One of these days though, I'm going to crack and ain't nothing going to hold me back. She'll be in the infirmary for a month, and I'll have my fucking solitude back. Fuckin little princess.</p><p>Heathers Journal: I found that if I make fun of Levi's 'manhood' he gets so angry his left eye twitches! How funny! It must be true. And what the hell has possessed him to start calling me Princess? Ew, save the pet names for someone else no matter how sarcastic you mean it. Not that anyone would want the cranky little shit. Maybe that's why he's such a jerk. He's lonely. Well, I'm certainly not surprised</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Levi's Plan</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I should get some work done." levi mutters to himself. This is the fifth time he's gotten up since going to bed, and he's no longer really tired. "Better be quiet, heaven forbid I wake the princess..." Chuckling to himself, he exits his bedroom and immediately sees I'm not on the couch. No light coming from the bathroom either. 'shit, where is she?'</p><p>Glancing over at the table, he sees I still havent touched my food. Rolling his eyes he thinks, 'mess hall?...I'm going to kill her.' Exiting his quarters, he heads downstairs muttering to himself.</p><p>'ungrateful, rude, intolerable, pretty..' He shakes his head at the thought,'...pretty annoying, I mean....' Poking his head inside the mess hall, he sees no one.</p><p>'Huh.' he checks the kitchen, not there either.</p><p>'What if she took her car and left?' Feeling a bit panicked at the thought, he rushes out of the mess hall.</p><p>He stops halfway to Hanji's loading area when he hears the sound of muffled kicks and punches in the opposite direction. 'the training room....sounds like she might need another sparring match...' Grinning to himself, he walks briskly down the hall, anticipating wrapping his hands around my neck.</p><p>'Just give me a reason you bitch, just...no. Wait.' He takes a moment to think, watching me unload on the punching bag.</p><p>'Maybe I just need to change my tactics....If she hates me as bad as I think she does, maybe if I act like I don't hate her...QUITE the opposite....maybe she'll be too disgusted to do anything other than fall in line'. His plan formulating, he walks up behind me, grabs my arm and yanks me backwards.</p><p>"What are you doing down here?" He gives me a very unreadable smile.</p><p>I give a yelp of surprise and jump back from him. He takes a step towards me, and I again move away.</p><p>"I said, what are you doing down here?" He reaches for my arm again, which I promptly pull away.</p><p>"Isn't it obvious? I'm pretending this punching bag is you!" He smirks, and steps closer.</p><p>"You're so cute when you're mad, Heather...." He smirks again, and reaches out to stroke my face.</p><p>"What? What did you say?" I stammer, looking panicked and for some god awful reason unable to move. Inwardly dancing with glee, Levi moves even closer.</p><p>"I said you're cute when you're mad...that thing that happens with your eyes...adorable." His gentle caress makes me shudder.</p><p>"Get away from me..."</p><p>"What's the matter? Are you afraid I'm going to do something to you?" Closer. Looking pointedly down at my chest, his smile widens.</p><p>"I said get away!"</p><p>"Or what?" Moving lightning quick, he scoops me up and throws me over his shoulder.</p><p>"Levi, you better put me down!"</p><p>"Ain't happening." He carries me struggling all the way back to his quarters and tosses me onto the couch. He sits next to me, and I try to move away but he just moves with me. Grabbing my chin, he forces me to look at him. He leans in close, breath tickling my ear.</p><p>"If I can't trust you to stay where you're supposed to, what do you think we should do to remedy that?"</p><p>"Let me stay somewhere else!"</p><p>"Hmmmm, no....Erwin's orders were very clear...He pretends to think for a moment, and then smiles. "Wait, I KNOW, seeing I can't take my eyes off you for a moment maybe I should just have you sleep WITH me. That way I'll know if you're causing trouble...do you like that idea? Princess?"</p><p>He can tell by the horrified look on my face that I most definitely do NOT like that idea, and it takes all his willpower to not laugh and ruin everything. 'finally got the upper hand with her, but please don't call my bluff...last thing I want is YOU in my bed.' He thinks to himself, and then out loud; "So what's it going to be? Will you behave? Or do we snuggle?"</p><p>'gross! Oh you ASSHOLE!' I think and then jumping off the couch away from him, I recover my sass. "Great! then I can smother your dumb ass with a pillow!"</p><p>"What will that accomplish if the only pillow you have is me..." He gets up, flings me over his shoulder and starts walking to his bedroom.</p><p>"No! Let me go! God, this is so gross! I'll stay on the stupid couch, just put me DOWN!"</p><p>He lets go of me and I fall to the floor. "Good.", Is all he says as he walks without looking back to his bedroom.</p><p>Levi's Journal: I figure if I play with her obvious disgust in me, maybe I can scare her into listening. Threats sure as hell don't work, but tell her she just might be getting a little closer to my 'tiny dick', well finally Levi scores a point. About damn time! The look of absolute horror on her face when she realized I was serious., I'm going to be playing that back in my head all night. Of course, if she slips up I'll have to carry through with my little ruse but it will be worth it. For the first time in weeks I actually feel  pretty good.</p><p>Heathers Journal: Okay first the princess thing, and now this? Ew, you're so cute when you're mad, heather? Ugh did he have to say that? He's creeping me out. I'd rather jump out his window straight into a titan's mouth than 'snuggle' with him! And Levi hands in unauthorized places! Yuck!</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Levi vs. Heather (This bed isn't big enough for both of us)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Are you going to stay here tonight? Not go on any adventures?" Leaning in close, he strokes my hair away from my forehead and I flinch.</p><p>"Yes, I'm staying here. Are you disappointed?"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next day:</p><p>'this is stupid, I just sit here and watch the cadets train, and listen to Levi yell at them all day. How boring. They get yelled at even worse if they say something nice to me. And his attitude today, what's up with that? He's being disgustingly sweet...and creepy. And what did he mean when that long faced boy smiled at me earlier? He said 'that's not yours Jean....' I glance quickly at him.</p><p>'This morning at breakfast, sneaking his arm around my waist....' I shudder.</p><p>'and when I woke up this morning, he was sitting on the damn couch looking down at me like....ugh and his hand stroking my hair out of my face...' Shuddering again, I block the thought.</p><p>As if on cue, he turns to look at me. Smiling, he winks and turns back to the cadets. 'ew.'</p><p>"Is there SOMETHING I can do? I'm tired of sitting here."</p><p>He turns to me, and smiling points to the stables. "Of course, go feed the horses." Relieved at having something to do, but kind of unnerved at his weird behavior I head to the stables. Looking back, I can see him still watching me, that wretched grin on his face. Entering the stables, I take a deep breath and enjoy the solitude. It's nice and quiet, and good to get away.</p><p>Levi walks in an hour later to find me deep in conversation with his horse. "You're a pretty girl, aren't you?" The horse nods her head. "Yes you are!" I give her an apple and rub her head.</p><p>"What are you doing?" I turn to find him leaning up against the door, his hands in his pockets.</p><p>"Feeding the horses, like you said."</p><p>"You're having a conversation with my horse?"</p><p>"Best conversation i've had since getting here."</p><p>"Oh that's amusing, princess. It's lunch, let's go."</p><p>Ignoring him I continue talking to his horse. "Do you like being Levi's horse?" She shakes her head and I laugh. "I wouldn't either."</p><p>He rolls his eyes. "Let's go."</p><p>"I'm not hungry."</p><p>"You have to eat something."</p><p>"Why? If I starve, your problems are solved, Levi."</p><p>He starts walking towards me, a big grin on his face. "I'm not really hungry either but I could use a nap, maybe you should join me...." He reaches out to touch me and I jump back.</p><p>"Ew! Gross! Tasteless gruel sounds great, lets go."</p><p>'That's what I thought, you bitch', he thinks following me out of the stables. "You can go back to my quarters when we're done. Do stay there and be a good girl."</p><p>"Either my throwing arm is stronger than I thought, or that bread I hit you with was rock hard. What the hell is wrong with you?" Putting his hand on the small of my back, he guides me into the mess hall.</p><p>"Maybe I'm just seeing you in a different light....." Grinning, he grabs a tray and turns to sit down.</p><p>He doesn't come back until late, and I'm already lying down to sleep. Coming up to the couch, he sits down and I can't scoot away. 'ugh, what does he want?'</p><p>"Are you going to stay here tonight? Not go on any adventures?" Leaning in close, he strokes my hair away from my forehead and I flinch.</p><p>"Yes, I'm staying here. Are you disappointed?"</p><p>He just smiles and goes to his room without another word. 'this is going better than I expected. No attitude except the occasional slip up from the little bitch', he chuckles to himself</p><p>'this must be soo difficult for her....good'. He settles in for the night.</p><p>'what a creep threatening to make me sleep next to him, that's so disgusting. And that smug look of his like he won some kind of battle. He was bluffing...I bet he was bluffing, and I'm going to call him out on it.' I roll over, irritated.</p><p>'...wait', I sit up, worried. 'what if he isn't bluffing? I mean, how badly do you want to test this?' Tossing and turning and getting more irritated by the second thinking about the fact that he actually DID kind of win, I can't help my stupid mouth. 'is he bluffing, or not? let's roll them dice...'</p><p>"Leeeeviiii!"</p><p>Rolling over, he groans and puts his pillow over his head.</p><p>"Leeeviiii"</p><p>Bolting upright in his bed, he puts his face in his hands and sighs. 'what does she want?'</p><p>"What the hell do you want?" he mumbles irritatedly.</p><p>"I'm feeling like going to the training room again, maybe you should keep an eye on me...."</p><p>'WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE SAY????!!!!'</p><p>"Leeeeviiii"</p><p>He storms to the door, only to stop and turn back to his bed. 'she's calling your bluff Levi. What are you going to do now? Should've known this streak wouldn't last...' He heads back towards the door again only to once again turn around. Stopping mid stride he steps towards the door, shakes his head, turns again and stops. Biting down on his knuckles, he tries to think.</p><p>'If I don't go out there, she'll know I was bluffing. If I do, then I'll have to follow through and that annoying shit will be in my bed...' He's pacing again. Rolling his eyes, he mutters "fuck", and heads out the door.</p><p>Putting on his game face, he smiles and heads towards me. I'm staring at him amused. My amusement turns to disgust when I realize that he's about to follow through with his threat. 'damn it'. He grabs me up, kicking and punching and heads for his room. 'Wait Heather, this is perfect', I think trying not to grin.</p><p>"You require company tonight princess? Of course, anything you wish..." He says sarcastically and tosses me on the bed. Suddenly uncomfortable, Levi studies me closely. I'm just lying there smiling up at him. 'what's she got up her sleeve?' Cautiously, he moves over to his side of the bed. A moment later, he feels the bed move and 'oh god, what..is..she doing?' I wrap my arms around him and nestle my head against his chest.</p><p>Shoving me away, he sits up horrified. "What is this shit?! Get off me!" I scoot closer trying to grab him.</p><p>"Levi, YOU said you would be my pillow...YOU ALSO SAID, either I behaved or we snuggle...unless you were bluffing...."</p><p>At a loss as to how to respond to this whole mess, Levi flops back onto the bed and puts his arm over his eyes. 'shit...shit shit shit!' Meanwhile I snuggle back up to him again and pretend to go to sleep. 'this is so gross, but hella worth it!' I think to myself feeling how badly he's shaking and how loud his heart is pounding.</p><p>'oh you miserable shit, check mate.' He scoots away a bit, but I just wrap my leg over the top of him and snuggle in closer.</p><p>"P-please just go b-back to the couch!"</p><p>'did he just STUTTER?! Oh god I LOVE THIS!'</p><p>'did I just STUTTER? oh god, I HATE this!'</p><p>"Levi you literally told me only moments ago, 'anything you wish'....and I'm sooo comfortable..." Running my hand up his chest, I nestle in closer.</p><p>Scooting away again, he doesn't realize how close to the edge of the bed he is. He tumbles off the edge, hitting his head on the night table. I fly up off the bed and run for the living room laughing hysterically.</p><p>Levi's Journal: Should have known my luck would run out. Stupid bitch can't help herself. And now I look (and feel!) like an absolute idiot! Nevermind the fact she called my bluff, could my virgin ass be any more obvious? God, if she picked up on that, if she says one fucking word.... SHE MADE ME STUTTER LIKE A LITTLE BOY!!! Horrible slip Levi, you couldn't act like it didn't phase you??? God, in hindsight I wish I would of had the presence of mind to play along. That would of stopped her in her tracks.....fuck and now my bed smells like her too....</p><p>Heathers Journal: Well, I officially jumped out the window and fed myself to a titan. IT WAS WORTH IT!!!! Oh I called the little troll's bluff! He stuttered and fell and hit his head on his night table...I'm dying! Talking all that smack, but when it came down to it he was completely impotent! Maybe impotent isn't the right word for it. Flaccid? Limp? Hahahahaha! Nothin but a scared little boy. Thank goodness I called that correctly or I'd be the one with egg on my face right now. WORTH IT!!!!!</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Hanji</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Heathers Journal: So Hanji wants to run some experiments with me. Primarily, this makes me the subject. This woman is way too intense about this shit! I hate to say it, but I was really hoping Levi would come back. as if i need him to protect me from anything, but at that moment I kinda wanted him to. Ew. Nah, I'm sure he'd be totally down for watching me get poked at and prodded and god knows what else. I'm dying...this is kind of funny.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next morning was hilariously awkward, with me sitting on the couch grinning ear to ear and watching him intently. He comes out of his bedroom, and upon seeing me he stumbles. Recovering quickly, he heads beet red for his desk. Giggling, I look down hurriedly at my book.</p><p>His head snaps up and he glares at me. "B-b-bitch." Mortified, he looks down at his paperwork again unwilling to meet my eyes. 'what's wrong with me?' He hears me giggle again. Slamming his pen down, it ends up bouncing up at his face. Catching it, he spends a few moments juggling it before it just ends up on the floor. I laugh even harder. Getting up, and knocking his chair over in the process, he storms over to me full of his usual ire. Gone is that sweet boy bullshit facade he's been playing. Thank god.</p><p>"Would you stop being such a bitch!" Storming out the door, he stops when I call his name.</p><p>"Hey Levi....you're so 'cute' when you're angry..." He slams the door. 'oh that was pure hatred in his eyes Heather, pure hatred...but something else behind it. I wonder what?'</p><p>Storming down the hall, Levi tries to get himself back under control. 'Why is it so easy for her to shake me up like that!? God, I can't stand it..it pisses me off! She....she just...I don't even know anymore...god.'</p><p>"Levi!" 'ugh, not now....'</p><p>"Yes Hanji?"</p><p>"Where's Heather?"</p><p>"My quarters. Where else would she be?"</p><p>"Well, usually you have her following you around like a puppy all day..." Noting the amusement in her voice, his face reddens and he looks away.</p><p>"She can rot in there for all I care."</p><p>"Oh Levi, what did you do now?"</p><p>"What did I do? Me? Why is it always me??" Laughing and shaking her head Hanji just rolls her eyes.</p><p>"Give her some peace."</p><p>"I hate her Hanji."</p><p>"Oh? Do you now...tell me why you hate her."</p><p>"Why??....WHY, Hanji??"</p><p>"Yes, I want to know."</p><p>He rolls his eyes as if this should be obvious. "Cuz she's a bitch."</p><p>"And why is she a bitch?"</p><p>"I don't know! Why are you asking me these stupid questions anyway?"</p><p>"Because while I believe you hate her, I don't think you hate her for the reasons you think you do."</p><p>"What does that even mean, Hanji?"</p><p>"Levi, you're so dense.", Hanji says giving a little wave and walking away.</p><p>'stupid Hanji, what was that garbage..she's talking nonsense....' An image of me snuggled up to him flashes through his mind....'good grief, this is the last thing I want to think about...'</p><p>Heathers Journal: Awwww, someone sure is feeling awkward today, isn't he? At least he's stopped with the creepy molester guy crap. I might be suffering some PTSD from this. He was so angry when he left this morning, I couldn't resist telling him how 'cute' he was....</p><p>I jump at the sound of the door opening. "Heatherrrrr I have something exciting to share with you!" Hanji sings upon entering.</p><p>"Anything's better than staring at these blank ass walls...what's up?" Hanji smiles wickedly; glasses fogging,</p><p>"There are a few tests I've been dying to run and YOU are the perfect subject! Erwin said I could only perform these tests with your approval, so what do you say?"</p><p>"Of course it's only with my approval...Erwin's the only person here that realises I'm a human being...wait....what?"</p><p>"Tests!", she giggles, "Beautiful, perfect, astounding tests!"</p><p>Grimacing at the implications, I slink away from her muttering nervously. "Why do I suddenly want Levi here? Really, really bad?"</p><p>Excited, Hanji jumps up from the couch. "Yes? Okay great! Come with me!" She reaches out, trying to grab me.</p><p>"Whoa! NOBODY here knows personal space! If you can give me specific details on these tests, their purpose and NOT be so damn creepy, maybe I'll consider it..."</p><p>Hanji pauses and then takes a step back, clearing her throat and fixing her glasses. "So sorry I just get so excited about it all I can't help myself! The tests are specifically to see if my assumptions about alternate realities and human alterations is true, and if you being here could possibly wrinkle the fabric of reality and cause otherworldly destruction in both our dimensions. Is that enough info?"</p><p>I sigh and sit lost in thought for a moment. "I have books in the back of my car. Books about portals, dimensional travel, time-space continuum....black holes, all stuff that can answer what you're asking for."</p><p>"Great! I have a special place to run tests next to your bay if you'll follow me now. Everything is already set up!"</p><p>"Hanji, I said I'll consider it. Give me a day or two....was there anything else?"</p><p>Hanji is about to turn away, when she stops and grins. "Actually..there is something else on my mind...I was hoping you could tell me what happened between you and Levi that has him in a foul mood?"</p><p>"Levi is ALWAYS in a foul mood, Hanji."</p><p>"Fouler then..."</p><p>I take a deep breath, wondering what to actually tell this woman. A part of me wants to tell her everything, and hopefully garner some support against the creep, but on the other hand; I also feel like doing that would be an epic mistake.</p><p>"He's just been weird."</p><p>"Weird?"</p><p>"Like too nice, and a bit creepy about it. I'm sure it was all to get in my head, he seems his usual disagreeable self now, and back to hating me."</p><p>"Does that bother you?"</p><p>"A little. I don't feel like I deserved it, but I hate him too so at least we can agree on one thing right?"</p><p>"But why?"</p><p>"Why? Seriously? He treats me like crap and when I lash out at him for it, I'm a bitch. I never asked to be his fucking sidekick, and I don't want to be here but feeling utterly useless isn't fun either. So he continues to be a dick, like he expects me to be some meek little yes girl and to just eat up his attitude like it's the most wonderful part of my day, but I'm not putting up with his shit! I'm just not! Of course I hate him, what else would I possibly feel for a troll like that?!"</p><p>Hanji grins and shakes her head. "I think it's a lot more complicated than that for both of you, which is exactly WHY you both lash out at each other.....let me know when you're ready, Heather and we'll begin testing." She turns to leave, mumbling to herself about science stuff. Heading back to her lab, Hanji grins and claps her hands excitedly. 'ooooh these two are falling head over heels for each other, I just KNOW it!"</p><p>Levi's Journal: "I don't think you hate her for the reasons you think you do", oh for fuck sake Hanji shut the hell up. If you mean what I think you mean.... That's ridiculous. She's pretty, sure I'm not blind but that sure doesn't matter when underneath that smile and those eyes (and everything else I find myself staring at) she's a plain old bitch! Sometimes when she's looking out the window (and she does this frequently) totally peaceful as opposed to being hell bent on pissing me off, she's a little bit more than just pretty. Acknowledging this pisses me off, but if I can't be honest here then where? She made me feel like such an ass today, and the day is not even over with! I can't wait to find out what fresh hell she has in store for me later....</p><p>Heathers Journal: So Hanji wants to run some experiments with me. Primarily, this makes me the subject. This woman is way too intense about this shit! I hate to say it, but I was really hoping Levi would come back. as if i need him to protect me from anything, but at that moment I kinda wanted him to. Ew. Nah, I'm sure he'd be totally down for watching me get poked at and prodded and god knows what else. I'm dying...this is kind of funny.</p><p>I admit I'm curious as to how he's going to respond to this particular situation. And what Hanji said about us before she left. There isn't anything complicated about me hating him and him hating me!</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. A Lull in the Argument</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Hanji wants to experiment on me!"</p><p>"What????"</p>
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    <p>Distracted, Levi drums his fingers on Erwin's desk impatiently. 'come on and let's get this stupid meeting over with...I need to find out what hanji wants with her, I don't trust this. What are they talking about? Oh god, what is she telling Hanji? If she tells hanji about my stupid behavior these past couple days....and what happened last night i'm ruined....me and my stupid pride...so determined to be in control, acting like a douche just to get the better of her....'</p><p>"Levi?" he shakes his head and turns his attention back to Erwin, who has been apparently trying to get his attention for some time now.</p><p>"I'm sorry?"</p><p>"Is something wrong, Levi? You are very distracted today....are you writing in your journal? Are you even listening to me?"</p><p>"No, it's good. What were you saying?"</p><p>"I was asking you how this Heather is acclimating to our world...is she settling in?"</p><p>"Not you, too. She's not from another world, that's ridiculous. And to answer your question, she's a bitch and I hate her."</p><p>"Well you're going to be disappointed then, because I need you to get close to her. Find out everything there is to know about her."</p><p>"Her name is Heather. She is a bitch. Done."</p><p>Erwin sighs, leaning forward and looking at Levi earnestly. "She appears out of nowhere, with titan killing technology I don't think even Hanji has ever dreamed of...there's more to know, find it out." Rolling his eyes Levi heads for the door.</p><p>"Oh, and one more thing Levi...do TRY to be charming..."</p><p>Sighing Levi closes the door and heads back to his quarters.. Hanji is just exiting, and Levi pulls back around the corner, not wanting to be seen. 'the hell is she so excited about?', he thinks making his way to the door.</p><p>"Hey! What did Hanji want?", he asks entering. "Hey, I'm talking to you!" Why is she ignoring me? He comes around the couch to face me, reaching out to grab me roughly. 'oh right, I'm supposed to be "charming" ', he thinks and instead sits on the couch next to me. 'what's wrong with her? why is she shaking like that? she looks like she's about to-' the thought is interrupted as I turn to him and grab him by the shirt.</p><p>"Hanji wants to experiment on me!"</p><p>"What????"</p><p>We stare at each other for a moment and then I burst into gales of laughter. After a moment, he's surprised to find himself joining in. Looking at each other, we seem to realize what just passed between us and the laughter dries up. We move to other sides of the couch, looking away awkwardly.</p><p>Clearing his throat, he looks at me cautiously. "What kind of experiments, exactly?"</p><p>I curl up on the couch, keeping space between us. "Not entirely sure...I've got plenty of books she can read that will answer her questions. She wants blood samples and things like that...", I giggle "I think she thinks I'm some other species of human!" Giggling again, I continue. "I don't know what else she's got in store..."</p><p>"I'd like to see you in a test tube..." Levi says mischievously.</p><p>Eyes and mouth wide, I burst into laughter again kicking him playfully. "He jokes!"</p><p>"Who said I was joking..."</p><p>"Levi!!" I kick him again, and he grabs my ankle yanking me towards him.</p><p>"We can put you in a cage...." He leans in closer.</p><p>"Oh you would like that, wouldn't you?!", I say poking his nose with my forefinger; which he grabs.</p><p>"Immensely.", he says chuckling again. A moment later he turns serious and sits back up. "I don't like this..." I quickly follow suit.</p><p>"What's not to like about me being slowly tortured, Levi?"</p><p>At a loss, Levi doesn't know how to answer. 'yeah levi, why DO you care', he thinks to himself.</p><p>"I'm going to go talk to her." He starts to get up, but I pull him back down. He looks at the hand holding onto him for a moment. "What, Heather."</p><p>"It's okay, I'm going to let her have the harmless stuff. I'll even help her with the analysis...once she sees I'm a regular human being just like everyone else, she'll back off."</p><p>"I don't like this..."</p><p>"Levi, I'm fairly certain this body in it's entirety belongs to me, not you. It's okay, i'll do it. I've had blood drawn before it's nothing."</p><p>"Okay, but sleep on it. Give it some more thought. I'm going to bed." With that, he heads to his bedroom. 'damn, i forgot all about getting info...ah well, plenty of time for that'.</p><p>Levi's Journal: I may have been joking about the situation, but to be honest I don't like this one bit. What kind of experiments Hanji? What is wrong with everyone around here. "She's not from our world, she's different." I try to argue and I'M the one who's looked at like I grew a second head! Seriously, what is she going to do to her??? Whatever she does she better not hurt her or even Erwin won't be able to stop me from breaking that four-eyed face!</p><p>I just reread what I wrote earlier, and honestly why do I care if the dumb bitch gets hurt or not?? And she's right, Hanji will see she's nothing special, and move on to some other ridiculous experiment! I can't believe we were sitting there laughing together over this. More to the point, why did I get so carried away? I don't want her touching me at all! And I certainly don't want to touch her! What the hell possessed me?! Also, why did she let me? Caught in the moment? Surely that's all it is...</p><p>Heathers Journal: I don't know what happened tonight, but it was weird. Way too much friendly, you hate him REMEMBER?? Did we actually kind of get along? I'm sure this won't last very long but it was kind of a relief to be able to talk to him without wanting to kick his balls into his throat. And the biggest shock of all? He DOES have a sense of humor. The only thing is it takes the possibility of me being tortured to bring it out. His laugh is kind of cute....ew, why did I say that?</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. The Experiment</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>'I should just kiss her right now, that will wipe that look off her face wouldn't it...stupid bitch...'</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Heather! I'm so excited that you're here, we've got sooo much to do and I read you're books and I've got sooo many questions and...oh look Levi is here too oh this is perfect I've been wondering if women from your world can mate with men from-"</p><p>"HANJI!!!!" Levi and I yell in unison, our faces equally red. She stops mid-rant, and catching her breath, clears her throat.</p><p>"Well, That's getting a little ahead of myself Heather, let's get started." I look longingly over at my car and reluctantly follow, Leaving a very embarrassed Levi behind. He walks over to my car, slowly circling it. 'this has got to be the strangest device I've ever seen...maybe she IS from another world, I would've never believed something like this existed. No, that's stupid I-'</p><p>"Hey Levi!" Startled from his thoughts, he glances over to see me sitting on a stool with a band around my arm. "Hands off my car, yo!"  Hanji is approaching with a long needle...</p><p>"Hey! Hanji!", he strides over quickly. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"</p><p>"Levi, relax, she's drawing my blood. It's fine."</p><p>"I'm NOT worried about you, I just want to know what's going-"</p><p>"Angle the needle, Hanji! Don't just stab it in there!"</p><p>"Sorry, Heather."</p><p>Embarrassed by his reaction, Levi clears his throat. "I'm just going to go back to my quarters." Hanji gives him a knowing wink, which causes his cheeks to flame up even further. 'Stupid girl and her stupid car. Why'd she have to come here? Causes me nothing but trouble when all I want to do is protect her...' He stops at his door, alarmed at the thought that just passed through his head. 'on Erwin's orders of course....'</p><p>Levi's Journal: As if that wink wasn't annoying enough why the hell did Hanji have to make a suggestion like that? I swear sometimes her brain goes into a completely different place than the rest of humanity and the resulting shit that comes out of her mouth is brain damaging!</p><p>And now I feel stupid again because I was so worried about what Hanji was about to do that I didn't think about how I was letting my concern show. That's not something I want to even admit to myself let alone have Heather catch wind of....</p><p>And seriously? A mating experiment?? In what fucked up world would I ever agree to that?? I don't even want to imagine.....</p><p>I'm imagining it, OF course I am. God damn you Hanji for putting that in my head to begin with. And damn you also Heather with your stupid pretty eyes and your stupid pretty smile. I'm getting more pissed off the more I write (and think) about it. I hope she doesn't come home soon, I don't think I have the patience for her right now.</p><p>Heathers Journal: Hahaha Hanji is kind of a trip. Let's do an experiment with you and Levi...mating? OH FUCK WOMAN!!!! I don't think I've ever seen him that embarrassed, and believe me I've tried! (To embarrass him...NOT the mating thing) But everything is going exactly how I expected it to, and now all I have to do is wait for the results to be complete. I wonder what's up with that Eren kid? He was down there the whole time and it seems to me that they were doing some experiments on him, too. He's a little hot head... cracks me up.</p><p>A couple hours have passed, and I'm finally back from Hanji's lab. Levi looks up expectantly.</p><p>"Well?"</p><p>"Well what?"</p><p>"What's the verdict?"</p><p>"Bad news is Hanji's a little disappointed that I don't have some otherworldly human superpowers."</p><p>"And the good news?"</p><p>"I'm a plain old ordinary human, congratulations, we can mate." I laugh at his red face, and grabbing a book lie down on the couch.</p><p>"Oh that's GREAT!", he says sarcastically. "Let's go right now!"</p><p>"Really? Gosh, I was HOPING you'd say that, Levi!"</p><p>Very irritated, Levi gets up and storms over to the couch, grabbing me by the shirt and pulling me up nose to nose with him. "You can only dream Heather."</p><p>"Why would I set myself up for THAT disappointment, Levi...you don't know how to do anything except piss out of that tiny thing!"</p><p>"Bitch!"</p><p>"Centimeter peter!" I yell, holding my thumb and forefinger really close together.</p><p>"Stop making fun of my damn dick, you piece of shit!"</p><p>"Stop getting so stupid and angry over a little joke, Angry inch!"</p><p>"I'm fucking warning you!"</p><p>"Yeah? What exactly are you going to do? I don't think hitting me will go over well with your superiors! I was joking, and YOU blew up at me first! Dick!"</p><p>Getting angry at the look on my face, Levi curls his fist. 'she's egging me on...and why did I have to get so irritated in the first place, she WAS joking. it's Hanji's fault for even suggesting that...and we wouldn't be fighting right now if I'd just kept my cool....'</p><p>'god, what a troll...i wasn't trying to make him mad at all and now look at us...'</p><p>'I should just kiss her right now, that will wipe that look off her face wouldn't it...stupid bitch...' We continue to glare at each other. 'just throw her up against the wall and....' Irritated at the temptation of it, he shoves me to the couch, and storms out slamming the door behind him.</p><p>Levi's Journal: I knew it. I knew we would end up at each other's throats. She just had to make a crack about the stupid mating thing, and I lost my temper. I know damn well I shouldn't be taking it out on her, but why can't she shut up about some things? You wouldn't find this so amusing if you knew what I was thinking about ALL afternoon, would you bitch! AND what I'm currently tempted to do for that matter....</p><p>Heathers Journal: Well the hiatus (sp?) is over and it's 'behold the knight of dickington, sir peckerhead' again. He must of really got himself all jacked up over Hanji's suggestion, cuz all I did was make a tiny joke about it and he was immediately set off. Of course, that then set me off as well and then well, you know. Penis taunts and threats to beat my ass. He certainly looked like he wanted to punch me or something. Ha, something? Sure, what else would he possibly want to do???</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Gossip and Distractions</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! IF I HEAR ONE MORE WORD OUT OF THIS TABLE, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU WILL BE UP TO YOUR ELBOWS IN HORSESHIT FOR THE REST OF YOUR MISERABLE LIVES!!! AM I CLEAR?" Finally noticing the Captain sitting behind them, the table goes dead silent.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Levi storms into the mess hall, and grabbing a tray heads to the nearest empty table. Hearing the conversation at the table behind him, he quickly realizes that the topic is him and 'dammit' Heather.</p><p>"Hanji's tests concluded that she's human..." Eren says.</p><p>"Well, no shit, does she look any different than the rest of us?" Jean shoots back.</p><p>"Well, she's from another world, and that might mean that there are physiological differences..."</p><p>"PHYSIOLOGICAL DIFFERENCES? God, Eren, just because you're Hanji's pet lab rat doesn't make you a scientific expert all of a sudden!"</p><p>"Shut up, horse-face! I'm only repeating what Hanji said."</p><p>"Don't call me..."</p><p>"Eren", Mikasa interrupts calmly, "Tell them what Hanji tried to do." Bursting into hysterics, and damn near choking on his food, Eren continues.</p><p>"Hanji's suggestion was to find out if women from her world could mate with men from our world...and....and"</p><p>"Come on Eren, out with it. What!?" Snorting laughter, Eren takes a deep breath. "Captain Levi was there and..." He couldn't finish his sentence through all his laughter, but everyone understood where he was going. Dead silence enveloped the table for a moment, before everyone started laughing uproariously.</p><p>"Is Hanji still alive?" Connie asks, wiping tears from his face.</p><p>Sasha took that moment to steal a potato from his plate and cramming it in her mouth, asks "So how did they react?"</p><p>"Neither one seemed too keen on the idea."</p><p>"He'd be a moron to say no to that, I'll gladly take his place..." Jean says mischievously.</p><p>Everyone bursts out into laughter, and Reiner shoots milk out his nose onto a very unfortunate Armin. Grabbing a napkin, he tries to help clean it up. "Sorry, man..." Armin just shrugs it off.</p><p>"OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! IF I HEAR ONE MORE WORD OUT OF THIS TABLE, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU WILL BE UP TO YOUR ELBOWS IN HORSESHIT FOR THE REST OF YOUR MISERABLE LIVES!!! AM I CLEAR?" Finally noticing the Captain sitting behind them, the table goes dead silent. Irritated, Levi shoves his untouched food away and exits the mess hall. 'damn it, am I going to get crap about this from everybody??' Heading back to his quarters reluctantly, he hears Erwin calling his name from down the hall. 'dammit'</p><p>"Yes, Erwin, what do you need?"</p><p>"Have you gotten anywhere with miss Heather?"</p><p>Levi inwardly groans. "No...but didn't you want to ask about our mating success? Apparently that topic is AAAALL the rage!"</p><p>"Whaaaat? I said be charming, not-"</p><p>"NOTHING HAPPENED! God, I can't take this anymore! I'm done! Have Hanji question her!" Turning on his heel he storms back in the other direction, leaving a very confused Erwin behind. He hears loud music blaring from his quarters, and entering is greeted with a singing, dancing Heather. 'oh I do NOT need this right now...fuck.'</p><p>"I put a spell on youuuu becauuuse you're miiine..." I'm singing along and swaying suggestively to the music while dusting his quarters. He's watching intently, and transfixed by the sway of my hips. When the song is over, he realizes with a start he was standing there gawking the whole time. 'you just can't help yourself can you, bitch?' He walks over and turns my music off. I stop, startled and turn around to look at him.</p><p>"No more noise. I need to work. And stop that ridiculous dancing, you look like you're trying to earn pay."</p><p>"Excuse me?"</p><p>"You heard me."</p><p>"I'm sorry, find it distracting do you?"</p><p>"No", he says simultaneously thinking 'yes.' I turn my back, and putting my headphones in instead, continue to dance anyway. 'damn her...tease'. He sits at his desk and starts looking through the numerous reports.</p><p>Unfortunately, the reports don't hold as much interest as the spectacle he's watching instead. Red-faced, Levi tries to loosen the death grip he has on his pen. He forces himself to look at the paperwork on his desk.</p><p>"but you think that it's just me teasing you...you got a reaction", I'm singing again. He looks up and finds me glaring over my shoulder at him. 'why do you have to fuck with me like this, just once I'd like to get a reaction out of you, you bitch.'</p><p>Levi's Journal: Fuck, does EVERYONE know about the Heather experiment? Fucking cadets are going to get the shit kicked out of them...especially Jean. "I'll gladly take his place"???? Like hell you will you little shit. There I go again. Why do I even care? She seems to like horses, maybe the two of them would be perfect for each other. Save me some agony.</p><p>If I catch him so much as looking at her....</p><p>And then I come home to this. How the hell am I supposed to get anything done with her wiggling around like that? I've been working on the same damn report for a half hour because of her distracting 'dancing'. I should be halfway done with this pile!</p><p>Sometimes I wonder if she's doing this on purpose. Some way to fuck with my head. Well, if that's the case it's working. Unfortunately well.</p><p>Heathers Journal: Everytime I turn around, he's staring at me. What the heck, do your damn paperwork so I don't have to deal with your crabby ass at two in the morning. All I was doing was listening to my music and cleaning. 'Stop that heather, I've got a giant stick up my ass and I've grown quite attached to it' 'quit dancing like that heather you look like you're trying to earn pay' wow he was so close to getting punched. 'I'm levi and I hate fun'. How'd I get stuck with him of all people? Is this hell?</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Nightmare</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>He sits up in bed, heart pounding and sweating. Taking a deep shuddering breath, he covers his face in his hands. "What the hell was that shit?!!!!?"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Later that night: (He's in a cage, and unsure how he got there. Exploring his surroundings, he can't seem to find a door out and he appears to be alone. He hears Hanji's voice, but cannot see her, or anything past his immediate surroundings.</p><p>"Let's see how he reacts when we add this." She says, and Heather appears in the cage with him, looking scared and confused.</p><p>"No! Not this bitch! I hate her!", he yells grabbing the bars of his cage. Suddenly another Levi appears outside his cage. Holding a clipboard and wearing a lab coat, he gazes steadily into the cage.</p><p>This other Levi just rolls his eyes at him and says "Tch. Whatever dumbass."</p><p>"He's avoidant dismissive, what did you expect?" Another Heather, in a similar coat and also carrying a clipboard appears next to the other him. 'Levi' wraps his arm around 'Heather', who is writing on her clipboard as they continue to observe.</p><p>'what is going on?' he thinks looking from one to the other. Hanji approaches with a long needle and is heading straight for his version of Heather and starts to reach into the cage...</p><p>"Don't hurt her! I still need to see what's in her backpack!"</p><p>Hanji ignores him, and the other Levi speaks up. "What's in her backpack isn't important...what's in yours??" He asks, tapping his forehead meaningfully with his finger.</p><p>"I don't know what you mean! Explain!"</p><p>The 'other' Levi rolls his eyes again and holds up a finger as if to silence him. "Pay attention dumbass, this is going to be important." As Levi watches, the other him grabs his own version of Heather and kisses her. They continue to kiss, and with hands exploring each other passionately they slowly sink from view. The sight of them is replaced by darkness and the sound of his heart beating.</p><p>He awakens in his bed, with Heather lying snuggled against him. She opens her eyes and looks at him.</p><p>"You need to get laid, Levi." He looks at her in surprise then notices that Levi, Hanji and Heather are all standing at the foot of his bed watching them. His version of Heather is either unaffected by their presence or doesn't notice they are there.</p><p>"Do we all understand what the problem is?" Hanji says.</p><p>"This experiment is getting nowhere." The other Levi says with a disappointed sigh.</p><p>"Maybe we should pull the plug." The other Heather says, and they all start reaching towards the sleeping Heather, trying to grab her away.</p><p>Panicking, he tries to slap their hands away, but it's no use. "Give her back! Give her back! Give her ba-") </p><p>He sits up in bed, heart pounding and sweating. Taking a deep shuddering breath, he covers his face in his hands. "What the hell was that shit?!!!!?"</p><p>Levi's journal: What in the everlasting hell was that dream?? Now she's invading my depressingly small window of sleep too? FUCK! I need to avoid her as much as possible. Maybe I'll have her stay here in the quarters and clean everyday instead of come with me during training. The less I have to see her the better, right? "Give her back"? No! Take her please! This is a nightmare, it has to be.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Losing Control</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>'Damn it, she's taken control of EVERYTHING! my quarters, my routine, my dreams, ME.... I can't TAKE this shit any longer!'</p>
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    <p>Two days later:</p><p>"No", Levi says exiting his room and walking past me. "You can stay here and clean"</p><p>I sit down pissed. Not giving him the satisfaction of an answer, I lie down and grab my book instead. He walks over, grabs the book, and pulls it down to look me in the eyes.</p><p>" You can do whatever you want, as long as you clean first."</p><p>"This is the most boring place I've ever been. And this place is fucking spotless already. I clean twice a day because that's literally all I CAN do."</p><p>"It's clean when I say it's clean, not before. Stop being a bitch and do what is asked of you."</p><p>"If you quit being a little prick, maybe I would." After several moments of a stare down neither of us win, he rolls his eyes and heads out the door. Looking back just before the door closes, he sees me lie back down on the couch; of course, with my damn book.</p><p>I'm too pissed to read now. Standing up, I begin pacing the room. 'he is SUCH an ASSHOLE! Does it even occur to him that it's his own behavior that sets me off? Fuck! I don't care what he says. I'm getting out of this god forsaken hole NOW." I storm out, and look down the hall, making sure no one is around. Finding the hall deserted, I head for the staircase.</p><p>I make it out of the barracks without incident, and head down the street actually kind of excited for the adventure. The shops and vendors are all so interesting, and not something I'm used to. Stopping at each one, I wish I was able to make at least a purchase or two. The people are friendly and I enjoy the conversation. The last shop I enter is full of paintings, furniture and other odds and ends. Browsing contentedly, I fail to notice a short, portly man approach.</p><p>"Do you have credit with us, dear lady? Most the scouts do; INCLUDING Captain Levi!", he states proudly.</p><p>'oh, does he? well i'm glad I grabbed his cloak before I left, or this wonderful opportunity would never have fallen in my lap' I turn, and smile sweetly at the gentleman. "That's actually why I'm here good sir. The good captain has requested that I come and purchase some new decor for his quarters. He is terribly busy and extends his regrets in being unable to enjoy your fine establishment himself."</p><p>"W-w-well, I have t-to say this is most unprecedented.", he stammers. "Usually I only apply credit on purchases face-to-face."</p><p>I sigh. "I understand, good sir, I only hope the Captain is in a very good mood upon his return...he was SO looking forward to me having this all taken care of..." I turn to walk away.</p><p>"W-wait! Just what are you looking to purchase for our good captain?" Smiling, I point out the items that interest me the most and the shop owner proceeds to call his assistants over to begin preparing it for transfer to the barracks. 'I can't believe that was so easy! Oh he is going to be furious!' Grinning to myself, I thank the shop keeper and head back to the barracks, thankful that my sense of direction serves me well enough to get back quickly. Decorating is relaxing, and after I'm done I do a quick clean before settling into my new ottoman to continue reading my book.</p><p>About a half an hour later I hear the door snick open, and Levi enters. Keeping my eyes on my book, yet with him in my peripheral vision, I act like nothing is amiss. He stands in the center of the room, taking in the curtains, soft throws adorning his couch, plants, paintings. Red faced and fists clenched he whirls in my direction.</p><p>"What the fuck did you do? What is all this shit?"</p><p>"I cleaned like you asked, what's the problem?", I state as sweetly as I can. He storms towards his bedroom without saying a word. Finding nothing amiss in his room, he heads to the bathroom. Burgundy lace shower curtain, thick luxurious bath rug, more plants and paintings....storming back into the living room he shouts,</p><p>"What the fuck did you do?"</p><p>"Anything I wanted. That's what you said. AND I cleaned, like you ALSO said."</p><p>He snarls in frustration and leaves, slamming the door behind him. I smirk and go back to my book. I can hear him downstairs screaming in Erwin's office but cannot make out what he's saying. 'oh, I'm sure i'm going to find out...'</p><p>Levi's Journal: Erwin wants me to get supplies for the upcoming expedition and bird nose wants some more shit for all her pet projects. Since when did I become a fucking errand runner? Do they not see I'm already up to my eyeballs in shit? Including the fucking thorn in my side? According to the Commander, this expedition is finally going to turn things around. I call bullshit. He's said the same thing for the last four missions.</p><p>gun powder</p><p>meal tickets</p><p>black tEa</p><p>Shitty glasSes forMula</p><p>WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE FUCKING DO TO MY ROOM? How did she get all that stupid ass girly shit in here? What the fuck? That's it. I've had enough of that shit. Erwin better have shitty glasses look after this fucking bitch. Not even extra black tea is worth the shit I'm dealing with having this asshole follow me around. I'm done. FUCKING DONE.</p><p>Working with Hanji? I'm not fucking stupid Erwin. This tick is still going to be buried in my fucking side. Whatever. She thinks she's calling the fucking shots but I'll show her who's calling the fucking shots. Bitch.</p><p>Heather's Journal: So apparently this is what following Levi around entails. I just sit here. Doing nothing. Staring at his blank ass white walls, his boring white curtains, plain ass lumpy couch...I could vomit better atmosphere than this. Does this guy have absolutely no personality? I wonder if I can sneak out while he's gone and find something to brighten my day at least a little. At least until the soul sucking little troll comes back.</p><p>He storms back into his quarters and stops about a foot away from me. "You are a fucking bitch." </p><p>"And you are an insufferable asshole", I respond calmly.</p><p>He is furious, and I can see him shaking. 'Damn it, she's taken control of EVERYTHING! my quarters, my routine, my dreams, ME.... I can't TAKE this shit any longer!' He thinks as he steps forward, and I think he's about to hit me, but instead he grabs me by the shirt and slams me into the walI. Sharp pain and stars follow as I try to get my bearings. There's a moment of shock, and then his lips are on mine. I shove him off of me, and stare at him for a moment or two unable to process the situation, then I shove him, grabbing him by the shirt and kiss him back. I'm pushed up against the wall again, as the kiss continues. His hands sliding down my hips, he grabs me and pulls me tightly against him, wrapping my leg around his waist. 'Who does he think he is? and why can't I say no?' Running my hands up his chest, I pull him even tighter, and feel the buttons on his shirt go flying. Disengaging the kiss, his mouth is now seeking my throat, sucking and nipping at the soft, yielding flesh. It seems like an eternity passes before we shove each other away. We are both panting and glaring daggers at each other.</p><p>'I need to get away from him. I need to think!' I lock myself in the bathroom, and I can hear him slamming stuff around in the kitchen. After a bit I can discern the sound of tea being made. Realizing eventually that I can't avoid this creep forever, I come out of the bathroom and he brushes quickly past me towards his room.</p><p>He doesn't look at me, but stops and says "You will be working with Hanji from now on. Erwin wants to see your car up and running by the next mission. You will however stay here until other living arrangements can be made." Without another word, he goes into his room and shuts the door.</p><p>I lie down, trying to slow down my racing mind. 'I'd have rather he punched me', I think angrily.</p><p>Levi's Journal: Probably stupid move, but it was entertaining to see her shitty face after. It was like I said. She's a fucking bitch because she doesn't know what the fuck is going on. What a joke. She locked herself in the bathroom and now I can't shit, so I guess I'll make tea. My extra rations are starting to build up. I'll tear some of this ridiculous shit down too. Except for the blankets. I hate to admit it, but they're pretty soft. Softer than any blanket I've had. Seriously, where did she get this shit? Why did she have to kiss me back?</p><p>Heather's Journal: If anything good came from all this, at least I'm being allowed to spend my days working with Hanji. She has some interesting ideas, and I feel she will be able to grasp the concept of the mechanical side of my vehicle with no trouble. Downside is I'm still tethered to the old ball and chain in the evening. I have to laugh at the new meaning that old phrase has been given. Shit. I didn't ask for this. And I certainly didn't ask for what came next. In the future, that putrid little shit better keep his tongue, hands and tiny penis out of my personal space. He fucking kissed me! What the fuck was he thinking?! Was this his pathetic attempt to win some power struggle? Oh but then my brilliant ass kisses him back. Fucking smart blondie, fucking smart. What point was proven? Neither of us gave any fucking ground, nobody won, and now shit is going to be even worse around here. I admit though, as always I got some measure of satisfaction watching him lose his precious self control. I hope it was as disgusting for him as it was for me. We are both too damn stubborn for our own good.</p>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Aftermath</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>'why does she fuck with my mind like this? i can't focus on my damn job with her lying there looking like she's begging for something....'</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>'She's got some very pretty legs...I wonder...no! Dammit Levi, you have work to do.....but look at her, having them wrapped around me last night was like...' Frustrated, Levi turns his attention back to the report in front of him. 'standard formation....let's keep Ness' squad in reserve...god, does she have to lay there looking so seductive? why don't she just go play with her stupid car instead of toying with me??? (kissing her flashes through his mind)...focus. Ness' squad in reserve...(she kisses him back)...three up front with me...why did I kiss her? why the hell did she kiss me back? All I needed was that one kiss to throw her off, then she HAD to go and kiss me back, and that only made ME want ti kiss her MORE! And look at her damn neck...what the hell was I thinking? If she didn't hate me before, she definitely does now....and everyone is going to see that, too. At the time, I wanted her to walk around humiliated. Now, I just wish it didn't happen.' Sighing, he goes back to the report in front of him. 'why does she fuck with my mind like this? i can't focus on my damn job with her lying there looking like she's begging for something....'</p><p>Lying on the couch, one leg thrown over the back I have my nose buried in a book. Desperately clinging to the words on the pages before me, I flip to the next page furiously reading in order to keep my mind off the night before. 'is he staring at me? i feel like i'm being watched.' I peek quickly over the top of the book, and meeting his eyes, look back down feeling my cheeks turn flaming red. 'can't he go yell at some cadets and leave me the hell alone? I wish he'd stop looking at me like that. I don't exactly dislike it, but I certainly don't want it either.' Getting up, I give him a cold look before walking out the door. 'hm. judging from the look on his face, I think he's more focused on last night than his work. Good. Let him dwell on it. Little troll....'</p><p>He sighs. 'thank god she's gone now. Now maybe i can (throwing her up against the wall, he kisses her)...no, apparently I can't catch a break. maybe I should just go work out. Maybe that will ease some of this tension.' Entering the training room, Levi is greeted by several cadets sparring. They stop, staring at him with knowing smirks on their faces. 'great.' "You, cadets...leave." They turn and rush out whispering to each other. Focusing on the punching bag in front of him, he let's himself vent. </p><p>'shouldn't of done that.' </p><p>PUNCH! </p><p>'shouldn't of kissed her.' </p><p>PUNCH!</p><p>(image of her ripping his shirt open) </p><p>KICK! </p><p>'laid, Levi. screwed.' </p><p>PUNCH! </p><p>'what a bitch!' </p><p>KICK! </p><p>'Erwin needs to find somewhere else for her. I can't do this much longer, can't look at her without thinking about her damn lips...' </p><p>KICK KICK PUNCH! </p><p>'are you offering? geez, did I have to go and say that?' </p><p>PUNCH! </p><p>'if it means i'll get some sleep tonight..stupid bitch' </p><p>KICK PUNCH PUNCH! </p><p>'fricken ruined my shirt...that was HOT...no it wasn't! it was annoying' </p><p>KICK KICK PUNCH! </p><p>'oh, levi! we can mate! Almost fucking did you bitch!' Grabbing the bag, Levi takes a few steadying breaths. 'why can't I stop thinking about this?'</p><p>Levi's Journal: I can't stop thinking about this. I can't look at the stupid bitch without thinking about last night. Kissing her, touching her...her hands on me.... How far would've last night went if neither of us were able to back down?</p><p>And just what the hell is she wearing? Look at her! I can see her legs all the way up to her thighs! What kind of place does she live that it's perfectly okay to walk around half naked? Inappropriate!</p><p>I guess after last night I really don't have any right to talk about what's appropriate and what's not though, do I? That really was a stupid move. Those legs....</p><p>Fuck!</p><p>Heathers Journal: WHY WON'T HE STOP STARING AT ME????? And last night!!!! Why can't I stop thinking about this? What on earth was he thinking? What was I thinking? Why would I let him touch me like that?! Why did I let him?? Why???</p>
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<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Living Arrangements</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"You're angry with a lot of people for a myriad of reasons everyday. I don't see anyone else running around with HICKEYS all over their necks." Face reddening, he looks away again focusing on me.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The days pass without much incident as we have been avoiding each other like the plague since then. A car bay was erected to store my car in, and I spend all my time there, or with Hanji. I usually stay well past him going to bed so I don't have to see him.</p><p>Listening to music, and hiding out. This is what I do now. Hanji is entertaining though, and her endless stream of questions doesn't bother me in the least. I wonder if they'd let me sleep down here? My car is not running, and I'll be damned if I leave without it, so what are these people worried about? I'm certainly not going anywhere. </p><p> Levi wakes up, and comes into the livingroom to check on me. 'not that I care if she's sleeping or maybe if the gods are kind, strangled herself with one of her fucking blankets'. He doesn't see me sleeping on the couch. Irritated, he goes out to find me. He can hear music coming from my car bay and starts to head in that direction.</p><p>"Levi!" Hanji rushes up to intercept him before he can enter. Looking past her, he watches me while I dance around my car, washing it and singing. Ignoring the pang in his chest, he turns to Hanji.</p><p>"Hanji, I've been hearing talk..."</p><p>"Oh? And what talk would that be?"</p><p>"Does she have feelings for me?"</p><p>"She does not like to talk about you. At. All. I honestly don't know. Although, I'm curious about the other end of this talk.."</p><p>"What do you mean, Hanji."</p><p>"Oh, if you've heard that much of the talk, you've heard this too."</p><p>"I do NOT have feelings for her, Hanji. She disgusts me."</p><p>"Really? I'm sure that's exactly what was going through your mind when you left all those love marks all over her neck." She says, voice dripping with sarcasm. "I told you, you only hate her because you like her more than you care to admit."</p><p>Taken aback, he protests. " That's not true! And I was angry."</p><p>"You're angry with a lot of people for a myriad of reasons everyday. I don't see anyone else running around with HICKEYS all over their necks." Face reddening, he looks away again focusing on me.</p><p>"Levi, you came from the underground to the surface. Two different worlds, sure. But still YOUR world. She doesn't have that. She's lost, and she certainly doesn't want to be here. This is not her world. All you do is treat her like shit, and make her feel miserable. Of course she's defiant. Everything she knows has been ripped from her, and you add insult to injury by trying to take her pride?"</p><p>He ignores the comment, simply stating "I'm going to talk to her about this nonsense."</p><p>Hanji bars his way again. "No. What you're going to do is leave her alone. Sort YOURSELF out. Oh, and while you're at it, you might want to work on your bullshit skills. You two are absolutely crazy about each other, it's just both of you are too stupid to realize it."</p><p>He sighs, gives Hanji a glare, and heads back upstairs with one final glance in my direction. 'fuck. what a god damn mess. why did Erwin have to assign this woman to me in the first place. None of this probably would have happened otherwise', he tells himself albeit with a small sense of uncertainty. 'no. it DEFINITELY wouldn't of happened'.</p><p>Levi's journal: Finally some fucking silence. Maybe shitty glasses idea of building that stupid machine storage place wasn't such a shitty idea after all. Although, it's fucking annoying how that girl stomps around at night. Fucking always wakes me up. Like I can't get enough sleep as it is with this shitty insomnia. What is she even doing all day in that ridiculously large building. I'm supposed to know, aren't I? I'll have to check it out one of these days. Hopefully bird nose isn't wasting all of the legions time and resources just to fuck around doing nothing. This better not be another fucking "experiment".</p><p>People have been talking. Normally I don't give two shits, but since her and I seem to be the popular topic, it's caught my attention. Why the hell would I ever have feelings for someone as annoying as her? The scouting legion is no place to be fucking around, but these stupid ass recruits do it all the fucking time anyway. God. But I wonder if what they're saying about her is even remotely true. Music coming from the bay? Sounds like a fucking lie. Feelings for me? Yeah right. The bitch can't stand me and I know it. I don't give a fuck. At least she's not like every other kiss ass that tries to get recruited to my squad. Fuck them. </p><p>Heather's Journal: I'm at my happiest when I'm in the bay with my car. I feel Hanji and I are making some good progress, and it won't be long before I'm able to get outside these damn walls. I'm spinning my wheels here, and I don't like it. I further don't like the feeling that I'm contributing nothing. So I do all I can do and keep doing what I love, and take care of the final gift my father gave me. Oh daddy, would I be in this mess if you were still alive? I guess the answer would be yes, but I know if he was still here he would be moving heaven and earth to get me out of this hell. Daddy I love and miss you so much and I promise to always look after your car. Always.</p><p>One Week Later:</p><p>"I want to sleep down by my car." I turn from the window to look at Levi, hoping that he agrees. He looks up from his paperwork, shocked, surprised and a flash of panic on his face before he closes up before me, with his usual irritating neutral look on his face.</p><p>"Absolutely not." Heart thudding, Levi clutches his pen tightly hoping his anxiety isn't showing on his face.</p><p>"Why Levi? I thought you wanted me gone."</p><p>Going back to his paperwork, he mutters dismissively. "As much as it pains me to say it, you're staying with me."</p><p>"Cuz Erwin said so?"</p><p>"Yes. Cuz Erwin said so."</p><p>"I bet you only wipe your ass how Erwin specifically instructs you, too." I say, plopping down on the couch defeated. "Where could I possibly go? I'm not leaving without my car. Think. I'VE thought it through, believe me. I'm stuck here."</p><p>Sighing he gets up and sits down next to me, bringing his paperwork with him. I scoot away, keeping as much distance as possible. "You're safer here than if you were out there. I've told you this before. You would be locked up, with no access to your precious car whatsoever."</p><p>"I AM locked up...and I'm not asking to go out there, I'm asking to stay in the car bay."</p><p>"No, and I'm not arguing about this with you."</p><p>"But..."</p><p>"Did you know Eren is a titan shifter?'</p><p>"He what??" I turn to face him, startled by the change in subject.</p><p>"The military police held him for trial. If they had their way, he'd be dead. It was Erwin and I that kept him alive. I want you to think about that." With that, he settles back, and begins reading one of the numerous reports sitting in front of him.</p><p>'a titan shifter?...fits his attitude...' I giggle, and Levi glances over raising an eyebrow at me. I shake my head dismissively and he goes back to his report. 'maybe I'm better off here like he said after all...' Grabbing my book, I settle in to read. "Hey, can you go back to your desk maybe? I'd like to lie down."</p><p>"So lie down. Do you see the size of this report? I'm not sitting at my desk for this", he says not looking up.</p><p>"Alright then." I drop my legs unceremoniously in his lap, and open my book. He glances over at me irritated, and I shrug.</p><p>"If you didn't throw my ottoman away, I'd sit there instead."</p><p>"What ARE you reading anyway, Heather?"</p><p>"A scary story." I peek over the top of my book, eyebrow raised.</p><p>"Don't we have enough scary shit as it is? And you want to read about it on purpose?"</p><p>"Scariest thing I've encountered since getting here is your attitude in the morning."</p><p>"You're so funny Heather, it's killing me."</p><p>"Great! I'm going to joke you to death! No one will ever suspect foul play..."</p><p>"Tch, read your stupid book...and where did you even get that?"</p><p>"Backseat of my car...probably have more in my trunk, I should look one of these days....here, try this...better than your stupid report." I toss another book on top of his report, and he picks it up, reading the cover.</p><p>"IT, by Stephan King...what's it about?"</p><p>"Just read it...or would you rather try this one?" Eyebrow raised, I hold up the book i'm currently reading. He leans closer to read the cover.</p><p>"Insomnia...tch no thanks. I deal with that nightmare all the time as it is." Opening the book, he begins to read.....</p><p>One hour later.... 'ugh, why does it have to be a clown?...god....'</p><p>"LEVI!"..."LEVI!"</p><p>"Huh? what's the matter?"</p><p>"Levi, what are you doing?"</p><p>"Reading, isn't it obvious?"</p><p>"Can you keep your hands on the book maybe?" He looks down, and pulls his hand back as if burned. Throwing the book down, he shoves my legs away, stands up and takes his report over to his desk. 'I was distracted....I wasn't rubbing her stupid leg because I wanted to...damn woman and her stupid distractions.......</p><p>Levi Journal: I can't say I blame her, I want to get away from me too. But she can't, and it's not like I can tell her the real reason why...and it's such a selfish reason, really. I don't want her to go. She's a bitch, she's annoying, but I'm used to having her around. And then there's the other things that I simply don't want to address. I'm still frustrated about what happened the other night, so focusing my thoughts on kiss related issues seems like it would only make what I'm feeling worse. I don't think that would be good for either of us right now. So I'm trying to get along with her, and it seems like a successful endeavor so far, but it brings me to my next problem.</p><p>We were on the couch reading and she had her damn pretty legs in my lap. This book she gave me to read is really good (clowns though, seriously childhood nightmare fuel right there) and I don't know when it started I was so wrapped up in the story, but next thing I know she's basically telling me to get my hands off of her. My hand was halfway up her thigh! Fuck, how embarrassing! And it wasn't just resting there, no of COURSE not. I was practically mapping out my (potential?) territory. I had to get away from her then, I just had to.</p><p>Dumb bitch shouldn't be putting her shit in my space anyway, right? Is she seriously asking for it? I'm getting pissed again.</p><p>Heathers Journal: If he hadn't thrown the ottoman out, I would've been safe from his wandering hands last night. Seriously, what's gotten into him, we were just on the couch reading, no big deal right? Nope, apparently a big deal because it seems like I can't be in his vicinity without him wanting to grope me, GOD! I guess I shouldn't have put my legs in his lap, but he was in my way and I'm so stupidly stubborn. Is it me? My fault? I feel sick to my stomach. I even tried to convince him to let me sleep down by my car. He won't let me! Erwin says...blah blah blah. Yeah, right. I bet if I went to Erwin and asked the same thing and gave him my reasoning he would see the logic in my request and tell me it would be fine as long as I didn't go outside of the barracks without Levi (of course). But Levi? Nope. You're staying right here Heather. You would THINK he would be all for finding a way to get me out of his hair, right? Wrong. I don't know what to do anymore. I want to be angry and all offended and righteous about it, but the fact is I think the real reason I'm bothered by all this sudden attention is that, help me please; I actually don't mind him touching me that much....Things would be better between us if we weren't forced into this stupid situation. I know it, he knows it. He tells me he wants me gone all the time. So why won't he let me go???? I wonder....</p><p>This is getting rather lengthy and I don't want to follow my reasoning any farther for fear of where it might go. I'm going to bed, and hopefully I can avoid him as much as possible tomorrow.</p>
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<a name="section0014"><h2>14. The Backpack Pt. 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"I'll bring it in, just lie down." I'm already asleep by the time he comes in. Rolling his eyes, he places the tray on the nightstand and hands in his pockets, watches me sleep for a couple minutes before turning and walking away.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Three days Later:</p><p>Levi comes out of his room, yawns and stretches. Going into the kitchen he reaches for the tea pot only to realize it's empty. Rolling his eyes, he turns to look at me. "Why is there no tea?"</p><p>Ignoring his question, I instead inform him in a dry raspy voice "Hanji wants to see you." COUGH! SNIFF.</p><p>"What's wrong, you sound like shit."</p><p>"I'm fine."</p><p>"No, you're sick."</p><p>"Just let me sleep." Heaving a sigh, he walks over to the couch and starts to lean over.</p><p>'the fuck is he doing?' I shrink back into my pillow trying to avoid him. He reaches under me, grabs hold and picks me up.</p><p>Carrying me to his bedroom, he says "You will not leave this bed until you are better. I'll bring you some soup later."</p><p>"But Levi, what if I have to go to the bathroom?"</p><p>"Don't be a smart-ass.", he says dropping me unceremoniously on the bed. He tosses the blanket over me, and walks out without another word. COUGH! SNIIIIFF. He rolls his eyes and heads out for the rest of the day. COUGH! SNIIIF! cough.</p><p>Several hours Later:</p><p>"Hey Heather, I brought you some tasteless gruel!....Heather?? You're favorite kind....?" He hears a loud gasp come from the bathroom. "Hey are you okay in there?"</p><p>"GLURK!"</p><p>"Good grief are you throwing up now, too?" He opens the door." I swear if you get me sick too I- GLURK!" He throws his hand over his mouth suppressing his own gag at the sight. I find myself giggling at his reaction, despite my own predicament.</p><p>"Please go GLURK! somewhere else Le-GLURK! Levi. GLUUURK!" Gasping, I wipe a shaky hand over my mouth.</p><p>"Good grief woman, you're going to get it in your hair!" He walks over and sits next to me on the floor, taking my hair from my grasp and pulling it away from me.</p><p>"Thank goodness it's not diarrhea, Levi."</p><p>"No shit."</p><p>I start to giggle again. "No shit? That's funny Levi I-GLURK!"</p><p>Rolling his eyes he shifts my hair to his other hand and runs a washcloth in the sink. Squeezing it out as best as possible, he hands it to me.</p><p>"Clean your disgusting self up."</p><p>"Thanks Levi."</p><p>"Yeah whatever."</p><p>I shakily get to my feet and clean up. My legs are still a little wobbly, and I make it only halfway to the bedroom. Once again he picks me up and carries me to the bed. Thoroughly exhausted, I rest my head on his shoulder.</p><p>"Did I hear something about food?"</p><p>"Are you sure you're up for it after that? Kinda looks like what you just left in my toilet..." Placing me gently on the bed this time, he stands up and gives me a questioning look.</p><p>"Ahhh gruel...magnificent."</p><p>"I'll bring it in, just lie down." I'm already asleep by the time he comes in. Rolling his eyes, he places the tray on the nightstand and hands in his pockets, watches me sleep for a couple minutes before turning and walking away.</p><p>Levi's Journal: She better help me clean up all the shit she leaves once she is fucking better. Disgusting.</p><p>She snores like a fucking cow.</p><p>Better go over the formation plans for the next expedition.</p><p>Heather's journal: Well, I'm coming down with something. This is just great. I'm not going to get anything done feeling like this. At least the environment around this place hasn't been as shitty. Still a jerk, though. I have decided it is my mission to teach this troll how to act like a decent human being. Why do I care? Not sure, but if it will get me through the days with a little bit more sanity, then game on. A challenge. Entertaining notion to say the least.</p><p>"Levi?"</p><p>"Yes?" He says with an audible sigh.</p><p>"My backpack is by the couch. Will you bring it to me?"</p><p>"Your voice sounds worse." Getting up, he walks to the couch and grabs my backpack.</p><p>"Just bring me the backpack will you?"</p><p>"Tch. I'm coming, hold on." He brings me the backpack and then starts to leave. "You actually let me touch your backpack. You really must feel like shit."</p><p>"Hold up Levi." He stands there watching as I unpack my backpack.</p><p>"What's this?" He asks, holding up a leather bound journal. I grab it away.</p><p>"Nothing you need to...ahhh! Here it is." I hand him a packet. "I honestly didn't think I had any of this left."</p><p>"What is it?"</p><p>"Medicine. Just mix it up with hot water and bring it to me please" He leaves and then comes back a moment later with my drink, and the book I was currently reading. He tosses the book on the bed, and hands me the drink.</p><p>"Here", he says sarcastically,"I'd hate for you to get bored. Lord only knows what would happen next." As he turns away I chuckle.</p><p>"You better be nice to me, I might decide to redecorate your bedroom next", while nudging him playfully with my foot.</p><p>"Tch." is all he says and walks out with a roll of his eyes carrying my re-packed backpack with him.</p><p>Levi's Journal: Does this woman go crazy when she gets sick or is she actually not a complete asshole? Whatever she's been drinking must be killing off the rest of her brain cells and fuck! It tastes like shit!</p><p>Hanji said to meet in the mess hall with Erwin and Mike again. If it's another lecture on alternate realities and shit I'm going to have to down some of Moblit's private stock. Fuck me.</p><p>Levi is at his desk doing paperwork. He keeps glancing at the couch, but then shakes his head and returns to work. He stops suddenly, puts his pen down and gets up. Sitting on the couch, he pulls my backpack up next to him and starts looking through my stuff. Extra pants, shirts, blushing furiously he tosses my undergarments onto the couch along with the rest. "Dear God, how is that supposed to cover anything?" he mutters, feeling guilty for having seen them.</p><p>He glances anxiously at the closed bedroom door, worried I might awake at any moment and then continues his search. "What's this?", he says holding a glass bottle. He sniffs, eyebrow raised, then shrugs and tosses the perfume next to everything else. 'so that's the smell that's all over my couch...' he fishes around a bit more until...</p><p>"Ahh, here." He picks up the journal, and again glances at the bedroom door. He opens the journal, and then realizing the privacy of it he closes it just as quickly. He runs his hands through his hair and sighs, glancing at the book. 'do i dare? who knows what's written in there'....</p><p>'no. i should just put it back'.....</p><p>'it's personal and i don't hand her my journal and let her read that'.....</p><p>'why should it be okay for me to read hers?'....</p><p>'does she say anything about me?? I have to know'.....feeling excited and also a little sick to his stomach, he grabs the cover.....</p><p>'ah heck.'... now also feeling like an absolute jerk....</p><p>'what's a hobbit?'...his heart feels like it's plummeting to his feet....</p><p>'she didn't mind???'...his heart soars back into his chest, beating frantically.</p><p>Levi's Journal: How am I supposed to focus when all her shit is sitting right there? For all I know there could be some sort of assassination contract from pastor Nick or some spacey as shit weapon that could change the course of tactics for the scouting legion! What her high as fuck ass doesn't know won't kill her, besides all the trouble I went through to look in this stupid pack...I might as well take advantage of the situation.</p><p>Just clothes and some weird smelling shit. This girl has some freakish fetishes. I didn't know I could feel this disgusted. Her journal is in all this stuff though. Am I an asshole to read it? I won't. I'm not a fucking barbarian! (says the guy who can't stop looking at her underthings!!!)</p><p>20 minutes later.....</p><p>Levi's Journal: Fuck.</p>
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<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Feeling Guilty</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"You didn't happen to order yourself some more shit to decorate my quarters with did you?" He gives me an accusatory look and I laugh.</p><p>"I didn't think of that! Good idea, Levi thank you!"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>'I'm a jerk. I know i can tell myself i had every justification to read her journal, but that still didn't give me the right. So now i'm even more confused and unsure what to make of this woman.' Sighing to himself he throws his pen down in disgust. 'What's worse, is I still want to continue reading the damn thing. Why do i care what she thinks of me? Why do i care that she has such an obvious low opinion of me? And yet, she's nice to me...well, what passes for nice to her I guess and she admitted she didn't mind my hands on her! How does that make me feel? Kind of sick to my stomach, but in a good way. And our behavior towards each other.... it's better than it started anyway...god i wanted her dead! and now....'</p><p>He looks up from his work, which he hasn't even touched. I'm on the couch with my back to him, legs up and crossed on the back of the couch. Tapping my foot to the music he was finally, 'thank god' able to convince me to keep under an ear shattering decibal. He let me come out of the bedroom, as long as I'm lying down, and resting. As soon as I start coughing, I'm usually shooed back into the bedroom, door shut.</p><p>'Germaphobe...' I giggle to myself and stretch, arching back until I'm looking at him upside down. 'why does she always catch me looking...' "Are you done with that paperwork? This book isn't going to read itself you know..."</p><p>"No, I'm not done. This is going to take all night." 'especially considering how hard of a time i'm having focusing...I claim your stupid undergarments made me feel disgusted, but would you like to know what I'm imagining you WEARING right now? Stupid bitch.' Shaking his head at the thought, he continues working.</p><p>"Well, what all do you have to do?"</p><p>"Match these invoices with Hanji's count, and approve some scouting details."</p><p>"Give me the mathy stuff."</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"Just give it here, Levi." He gets up and hands me a sizeable amount of papers, and I lean over to grab my backpack. Rooting around, I fish out my calculator and get to work. "Are you just going to stand there?" Transfixed by this new device, he gives a start and goes back to work. In a half an hour, he's done signing, and looks up to see me waving paperwork at him.</p><p>"All done. This last invoice doesn't match though..." He comes around his desk to sit next to me. "You're going to get cooties Levi...." I say teasingly.</p><p>He just rolls his eyes. "Doesn't match how?"</p><p>"Four boxes of 32 canisters, should be 4x32. Which is 128. Hanji has it down as 120. Did she count wrong? Did the supplies stop somewhere else first and someone helped themselves?"</p><p>"Hmmm. I'm going to find out." He gets up, and heads for the door. "You didn't happen to order yourself some more shit to decorate my quarters with did you?" He gives me an accusatory look and I laugh.</p><p>"I didn't think of that! Good idea, Levi thank you!"</p><p>"Don't you dare!" Coming back a half hour later, he finds me asleep and the invoices on his desk. Giving them a quick look for 'extras', and not finding any he signs off on them quickly. Finding a cadet in the hallway, he gives instructions to send his work to Erwin, and shuts the door. Making his way quietly to the couch, he picks up the book and sits down moving my legs from the back of the couch to his lap. Part 4: Eddie Kasbrack takes his medicine......</p><p>COUGH COUGH COUGH...wheeeze....! Startled, Levi throws the book up but catches it before it hits the floor. 'shit, my page!' "Hey!" POKE "HEY!"</p><p>"Uhhh?" I reply groggily.</p><p>"Go to bed. You're getting your 'cooties' everywhere, dumbass." I get up, and make my way slowly to the bedroom.</p><p>"Germ warfare."</p><p>"What Heather?"</p><p>"Keep calling me dumbass and one of these days I'm going to chase your ass and sneeze at you. Repeatedly." Before he can give an irritated response, an image of himself being chased down the hall by a sneezing Heather flashes through his mind and he has to duck his head so I can't see him on the brink of hysterics.</p><p>"Sh-shut the d-door behind you!" Finding his page, he snorts laughter and begins reading. 'I don't know what's funnier about this image...the look on my own damn face running from the 'cooties', or the look on her face as she's sneezing..." Chuckling outright this time, he turns his attention to the book.</p><p>Levi's Journal: I should have let her keep that extra chair she purchased, then there would be more room for both of us to be comfortable while we're reading. I like how this story jumps around from adulthood and childhood as the "losers" get their memories back! I have to say things are getting more easy around here, with neither of us tip-toeing around the other. The pile of paperwork on my desk is finally gone, and that's all thanks to her, and I'm glad she's getting better because if I get sick I'm ramming my foot up her ass. And honestly, I need to stop thinking about her in her underthings. She's driving me nuts!</p><p>Heather's Journal: I'm feeling somewhat better, but the moment I so much as sneeze it's "Be GONE!!!! To quarantine with you!" Oh for heaven's sake. Things have been a lot more comfortable around here, now that I've managed to get him to comprehend the concept of taking time out to relax. He seems a lot less edgy anyways. And I honestly don't think we've gotten in a serious argument since THE DREADED KISS. Even when I wanted to move out, we didn't really argue about it like normal, it just felt like a mild debate. Geez, is that it? If that's all it took for him to be nice (ish) to me maybe I should have kissed him a long time ago. Wait...no.</p>
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<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Just a Little Fantasy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"let me take care of you"....i would like that very much, Heather....</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Levi wakes up at the sound of the book he's reading hitting the floor. Bolting upright, he is overwhelmed with excruciating pain. "AHHH! FUCK!!!" 'stupid couch...jesus, and I make her sleep on this! why couldn't she of replaced this, too?'</p><p>"Levi?" I call sleepily from the bedroom.</p><p>'shit. I woke her up...' "Go back to sleep Heather." I was already coming out of the bedroom, so his admonishment was useless.</p><p>"What's wrong?"</p><p>"Nothing."</p><p>"Bullshit, I heard you yell."</p><p>"This couch is a piece of shit."</p><p>"Yes, I am aware. What's wrong?"</p><p>"I can't move my neck. Or my stupid shoulders, for that matter."</p><p>"I can help with that..." I put my hands on his shoulders and he jumps, moving away.</p><p>"What are you DOING?"</p><p>I roll my eyes. "Just hold still Levi...it's only a massage."</p><p>"Hea-ow...OW!"</p><p>"Quit squirming, of course it is going to hurt, your muscles feel like fricken tennis balls....it'll get better I promise."</p><p>"What's a tennis ball?"</p><p>"Nevermind, just relax." Kneeling on the couch behind him, I put experimental pressure on his neck. He flinches. 'good grief, you are all sorts of jacked up', I think to myself getting to work. Using long, light stokes I start along the side of his neck and down over his shoulders. Most of his tenseness is self inflicted, it's pretty obvious from the set of his shoulders.</p><p>"Levi, relax...you've been taking care of me the whole time i've been sick...let me take care of you for a change..." I continue, and he seems to finally relax.</p><p>Making an involuntary humming noise, Levi closes his eyes. 'this actually feels pretty good...' Relaxing against me, he lets his head fall to my shoulder. Lulled by the rhythm of my hands, his thoughts drift. ("let me take care of you"....i would like that very much, Heather...."come here Levi"....opening his eyes he sees me standing in the doorway to the bedroom, beckoning...."Levi"....coming to the bedroom, he picks me up and carries me to the bed...I'm on top of him now..."let me take care of you"...'what happened to my clothes?' he wonders illogically, it's HIS fantasy after all...I'm trailing kisses down his neck...his chest...his stomach...."Levi...")</p><p>"Levi?..Levi? Are you with me?" Opening his eyes with a start, he pulls away. I had been working on his upper chest and arms but stop. "Do you feel better?"</p><p>"Yes...thank you." Embarrassed, he stands up.</p><p>"Do you want the bed?"</p><p>"No, I'll be fine. Go back to sleep."</p><p>"Are you sure?"</p><p>"Heather...go...to sleep." Confused by his sudden change in mood, I shut the door leaving him to his thoughts. Flopping back onto the couch, he sighs feeling frustrated and miserable.</p><p>'does she do this shit on purpose? is she even fricken aware at all?'</p><p>'even my own thoughts are full of lies'...</p><p>'I would like that very much?...no!'...</p><p>'that's not what I want at all!..is it?!'</p><p>'it was because she put her hands on me, that's all it was'...</p><p>'it had nothing to do with anything else'...</p><p>he sighs...'I didn't have to let her though, I could've said no or got up and moved but instead I let her put her hands on me instead I sat there and let her'....</p><p>'I enjoyed it'....</p><p>'i don't have time for this shit in my life'....</p><p>'god, how can anyone stand feeling like this, it's awful'</p><p>'Oh who am I kidding? This is exactly what I want.' Letting out a frustrated groan, he rolls over onto his stomach and silently begs for sleep.</p><p>Levi's Journal: Here I am still trying to make excuses for my behavior, my thoughts, my actions. Everything's her fault, at least that's what I keep on saying but I know damn well it's not. And that fucking little fantasy that was playing in my stupid head....inspired by her of course, but it WAS my thoughts and yet I sit here trying to find excuses, and act like I'm just a passenger when I'm the one driving this carriage. I ask myself why was I thinking these things...like I don't already know the answer. Maybe I'm trying to find a way to logic out of this mess, but there's nothing logical about how I feel at ALL.</p><p>I WANT HER! There! I said it!</p><p>Not that it fucking matters.....</p><p>Heather's journal: Impulsive Heather strikes again. I don't know what I was thinking, except that I felt so bad for the poor guy. He was in soo much pain! I get it, that couch of his is like a medieval torture device!! So I gave him a massage, and I'd like to think no big deal right? Apparently wrong. He seemed so mad all of a sudden and I don't understand why. I can't begin to imagine what I could of possibly done wrong...maybe next time I should just put the pillow over my ears and ignore him? But that's so mean!! And I did want to make up for him having to do practically everything for my sick ass lately.....what was going on in that complicated brain of his that made him decide 15 minutes later that Heather did something wrong and deserves to be yelled at????</p>
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<a name="section0017"><h2>17. A Night Out</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Is that the master plan, Levi? To bore me to death? I need to get outside. I can't just be cooped up here all the time."</p>
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    <p>After a couple days in bed, I feel I'm ready to join the land of the living. Looking around I realize I should clean up after myself. Ugh, first thing first....a shower. I shower quickly, gasping at the cold water. Once I'm dressed I decide that his blankets and pillows need a good wash too. I've been lying sick on them for a couple days now, and I certainly wouldn't appreciate my bed stuff left like this either.</p><p>Coming back with fresh, clean linens, I feel even better. It's nice to be up and moving. I'll make his bed, and maybe do some more cleaning. 20 minutes later: *fooled around and fell in love, by Elvin bishop*</p><p>Levi hears singing coming from his quarters. Rolling his eyes he opens the door, and then just leans against the doorframe arms folded watching the scene before him. I'm up on a step ladder washing windows. He shuts the door and walks up behind me.</p><p>"Why are you out of bed?" I don't answer but continue to sing and clean. He repeats the question, then looks closer at me. He sees a metal rectangular object on my hip with long tendrils reaching up to my ears. 'her headset..I see...' He pulls one away and says my name again. I scream, jump and losing my balance, begin to fall.</p><p>"Oh shit!" he exclaims and catches me. After a moment I place my hands on his shoulders and burst out laughing.</p><p>"Jesus Levi! You scared the crap out of me! What do you want?"</p><p>"Why are you out of bed?"</p><p>"I feel better."</p><p>"You don't sound better."</p><p>"I know, but I do feel better and I have way too much energy to just lie in bed."</p><p>"Well I feel that until you are 100% you should stay in bed."</p><p>"Is that the master plan, Levi? To bore me to death? I need to get outside. I can't just be cooped up here all the time."</p><p>"Fine. How about a tour of the walls?"</p><p>I grin from ear to ear. "Absolutely." Blushing fiercely I add " Also as far as your master plan goes....if this is part of it okay, but if holding me is NOT part of the plan, maybe you could remove your arms from around me?"</p><p>He looks down and realizes that he's still holding me. Blushing madly, he let's go and stutters out an apology.</p><p>"All good, Levi. Just let me see if I have something warm to put on it's a bit chilly looking out there...oh and I took the liberty of washing your blankets and stuff, too." I toss casually over my shoulder as I grab my backpack.</p><p>"You know, if you would actually wear clothes that cover your whole body you probably wouldn't be so cold all the time...and thanks."</p><p>"Gee Levi, I guess I should have planned this trip a little...wait. That's weird."</p><p>"What's weird?"</p><p>"Everything in my backpack is like completely disorganized. I never leave my pack this much of a mess."</p><p>He turns abruptly away so I can't see his very red, guilty face. "Here." he says, tossing me his cloak. "Just wear this."</p><p>Levi's Journal: Commander Erwin said to inform Heather of our upcoming expedition so I guess she will be part of the scout regiment as far as that asshole is concerned. I wonder if Erwin ever stops to think about the backlash this is going to cause. Once the news gets out everyone is going to flip their shit and demand her and her car be locked up. Not to mention the military police up our ass again. It was fucking bad enough with Eren, but now all this? God! I guess once she gets better and cleans up her own shit storm I can show her the walls. "treat her like a new recruit" he said. Yeah sure. A new recruit that sleeps in my bed and redecorates my shit with MY CREDIT. And seriously, why did she keep this awful couch??</p><p>God, why does she say such embarrassing things? Is she trying to get a rise out of me? She must be permanently brain damaged from that shitty medicine she drank. Another good question is why do I keep DOING such embarrassing things??!</p><p>Shit I forgot to put her crap back right. I hope she doesn't suspect me. I shouldn't have fucked with her shit. STUPID Levi.</p><p>"These walls are huge, Levi...how can they possibly be monitored for titan activity properly?"</p><p>"That's why we have the districts. Titans gravitate to the more concentrated populations, so that makes it easier to focus our attention where it's needed."</p><p>"Interesting..."</p><p>"You act like this is a new concept. Do you not have walls like this?"</p><p>"No, our cities are not walled."</p><p>"How do you keep titans out?"</p><p>"We have our mechanized anti-titan units, deployable to any location and several other warfare advancements that have been effective. Other humans, other countries...they're more of a threat than titans as of late."</p><p>"Countries?"</p><p>"You don't think your's is the only civilization out there do you?"</p><p>He shrugs. "It's what we've been told..."</p><p>I shake my head. "Levi, I highly doubt it.."</p><p>'what the hell does she know?' Putting his hand on my back he guides me to a set of stairs leading back to the city proper. We walk in silence for a bit before he starts the conversation again. "What do you use besides cars?"</p><p>"Planes, helicopters, paratroopers...."</p><p>"I'm sorry?"</p><p>"Planes are like flying cars. They carry our troops inside them and can get them to drop points quickly..."</p><p>"So they FLY??", he interrupts suddenly interested.</p><p>"Yes, but not exactly like birds. And we don't have ODM gear either. Paratroopers jump out of the plane and freefall. They wear a device called a parachute which when enacted, it slows the speed of descent and the soldier can then spear the titan, bringing themselves in close for a kill." </p><p>He shakes his head, finding all this hard to take in. "Sounds risky."</p><p>"Isn't any of it? no matter what our techniques?...Hey, where does that lead?"</p><p>He bars my way. "That's the underground. We will not be touring that."</p><p>"Why not? What is it?"</p><p>"It's where the city hides it's 'trash'." He says sarcastically.</p><p>"I want to know."</p><p>He sighs, rolling his eyes. "It started as an overflow for people coming into this district, and became a place for crime, prostitution, sick, poor...homeless...you have to 'pay' to get out...therefore, no one ever does."</p><p>"THAT'S SHIT!!!"</p><p>"What Heather, you don't have places for your poor?"</p><p>"YES. Right out where we can see them everyday...not tucked away like a dirty secret!"</p><p>"I don't like it either, and I grew up in it. It is what it is."</p><p>"No one tries to help these people?"</p><p>Frustrated with the conversation, he whirls on me prepared to argue. Instead he stops, shocked by...tears? Is she crying? Unsure what to do, he awkwardly pats my shoulder. 'god, you're smooth Levi...you're patting her shoulder? God you suck.' he thinks to himself wishing he would have taken a different route. "Heather, do you think those pompous assholes in the capitol give a shit? Do you think they'll part with a single dime? No. It's useless."</p><p>"Oh sure, and the magnificent Captain Levi made it out, don't look back right? Never even thought you could maybe use your influence to make a difference?"</p><p>"What could I possibly do?"</p><p>"Anything! As long as you tried something!!!"</p><p>"Heather, can we just go home please?"</p><p>"Sure. At least we have a home, right?"</p><p>'god, how can one person make me feel so many different things? why does she confuse me? make me feel like a piece of shit, and want to kiss her at the same time????'</p><p>Levi's journal: Tonight was actually pretty enjoyable, if you forget the part where she got so upset hearing about the underground. She was crying! I could feel my heart shatter in a million pieces and I fucking hate it! I admire her compassion, but I just don't see anything anyone could possibly do about the situation down there. AND I do NOT want to revisit that shit EITHER! I wanted to comfort her so bad, but how do I do that when I'm not sure how she would receive it? Yeah, I know what she wrote about me touching her, but that's a totally different thing. I don't know if she wants this from me, and to be honest, I don't know if i ever want to tell her I'm there if she wants me in the first place!</p><p>Heather's journal: The underground. That just sounds awful on it's own, never mind the purpose of it. People seriously have to pay to get out and better their lives? I can't even begin to fathom how awful it must be to live there, and let's face it how could I possibly? Spoiled rotten, family vacations all over...heck people here can't even leave the walls without the possibility of getting creamed by a titan. There has to be something that can be done, though. I mean, with enough pressure.....</p><p>And Levi grew up there? How awful, I don't think I'll ever be able to comprehend what it was like for him. I bet it has a lot to do with why he is the way he is though.</p>
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<a name="section0018"><h2>18. "Levi"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>'what am I even doing here? Levi...I want the kitty...Levi it needs food...Levi....be a good slave and say yes to my every request', he thinks sarcastically, paying for the stupid fish and heading back home.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>One Week Later:</p><p>"I have to leave on a mission, so I guess that means you're being left to your own devices for the time being." Levi says upon entering.</p><p>"I heard. Why am I staying behind.?" I glance back from my dusting, curious as to his answer.</p><p>"Until your car is running, I'm not risking you on a mission. Period." He's not risking me?? What does he mean, not risking me?</p><p>"Isn't that Erwin or Hanji's decision, technically?"</p><p>"No." He leaves the room abruptly not showing himself for another 10 minutes. In the meantime, I continue the cleaning I was doing and lightly hum to myself.</p><p>"How was training today?", I call out.</p><p>"Tch. Annoying."</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>Levi re-enters the room. "My cloak smells like your perfume. Miche wouldn't stop sniffing me. Not to mention the cadets all whispering and giggling about it. Thanks a lot."</p><p>"Oh, my pleasure CAPTAIN."</p><p>Levi gives a "Tch", rolls his eyes and sits behind his desk, doing paperwork. Everytime I look up at him, he's looking at me, but glances hurriedly back down at his work.</p><p>"I'm going down to see Hanji now."</p><p>"Good", is all he says so I walk out without another word. I can't help but giggle at his description of his day. 'poor Levi...' (Approaching car bay)</p><p>"But did you see him? He thinks no one saw, but he was CONSTANTLY sneaking sniffs of his cloak! Ahhahahaa! Priceless!"</p><p>"How long do you give it Hanji?"</p><p>"Ahem...give what, exactly?"</p><p>"Oh hi Heather!" Hanje exclaims as both her and Moblit jump up from their chairs. "Do you want to test out this new fuel mixture?"</p><p>"Noooo, I want to know what you were talking about." An awkward silence ensues, with Moblit finally blurting out</p><p>"What's the deal with you and the captain?"</p><p>Hanje kicks him and says "Hey, the local blacksmith should be done with those lifter replicas..."</p><p>"The bearings as well??"</p><p>"Yeah, those too."</p><p>"They can't be created out of just any metal. Please tell me you gave him my diagram and explicit instructions?"</p><p>"Of course!.....So are you going to answer the question?"</p><p>"Bye Hanji." I turn and leave, feeling relieved to be away from those two. 'oh gods, this is kind of funny.....'</p><p>Levi's Journal: Her damn perfume. Why does it smell so fucking good? Everyone noticed it didn't smell like my cleaning supplies and now Miche is all up my ass about Heather. I swear, if he keeps saying Heather and I are "sex buddies" I'm going to kick his nose in so hard he won't be able to smell anymore. I already get enough crap from the recruits. I don't need it from him too. And HANJI. Her and her ridiculous wicked smile is so fucking annoying. She knows I can't kick her ass after the last time she got under my skin so now she does this stupid giggle that sounds more like some gargling constipated cow. So fucking stupid!!</p><p>I'm not risking her?? Did she catch that little slip?? Fuck.</p><p>Heather's journal: Okay, first..what did he mean 'I'm not risking you on a mission'? Second.. yes, that actually IS Hanji and Erwin's call. I do feel bad that he's getting all this shit over my perfume though. If I would have thought of it, I would have refused his cloak and got out a sweatshirt. Still want to know why my backpack was such a mess...</p><p>The Next Day:</p><p>"What are you doing?!" Entering his quarters, Levi finds me hanging half out of his window.</p><p>Startled, I jump and bang my head on the sash. "OW! Dammit, Levi!"</p><p>"Well answer the question. What are you...is that a fucking cat?"</p><p>"He's only a kit, I named him Levi."</p><p>"What the fuck Heather? Why?"</p><p>I giggle. "Because the first time I met him he hissed at me....AND he's adorable!"</p><p>Levi rolls his eyes. "You're NOT bringing that thing in here."</p><p>"Why not? Look at the little guy...he's starving!"</p><p>"He'll piss and shit all over the place!"</p><p>"Not if I give him a box to go in..."</p><p>" And who's going to clean up after it?"</p><p>"I will, of course. Come on, Levi. He's cute and hungry...I'm bored and lonely."</p><p>"Absolutely not! And what the hell do you mean, lonely?"</p><p>"You're not always here, and Hanj isn't always down in the bay...I'm by myself all the freaking time!"</p><p>"No. Stop arguing. I don't want that thing in here."</p><p>"Well can I at least feed him?"</p><p>'Damn it Heather, don't look at me like that', he thinks watching me interact with the kitten. 'If you keep giving me that look I'm going to cave, and since when did you take charge of MY quarters?'. He's sighs. 'Ages ago...'</p><p>"What are you going to feed it?"</p><p>"I can go buy-"</p><p>"No.", he interrupts. "Stay here, I'll be back. And DON'T let it inside." Feeling irritated, Levi heads down to market. Ignoring the occasional greeting, he instead avoids everyone head down, and walks briskly with his hands clenched in his pockets. 'what am I even doing here? Levi...I want the kitty...Levi it needs food...Levi....be a good slave and say yes to my every request', he thinks sarcastically, paying for the stupid fish and heading back home.</p><p>30 Minutes Later: "Heather, could you name that stupid thing something else? How am I supposed to know if you're talking to me or the annoying ball of fur?"</p><p>"If i'm using a sweet baby voice, I'm definitely NOT talking to you." Rolling his eyes, he goes back to work. A few minutes go by, and he glances up seeing me holding the kitten and walking around the living room.</p><p>"I said keep it outside!"</p><p>"He's not roaming around, and my back is killing me from having to lean out the window all the time!"</p><p>"You POOR thing. Do you want a 'massage'?" He says sarcastically. I walk over to the window, putting my kitten outside.</p><p>"Bye Levi...you sweet little cinnamon bun." I scratch his ears, give him a kiss on the head and shut the window.</p><p>'did she just kiss that thing? Does she have any idea how fricken unsanitary that is?' He goes back to his work until he hears me very pointedly clearing my throat. Looking up, he sees me lying on the couch looking at him expectantly. 'what is she waiting for?...I...oh no...Levi you moron' Clearing his throat he gives me an irritated look. "What the hell do you want?"</p><p>"You don't get to back out of this, you offered. Get over here and give me a massage."</p><p>" I have way too much to do to be fucking around with you right now, Heather." I sigh, get up and open the window back up.</p><p>"Heeere kitty kitty!"</p><p>"Shut that damn window and lie down! Damn you Heather!" Shutting the window, i head back to the couch and lie down; grinning in triumph.</p><p>'you are a spoiled brat', he thinks sitting on the edge of the couch.</p><p>15 minutes later: 'Is she asleep? Thank god, my hands were about to fall off'.' Getting up from the couch, Levi looks out the window. 'what do you want, stupid furball...I'm not letting you in.' Annoyed, Levi grabs a book and sits on the end of the couch reading.</p><p>A few moments later, a knock sounds on the door. He nudges me. "Wake up. We have company." Yawning and stretching, I sit up.</p><p>"That was nice, Levi. Thank you."</p><p>"Tch." Levi walks over to the door. 'nice for me too...tempting little brat.'</p><p>"Hi Hanj! And Commander Erwin, what a pleasant surprise!" I exclaim, watching them enter. With a grin and a wave, Hanji comes and joins me on the couch. Erwin gives a polite nod. As we settle in, Hanji looks up and exclaims,</p><p>"Is that a cat?!"</p><p>'dear god, no...' Levi thinks bracing himself for the inevitable.</p><p>"He's my cat. I named him Levi."</p><p>'oh no....', Levi thinks closing his eyes.</p><p>"LEVI????", Hanji exclaims. "You named him LEVI?!" Bursting into hysterical laughter, Hanji runs over and whips the window open.</p><p>"Hanji don't DO that!" Levi yells. Too late, she's already bringing "Levi" to the couch.</p><p>"Awww he's too cute! Look at him, with his glossy black fur, and those big grey eyes...you...are...too...CUTE!"</p><p>"Heather, could you go down to your car and let us discuss whatever we need to discuss?"</p><p>"Sure, Levi." I get up and leave. Surveying the room, Erwin takes in the curtains, rug, paintings and now the kitten that has decided to curl up in his lap. Raising an eyebrow, he absently strokes the kit while turning his attention to Levi.</p><p>"She's definitely livened the place up."</p><p>"She's a pain in the butt.", Levi grumbles.</p><p>"Well, a pain you definitely needed apparently."</p><p>"Like a hole in my head!"</p><p>"No, Levi you already had that.", Hanji says reaching over to tickle the kit under his chin. "Heather just so happens to be the only thing plugging said hole, and stopping all the annoying shit from coming out."</p><p>"Very funny you two, what exactly did you need? Or did you stop by to make me miserable."</p><p>Erwin chuckles. "Honestly, I just wanted to see for myself what she's done to you, and your place. Consider me impressed. If I'd have known what having a woman around would do for you, I would have made this happen a lot sooner." He stands up, places the kit in Levi's lap and heads for the door. Yawning and curling up, the annoying furball falls asleep purring.</p><p>A moment later, Hanji pokes her head back in. "Shall I send your lady back up?" She asks with a wicked grin.</p><p>"Tch. Whatever." Putting the kit back outside, he heads for his room. He's not really tired, he just doesn't want to deal with any shit. 'that woman is taking over my entire life...damn her.'</p><p>Levi rolls over, and slaps at his face. That tickles...annoyed, he rolls over again the blanket up around him. Sharp little claws dig into his back. 'OW!' Sitting up, he looks down to find that somehow that annoying little furball got into his room. 'what the hell?....' His door is shut, but his window is open. "ugh....stupid little kit." The kit just looks at him, wide eyed and head tilted. "Alright, but don't tell Heather." He whispers, scooping the purring bundle up and going back to sleep.</p><p>Levi's Journal: A cat. A fucking cat. She wants to keep the stupid thing. absolutely not. i don't need another annoying shit around here, I already have one spoiled brat and that's about all I can tolerate. Yeah she's spoiled. I just have such a hard time saying no to her! So I'll feed it, but that stupid thing isn't coming in EVER!</p><p>And she named it Levi!!! Seriously?? Well, on the plus side, she called me adorable (by association) and I can deal with that. But then she ignores me and let's the stupid furball inside anyways. I had to give her a massage because my mouth is stupid and I am not going to complain about an opportunity like that, but once again I just about feel like I've distanced myself and she reels me back in like a fish on a hook. Fuck!</p><p>He is kind of cute though. He got in my bedroom window. I guess I can let him sleep with me. Just this once though.....</p><p>Heathers journal: I've got a little buddy now, and I named him Levi. To clarify, he's a little black kitten I found roaming around outside of the living room window. Maybe naming him Levi wasn't the best of ideas, but it suits him and it's funny! Levi, (the grumpy one) doesn't seem to think so, and THAT became another heated debate between the two of us. I want to keep little Levi and he's dead set against it. At least I got him to agree to feed the poor little guy. I swear sometimes the way we argue makes me think of an old married couple, and it's downright hilarious. That is, until I think about my luck and how I probably WILL be here forever....sharing these quarters with a grumpy old fart named Levi. The way things are going I'm sure I'll probably be buried in the same damn coffin as him, too! But haha I can see him now, crusty old Levi tottering around his quarters complaining that he can't find his dentures and bitching about why I leave mine just laying on the counter and how disgusting that is. Then in my little old lady voice I tell him that I'm wearing mine and those are HIS on the counter.....as adorable as that little imagining is, it's also quite depressing.</p>
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<a name="section0019"><h2>19. The Photograph</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Well it was bri....what is this? How?" He takes the photo from me and studies it closely. What he sees is astounding. There he is, eyes closed. Next to him, cheek almost touching his...her. Smiling. "This moment has been captured forever?"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>(Crimson and Clover, Joan Jett) I'm down in the bay by myself, listening to my mix and tinkering with my car. Dancing and singing I spin around towards my toolbox and bump right into Levi.</p><p>"What ARE you doing, dumbass?"</p><p>"Ritual dancing to appease the Car Gods." "The....car gods?" He asks cautiously. I sneakily push the panic button on my key fob causing the alarm to blare. Grabbing his arms I yell "Oh no Levi, the car gods are angry and demand a sacrifice!"</p><p>He jumps and his eyes widen. and I bust out laughing and shut the alarm off; showing him my key fob.</p><p>"Just kidding. Here, look. This button locks the doors, this one as you just discovered scares the shit out of people, and this one unlocks it. I open the driver's side, get in and lay my seat back.</p><p>Levi comes around to the other side. "May I?"</p><p>"Yup. Bout time you make your way down here." He gets in and starts to look around.</p><p>"Sorry, I didn't care......What are all these buttons for?"</p><p>"That just warms my heart Levi. Radio, temperature, mostly just conveniences. The real meat of the car is under the hood. That button there is how I fire missiles..."</p><p>"Missiles?"</p><p>"Titan go boom. And these are for my spear hooks."</p><p>"It's kind of cold down here, is it always like this?"</p><p>"Yeah, it's because of the big doors we need to get my car out. Hold on." I get out and go to my trunk, digging around until I find a blanket. "Here" I say and hand the blanket to him. "Don't be a hog though, It's big enough to cover my side too. I'm going to have to go through my trunk more thoroughly, there's stuff back there I forgot I even had!"</p><p>He hands over a part of the blanket to me and we sit in silence for a few moments.</p><p>"I also found this" I pull out a black box with a thick strap attached to it.</p><p>"What is it?" He says looking closely.</p><p>"A polaroid camera."</p><p>"Well what does it do?"</p><p>"It catches an image called a photograph."</p><p>"How?"</p><p>"By directing light to a single point and focusing an image onto the film inside. Here, watch." I lean over towards him causing him to lean away confused. "Dude, hold still." I snap the picture and he blinks rapidly.</p><p>"That was bright!"</p><p>"Yeah, hold on." I start waving the photo around and then present it to him. "Your eyes are closed!"</p><p>"Well it was bri....what is this? How?" He takes the photo from me and studies it closely. What he sees is astounding. There he is, eyes closed. Next to him, cheek almost touching his...her. Smiling. "This moment has been captured forever?"</p><p>"Yeah, that's the point of it."</p><p>"What can you take pictures of?"</p><p>"Anything you want. Word of advice though...please don't ever take a picture of your manhood and try to give it to a girl. Guys think it's sexy, but it's just creepy."</p><p>"Why would I want to?!" He exclaims, horrified. I just laugh.</p><p>"Nevermind Levi."</p><p>"So is this what you do when you come down here late? Just sit in your car and listen to your music?"</p><p>"No, not just that but it is a big part. I like the solitude."</p><p>" You like the solitude, but you're so lonely you need a cat?"</p><p>"Yes, exactly."</p><p>"You are so confusing."</p><p>"Thanks!"</p><p>"What is this we are listening to now?"</p><p>"Stabbing Westward."</p><p>"That's a weird name for a song.."</p><p>"No, that's the band. The song is called Save Yourself."</p><p>"Oh. I actually think I kinda like it." He states, kind of amused 'i've been around her too long. Her noise is actually becoming a bit appealing. gods.' Gazing at the picture, Levi sits lost in thought. 'this has got to be the most amazing thing I've ever seen...what is her world like that they can create such powerful weapons of destruction, and yet such beautiful creations such as this? It's like we're frozen in time...and that smile....' Realizing his thoughts, he shuts down and sits looking out the window. 'i have to admit this car is more intriguing than i care to confess. What's it like when it's awake i wonder?' "Does everyone have these cars where you're from?"</p><p>"Pretty much, but not all are equipped to deal with titans."</p><p>"So where did you get yours?", he asks nervously having guessed the answer already based on the journal he should never have read.</p><p>"My father. He designed the equipment for it."</p><p>"Where is he now?"</p><p>"He passed away..cancer."</p><p>"I'm sorry."</p><p>I smile sadly. "Thank you. What about you? How did you end up in the survey corps?"</p><p>He takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly before responding. "You were right..."</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>"What you said to Sasha in the mess hall."</p><p>"Oh! You heard that. Levi, I'm sorry..."</p><p>"No. Don't. You were right....I was on my own except for Kenny."</p><p>"Kenny?"</p><p>"Just someone who didn't care to stick around....I was a criminal for a long time, even took a contract on Commander Erwin's life. My comrades and I were caught with stolen ODM gear. Erwin actually forced me into the corps as atonement."</p><p>"And he's still here sooo..."</p><p>"Things didn't go as planned and I don't regret any of it."</p><p>"And your comrades?"</p><p>"Killed by titans, and I wasn't around to save them."</p><p>"Oh Levi...I'm so sorry." I reach out an place my hand on his. A moment later I notice movement by the lab entrance.</p><p>"Hey, someone is there but I can't tell who."</p><p>"Tch. It's probably Miche. No big deal. He can probably smell us in here." He states comfortably, pulling the blanket up over him more.</p><p>"Sniffy boy is something else. You think if I threw a stick he would retrieve it?"</p><p>Levi bursts out laughing. "Sniffy boy? Heather, stop!"</p><p>"When Erwin says good boy, does he roll over for tummy rubs?"</p><p>"Heather!" Laughing even harder, Levi sits up and turns to face me.</p><p>"He better not pee on my tires or hump my leg...."</p><p>"Alright Heather, that's enough!" Still chuckling but getting himself under control little by little he adds, "You wait until you're in the field with us someday and you hear him call 'titans, a dozen 500 yards to the east'. You'll be grateful for that nose."</p><p>"Oh no doubt, and I meant no disrespect, just....he's a little bit intrusive sometimes you know?"</p><p>Thinking about his cloak, and Miche's comments he rolls his eyes. "Oh yes, believe me I know."</p><p> We sit quietly for a moment, and then he excuses himself; taking the picture with him.</p><p>Levi's journal: I kept wondering what she was doing in that dark, cold car closet so I went down there. No big deal, right? Turns out her machine does some really interesting stuff. I'll need to look up what missiles are and how they work. Maybe Hanji can replicate them into our 3dm gear. But the weirdest thing was this...Fotograf. Why can't I stop staring at it? Why do I even care? I do love that smile....</p><p>Heather's journal: My car is coming along nicely, and I got the opportunity to explain some of this to Levi. THAT was long overdue. I feel like he was that person that just had no imagination, and blew off the potential of what me and my car could offer as bullshit. Stubborn and close minded. I'm glad that I could at the very least lower that barrier, it was so irritating! But I admit, I enjoyed his company tonight.....maybe he's not as much of an asshole as I thought</p><p>Immediately upon entering Hanji's work space, he is bombarded with a barrage of questions.</p><p>"So Levi, how was your date with Heather the other night?"</p><p>"Date?"</p><p>"You know what I'm talking about. Everybody saw you two on the walls together and EVERYBODY could smell her perfume on your cloak!"</p><p>"Shitty Glasses, you are about to get your face punched in."</p><p>"What, if two people don't deserve each other more it's definitely you two."</p><p>"I hope you're joking Hanji. You had better be fucking joking."</p><p>"God, you two are so alike! I couldn't get any information out of her either! You definitely found your ultimate secret keeper, Levi!"</p><p>Levi storms out of Hanji's office and heads down the hall glaring at anyone dumb enough to try to interact with him. "I was so mad. So sure that she was spreading stories. She didn't say a word. Way to go Levi, you asshole."</p><p>Levi's journal: Ok so I show Heather the walls for one FUCKING SECOND and everyone thinks we're a thing? The perfume was one thing but this is just getting stupid. Hanji is the one spreading these shitty rumors so I have to think of a way to get back at her without breaking her bird nose. I was just showing her the walls. That's what I was supposed to do right?? Erwin said to treat her like a new recruit so why am I getting all this shit? It's not my fault she's the ONLY new recruit around here right now!</p>
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<a name="section0020"><h2>20. An Attempt at Intimacy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Levi's journal: Since when am I such a chickenshit? She looked so confused when I turned tail and ran!</p>
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    <p>The Next Night:</p><p>"Do you mind if I grab another book? I'm done with IT." Looking up from my paper, I shrug.</p><p>"Go for it." Pulling books off the shelf randomly and reading the back, he settles on Anne Rice's The Witching Hour. "Good choice", I say looking up briefly.</p><p>Coming to the couch, he lies down putting his head in my lap. I look down at him questioningly.</p><p>"What? I thought we were all about invading personal space lately, Heather." Rolling my eyes I go back to what I was doing.</p><p>"Be my guest." Reaching up, he grabs my paper.</p><p>"What are you doing?"</p><p>"Drawing...don't do that, you'll ruin it."</p><p>"I wanna see..."</p><p>Sighing I hold it out for him. "It's not done..."</p><p>"That's really good!"</p><p>"The nose needs work."</p><p>"No, Heather it's great I think it looks just like me. It's better than I would do...have you seen me try to draw?"</p><p>I laugh. "Do you want it when it's done?"</p><p>"Yeah, I do."</p><p>"Well then lie down and read. Let me concentrate."</p><p>'like YOU let ME concentrate?', he thinks to himself opening the book. 'you're always distracting me...' A half hour later, I tap him on the shoulder.</p><p>"It's done. And could you get up? I'm going to take a shower." He gets up grudgingly, and I grab my backpack and head for the bathroom. I come out fifteen minutes later, to find my music on and Levi still immersed in the book he's reading.</p><p>'He's turning into a book nerd like me', I think giggling. I grab some cleaning supplies and start on the windows.</p><p>"Now?" he says, "I thought you were going to do that this morning?"</p><p>"Well, I got sidetracked, so I want to get it done before I get distracted by something else." Shrugging, he continues to read.</p><p>"What are we listening to? It's awful slow." He says, putting the book down and sitting up.</p><p>"I don't remember ever putting it on my playlist, but it's called Sad Eyes."</p><p>"But why is it so slow?"</p><p>"It's a love song, Levi. People like to dance together to this stuff, and you've heard me play slow stuff before."</p><p>"Ugh, do you mean like dancing at the stupid balls the politicians throw?"</p><p>"No, not quite. It's a different kind of partner dancing."</p><p>"Then how are you supposed to dance to songs like this?" Rolling my eyes, I grab his hands and pull him up from the couch.</p><p>"Like this...". I put his arms around me, and he jumps.</p><p>'oh god what is she doing now...she-' and when I put my arms around his neck, stepping in close he looks about to panic. Trying not to giggle at his reaction I act like nothing is amiss and start leading him through the steps. 'she's too close, what do I do?' After a moment, Levi lets himself relax and actually enjoy the moment. 'this is actually kind of soothing...and I've only stepped on her foot twice so far, so chalk one up for Levi.' He pulls me in closer, and I move to him willingly.</p><p>Cheek to cheek we continue to dance. 'is she trembling?...no, that's me..or maybe both of us..do you think before you do shit like this, Heather? maybe i should stop asking loaded questions and i wouldn't get these complicated situations...'. When the song ends, we step back from each other, looking down awkwardly. Another song has started, just a slow as the last. (Magnet and Steel, Walter Egan)</p><p>"I should get back to cleaning windows.." I turn away to do that, but he grabs my hand.</p><p>"I'm leaving tomorrow, can we dance once more Heather?" Pulling me close, we wrap our arms around each other tightly. Cuddling up against him, I smile. He buries his face in my hair, and a moment later, I feel his lips on my neck. We both pull back in surprise.</p><p>'did he just...'</p><p>'i wasn't thinking!...' Despite his panicked thought he leans in and kisses me on the lips tentatively. We stay that was for a while, lips barely touching and eyes closed.</p><p>'oh hell...' I think and this time I kiss him. We kiss throughout the song, and though his kiss is tender, it has a sense of urgency to it that has me wanting more than just his lips. Hands wandering, we move towards the couch. The song stops. Loud metal music starts pouring out of my speakers. We both jump, and step back.</p><p>Looking terribly embarrassed he excuses himself. "I'm going to bed." He leaves me alone in the middle of the room. 'does she have feelings for me? should i ask her? do i want to know?....i don't know how to handle this...''</p><p>Levi's journal: Since when am I such a chickenshit? She looked so confused when I turned tail and ran! Fuck what is my problem...I suck! Face down a titan? Cool, I can do that. Be intimate with her? Nope. Does the fact that she kissed me back mean anything more than it did last time??? fuck, I don't know. i can't WAIT to leave for a couple weeks. Give myself some time to think things through.</p><p>Heather's journal: I don't know how to feel right now. I don't know what to think. I mean, everything is so mixed up in my head. I WANTED him to kiss me! I WANTED his hands on me! Things are changing between us so fast, I feel like a bullet being shot from a gun. I don't know if I'm even remotely ready for this...whatever it's turning into.......</p>
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<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Time Apart</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Alright then...good luck." I glance at him awkwardly, kinda hoping he would kiss me. Something.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Levi is packing for the expedition. "Do you want to take my camera?"</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>"You can take big game trophy hunter photos of the titans you kill before they disappear. Trust me, it's a thing."</p><p>"Levi smirks and lightly chuckles. "I'll pass. How about you take some good photos while I'm gone?"</p><p>"Okay. You're not leaving all ready are you?"</p><p>"Didn't you see the time? We're leaving soon."</p><p>"Alright then...good luck." I glance at him awkwardly, kinda hoping he would kiss me. Something.</p><p>He stands there for a moment feeling awkward as well, then leaves. 'well Levi, you could have at least said something especially after last night...', he thinks to himself walking down the hall. They reach their first campsite with no incident, and Levi is unpacking in his tent. He pauses, realizing that I stuffed my headset into his backpack without him realizing. There is a piece of paper wrapped around a cassette, which he unfolds and reads:</p><p>Side One: Relax Dumbass!</p><p>Chicago, Wishin' you were here</p><p>Billy Squier, My kinda Lover *</p><p>Elvin Bishop, Fooled around and fell In Love</p><p>ELO, Can't get it out of my Head *</p><p>Journey, Feelin that Way *</p><p>Anytime</p><p>Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, Crimson and Clover *</p><p>Muse, Madness *</p><p>CCR, I put a Spell on You *</p><p>Robert John, Sad Eyes</p><p>Bob Marley, Stir it Up</p><p>Thc, Overfire</p><p>Dip</p><p>The Jesus and Mary Chain, Cherry Came Too</p><p>Smashing Pumpkins, Luna</p><p>Mayonaise</p><p>Portishead, Undenied</p><p>Clan of Xymox, Smile Like Heaven</p><p>George Harrison, I'd Have You Anytime</p><p>Depeche Mode, I am You</p><p>Side Two: Let's kill some Bitches!</p><p>Ted Nugent, Stranglehold *</p><p>Deep Purple, Highway Star *</p><p>Space Truckin'</p><p>Frijid Pink, End of the Line</p><p>ELP, Knife's Edge *</p><p>The Stooges, Loose *</p><p>Death, Freakin' Out *</p><p>AC/DC, Back in Black</p><p>Motorhead, Ace of Spades</p><p>Volbeat, Die to Live *</p><p>Five Finger Death Punch, Under and Over It *</p><p>Slipknot, The devil in I</p><p>All out Life *</p><p>Killpop*</p><p>Twiztid, Kill Somebody *</p><p>Ghost, Cirice *</p><p>Cage the Elephant, Cold Cold Cold*</p><p>Dead Sara, Lemon Scent</p><p>Bad Brains, I against I *</p><p>Greta Van Fleet, Highway Tune</p><p>Agnostic Front, Victim in Pain *</p><p>Naked Raygun, Soldier's Requiem *</p><p>The White Stripes, Blue Orchid*</p><p>Avatar, Hail the Apocalypse</p><p>Tsar Bomba *</p><p>Janes Addiction, Mountain Song</p><p>3 Days *</p><p>Stabbing Westward, Save Yourself</p><p>PS: Enjoy!! :) PPS: *=Favorites!</p><p>He smiles, places the cassette into the player, grabs one more thing from his pack; the photo, and lies down for some much needed rest.</p><p>Levi's journal: I don't know when or how, but she managed to sneak Her headset in my pack. I know it plays music, and she wrote all the songs down, but how the hell am I supposed to work it?</p><p>Ok I got the thing in but how do I start it? Damn it Heather why did you not include instructions?</p><p>Ok these songs are pretty good. And the songs we danced to are on here as well. It's so much nicer listening to this than everyone else snoring like freakish animals. Maybe I'll actually get some sleep tonight.</p><p>It's around 3 and I can't stop staring at this picture. It's better than anything I've seen drawn. Maybe I should have taken up Heather's offer, but I know if it was with me I'd break it on the mission. Plus the extra weight would be nauseating. Why does she look so happy here though? After all the shit she's been through and all the shit I've been giving her....why is she smiling?</p><p>Heather's journal: It's been awhile since I've written. Levi left three days ago and I'm so stinking BORED. I think I've read almost all my books, and I've cleaned so much I have a permanent odor of cleaning supplies fuuuuuck. That stupid tick in my engine is still there, but I'm pretty sure it won't be long and she'll be good to go again.</p><p>Something occurred to me. When I was sick, Levi expressed unwanted curiosity in my journal... dear lord did he read it?? I hope not! I should probably keep this near me from now on just in case. Especially considering what I'm about to tell you, my dear secret keeper. Do I actually miss the guy? I have to wonder, considering the ridiculously SEXY dream I had about him last night!! Why?? Not cool! I'm not going into details, and it wasn't like it was something so dang dirty I should be embarrassed about it or anything...but shit. It's enough that it happened at all! Why?!! I'm sure it had plenty to do with that kissing session we had the other night but....</p><p>I hope he liked the tape...not really sure why I made it for him, just got it in my head that it would be a good idea I guess.</p><p>A Week Later:</p><p>Back from the expedition...it's 1 am and Levi is exhausted. He enters his quarters, locks the door immediately behind him and heads straight for the couch. He stops, confused and a little disappointed. 'Where is she?' He wonders, a slight frown playing on his lips. "Tch, she's probably downstairs. Why are you so disappointed? She didn't seem sorry when you left anyway." Then he shakes his head and thinks, 'Idiot, what kind of goodbye were you expecting. You didn't make much of an issue about it yourself.' He places his photo on his desk and then pulls his gear out of his pack, giving it a good cleaning and inspecting it thoroughly.</p><p>After an hour he puts his gear away, looks at the clock and thinks, "Maybe I can get a couple hours of sleep." He goes in to his room and is just about to lie down when he notices a tuft of blonde hair peeking out from under his blanket. "Why is she in my bed?", he wonders. Rolling his eyes, he taps me on the shoulder.</p><p>I open one eye sleepily, stretch, give a tiny squeak of a yawn and reach out to put a hand on his arm. "You're back...I missed you." I yawn again and roll over, my eyes drifting shut.</p><p>"WHAT?", he thinks to himself. Outloud he says, " What did you say?"</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>"Did you just say you missed me?"</p><p>"Hey, it was pretty boring here without you to annoy."</p><p>"But why are you in my bed?"</p><p>"Oh come on Levi, do you think I enjoy sleeping on that lumpy ass couch? If you're not here i'm gonna steal your bed."</p><p>"Well you can go back to the couch now."</p><p>"Heck no. I'm comfortable." I roll over and put the blankets over my head. He sighs, rolls his eyes and goes to lie down on the couch. He's tossing and turning and thinking about the last three weeks on the mission and what he came home to.</p><p>"Did you really miss me, or was that just half sleep talk?" Getting up to grab the picture off his desk, he notices a pile of similar photos sitting off to the side. Going through them he grins. Here's a picture of kitty mid-yawn, what appears to be Hanji's eyeball, and several of Heather. Blowing a kiss from over her shoulder, holding kitty, laughing, and for some reason, now his absolute favorite of all: staring out the window with a mug of tea. The sunlight is streaming through the window causing her hair to glow. She let Hanji get a hold of her camera? It's a wonder it's still in one piece.</p><p>Levi's journal: Damn woman 'missed' me. What the hell is that supposed to mean?? ?</p><p>?! ?! ?</p><p> I missed her too.</p><p>Heather's journal: Levi is finally home. Got in at a ridiculous hour, and woke me up but he's in one piece, so I guess that's all that matters. I feel kinda awkward this morning though. Every time he says something to me, my brain flashes back to the 'dream'. I hope he hasn't noticed how damn red-faced I am. He seems a little awkward too for some reason. Hmmmm...</p>
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<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Test Drive</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>I mash the pedal down, burning the tires for a moment before we take off. Levi is thrown back wide-eyed. He slowly starts to grin. "Like that?" I ask and he nods. "That button on the door controls the window. You can roll it back up if you prefer."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>One Week Later:</p><p>He's dreaming. He is in a field and he is walking behind me. I am wearing a blue dress that flutters in the wind. He reaches out to grab me, but I turn to water and trickle through his fingers. I materialize in front of him and again he tries to grab me, but I turn into a swarm of butterflies and disperse around his head. Swatting his hands annoyingly he says "you just have to make everything difficult" and the ground falls away underneath him. He feels like he's falling.....</p><p>Wait. What? He opens his eyes to find me sitting on top of him, straddling his chest. 'what the fuck?' he wonders. I have a huge giddy smile on my face and seeing he's awake, I drum an excited beat on his chest.</p><p>"It's running, Levi!"</p><p>"What. What's running?" I roll my eyes and blow a stray lock of hair from my forehead.</p><p>"My car, you ninny!"</p><p>"Yeah?" I just nod excitedly, unable to speak.</p><p>Enjoying the wake up, yet feeling simultaneously annoyed by it, Levi sighs and rubs the sleep from his eyes. "While I share your enthusiasm, I don't feel I can properly express the raging joy inside me while pinned to my bed."</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>"Get the fuck off of me Heather."</p><p>"Oh! Right!" I jump up off of him, give an excited bounce and skip out closing the door behind me. He throws his legs over the side of his bed and sits for a minute collecting himself. He gets up, starts to get dressed, but stops momentarily getting caught off guard by a flash of the dream he was having prior to being woke. He brushes the thought off, and begins dressing again. After a few moments he exits the bedroom to find me pacing around anxiously.</p><p>"Ready?"</p><p>"Yeah. You didn't have to wait for me you know."</p><p>"I know. Come on."</p><p>"Jesus, let me grab some tea."</p><p>"Ugh. That will take forever. There's tea downstairs, come on!"</p><p>"Yeah" he mumbles, heading for the door "But not good tea."</p><p>"Where's the car?"</p><p>"Already outside. Hanji and I had to test run it."</p><p>"You went without me?"</p><p>"Just around the wall. You and I are going much farther. Come on!" I skip over to my car, with a ridiculously huge grin on my face.</p><p>"Get in!"</p><p>"Have fun Levi" Hanji says and steps back. Levi hesitates, feeling slightly unsure. 'It's one thing to sit in her car when we are in the bay, but moving?' He thinks to himself. I roll down his window.</p><p>"Hey! Get in already! My car doesn't bite, but I might if you don't hurry up!" He rolls his eyes and gets in.</p><p>"Put your belt on. Like this." I demonstrate and he follows suit. "Okay, before we go let me give you a run down. My missiles are heat seeking. Once I lock on a target, it doesn't matter where it goes the missile will follow. so even if you have troops around they won't be endangered by it. The target will be vaporized. There's no regenerating from that!" I laugh. "Okay. Next. My hooks will pierce a titan and I can drag it down and even maneuver it into a more viable position. Your seat is designed so that I can eject you out of the car and you can then enact odm and finish it off."</p><p>"But what if a titan catches up to you?" </p><p>"Do they catch up to your horses?"</p><p>"Well no...I mean not often..."</p><p>"A titan definitely will not chase my car down."</p><p>"I'll have you know Nugget is a pretty fast horse."</p><p>"Oh I'm sure she? he?"</p><p>"she"</p><p>"Is. But...hmm. How long would it take Nugget to get to those mountains in the distance?" He looks off into the distance,</p><p>"We could be there by late tomorrow morning." </p><p>"Oh? Well imagine 426 Nuggets combined."</p><p>"I call bullshit."</p><p>"I call hold the fuck on Levi, you're about to shit your pants." I turn the key, and the engine roars into life.</p><p>"Jesus! What is that sound?"</p><p>"426 horses, that's what. You ready?" He nods, a little wide-eyed and says "Let's go"</p><p>I mash the pedal down, burning the tires for a moment before we take off. Levi is thrown back wide-eyed. He slowly starts to grin. "Like that?" I ask and he nods. "That button on the door controls the window. You can roll it back up if you prefer."</p><p>He shakes his head, enjoying the wind whipping in at him. He sticks him arm out the window, and is surprised at the force of the wind pushing his arm back. "How fast are we going?"</p><p>"Not even top speed. We're going 80 right now."</p><p>"80?"</p><p>"if we maintain this speed, we can go 80 miles in one hour."</p><p>"Damn, that seems impossible! Can we go top speed?"</p><p>"Maybe when I'm more familiar with the terrain, and only short distances. Last thing I need is to blow my engine."</p><p>"Bad?"</p><p>"There's no way I could fix it here."</p><p>"Shit...hey. What are those red dots?"</p><p>"Titans. Shall we?" He nods in agreement. "Then let's go." I veer hard right, leaving a trail of dust in my wake. Levi grabs the dash, leaning far to the left from the force of my turn. My car fishtails and then rights itself, continuing forward.</p><p>"Alright, it's a 20 meter. There appears to be a swarm of 10 meters behind it about a mile."</p><p>"You can tell that? How?"</p><p>"Bottom of the screen."</p><p>"But where does the information come from?"</p><p>"From my car's computing system. Basically this is how we communicate."</p><p>"How can you talk to a car?"</p><p>"Alexa, tell Levi he's a dumbass."</p><p>Alexa: "Levi, you are a dumbass." I bust out laughing at the shock on his face, give him and exaggerated air kiss, wink then continue driving.</p><p>"How does this work, but the radio to signal home doesn't?"</p><p>"I don't know, Levi. My cell phone doesn't work either but yet I can use my headset, and other electronics. It really doesn't make any sense." The titans are looming closer, and we can now see them in the distance. Still tiny, but growing as we eatup the distance between us.</p><p>"Alright, we're close enough. Use that stick to your left with...no, not that one...yes, that one....Use that stick to move the X on the screen until it is centered on the titan. When you've got it, press the green button" !BOOM! We drive through a wall of ash where the titan used to be.</p><p>"Titan go boom."</p><p>He shudders. "That was impressive, I'll admit. I mean I saw it when you first arrived, but that was amazing."</p><p>"Thanks. Alright, that button will retract the roof. Go ahead and push it. When this group is downed I'll send you out. Ready?"</p><p>"Yes." I fire out my spears, catching the titans by the hamstrings in two tight groups. Putting on a burst of speed, the lines pull taut yanking the titans off their feet. I hit the brakes and turn my car to swing the captured titans away from my car and flipping them neatly onto their stomachs, napes exposed.</p><p>"Go!" I push the button ejecting Levi into the air above the us and he enacts his gear. It's my turn to be astonished. One pass. One pass and he got every single one of their napes! 'it has to be that spinning technique', I think to myself, but on the heels of that 'why the hell do I find this so hot?' I giggle at my own ridiculousness and Levi comes back to the car, giving me a questioning look. For a few moments he's silently sitting in his seat, body angled towards me and staring very intently into my eyes.</p><p>"You win, Heather. I'm convinced." He turns away and replaces his seatbelt. Noticing I haven't started my car back up, he turns to me. "Heather?...Heather what is it?"</p><p>"One fucking pass. You took all eight of them out in one pass. That..was...fucking...HOT."</p><p>"C-can we go please?" He blushes, and turns back around in his seat. I start my car, and we continue towards the mountains.</p>
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<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Psych 101 and the Joys of Spelunking</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"It's fresh!" I call out, refilling my canteen. He comes over and does the same. "We should probably head back before..oh!" The ground gives way under my feet, and I disappear from view. The next thing Levi hears is a loud crack, and a shriek.</p>
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    <p>"Hey, can I ask you something?" The caution in his voice catches my attention, as this is not like him. I give him a questioning look, and continue driving.</p><p>"Sure, go for it."</p><p>"Does psychology say anything about dreams?"</p><p>"Yes, why?"</p><p>"Well, suppose you tried to touch somebody, but they turned to water and slipped through your fingers? What does that mean?...Anything?"</p><p>"Well, water usually signifies healing, love, emotions...so who were you trying to touch, and how do you feel about that person?" Embarrassed, and not wanting to admit to having dreamed of me specifically; he stutters out a quick lie.</p><p>"It was Nile! He told me over lunch, I was just curious is all...." I give him a slightly suspicious look, and turn my focus back to driving.</p><p>"Anything else?"</p><p>"Well he tried again, but then the person turned into a bunch of butterflies and were all around his head."</p><p>"Well, that could mean something in his life that's important and he's afraid of losing, or someone he cares a lot about and is afraid of scaring away..."</p><p>"He tried to swat them away...and asked why the person had to always make things so difficult"</p><p>"Having a hard time processing the emotions this other person has him feeling..."</p><p>"The ground caved in underneath him and he fell."</p><p>"Overwhelmed by the situation, or nothing at all....maybe one of the kids jumped on the bed at that moment and gave the impression to his sleeping mind that he was falling."</p><p>Levi blushes, thinking about waking up to find me straddling him that morning. "I see how it all fits together, thanks."</p><p>"Yeah, sure. Weird dream to have about someone you're already committed to though...OH GOD! Is he cheating on Marie?"</p><p>"No!" 'shit, Levi you might of created a big mess for the poor man...I hope she doesn't say anything to either of them!' "Nothing like that at all. And I was just curious, no big deal alright?"</p><p>"Well alright, but I feel if anyone needs some dream analysis it's you. I know you have some pretty bad dreams Levi."</p><p>"I'm good."</p><p>I laugh. "Like hell, man. I'll help out any way I can Levi, just say the word. " </p><p>We continue on in silence for the rest of our drive. Levi looks out the window and thinks about the dream he had. 'That was scary accurate...oh jeez, how would i ever tell her any of this?....I can think of a few ways I'd like you to 'help me out' Heather, although I'm not sure if you'd be inclined....' Grinning to himself, he looks out the window. Soon I screech to a halt at the base of the mountain.</p><p>"Holy Shit! That was fast!" It had only taken a couple hours to get there, and the drive was peaceful for the most part.</p><p>"Would have been even quicker if not for the titans."</p><p>"Amazing! It's occurring to me how something like this could improve the range of our expeditions....I've been a bit of an idiot, haven't I?"</p><p>"Yep! Definitely idiotic."</p><p>"Ha..Ha. Hey look, there's a cave just up there. Up for a climb?"</p><p>"Shouldn't we be getting back?"</p><p>"NOW who's the boring one?"</p><p>"Still you, Levi. Let's go." The climb was nice. Not too strenuous, but at a steady incline. As we neared the top, the ground got a little bit gravelly and uneven.</p><p>"Oh!" I exclaim as I begin sliding steadily back down. I feel strong arms wrap around me, and help me to stand up again.</p><p>"Are you alright??" Worry apparent in his voice, he eyes me anxiously.</p><p>"Yes. I'm fine." I wrap my arms around his, lean my head on his chest for a moment and look up at him. "Thank you.", I say while disengaging from his grasp and continuing to climb.</p><p>He stands immobile for a moment, trying to process what just happened. He shakes his head, and continues upward following behind me. After about another ten minutes of climbing, I had reached the top.</p><p>"Hey Levi, hurry up! The view is amazing!"</p><p>He looks up and stops climbing. 'Fuck.....it certainly is.' I had reached a plateau, head thrown back and drinking from my canteen. The sun created a nimbus of light, almost halo-like around my head. "Damn it woman you are so beautiful." he says out loud, not thinking.</p><p>"Did you say something Levi?", I call down.</p><p>"Nothing. I was just thinking how defensible this position would be." Embarrassed, he continues to climb.</p><p>"Is that all you ever think about, Levi? Work?" I call down.</p><p>'Sometimes I WISH it was that simple again...' He thinks to himself, catching up to me.</p><p>We explored the cave in awkward silence; me on one side and him on the other. We keep snatching glances at each other, unfortunately always at the exact same time; with neither of us really getting away with the looks as a result. 'I wish I could stop thinking about his arms around me. God, how distracting...'</p><p>'Shit. We're alone. Actually physically alone. No one around to knock on the door at the wrong time, no noisy brats...just the two of us. I don't know if i can do this.', He thinks to himself, stealing another quick glance. Noticing an opening at the far back of the cave, he goes to investigate. "Hey Heather, it looks like the cave drops to a lower level." I come up beside him to see for myself.</p><p>"We'd need sufficient light...actual spelunking gear..."</p><p>"Spelunking?"</p><p>"Yeah. Also, this cave is damp, so the farther down we go it's going to get cold."</p><p>"So are you saying it would be a bad idea to go down there?"</p><p>"I mean, we might be okay, but we stand more of a risk getting into a bad situation without the gear I've mentioned."</p><p>"We have rope, and the lantern...."</p><p>I sigh, and turn to look at him. "Rope isn't the proper gear.", I give him a questioning look, "Are you sure you want to do this, Levi?"</p><p>He nods. "I should be able to tie the rope here. This place would be very defensible from titans, I would like to see more."</p><p>"Well light the lantern first. I need to see how far it goes down before we go any further." He walks over with the lantern, and shines it down into a small cavern below.</p><p>"Yeah, we have enough rope. I'm still not sure about this though. How much gas do you have left in your canister?"</p><p>"Enough to get us back up there if necessary."</p><p>I blow out a huge breath, then clap my hands. "Alright let's do this."</p><p>He secures the rope, then stands back. "Ladies first." I give a slight nod, then begin my descent.</p><p>After 5 minutes, I call up "Your turn!" </p><p>Levi descends more slowly, as he is also holding on to the lantern. Once he reaches the bottom, we begin exploring again. I find a small pool of water, and test it. </p><p>"It's fresh!" I call out, refilling my canteen. He comes over and does the same. "We should probably head back before..oh!" The ground gives way under my feet, and I disappear from view. The next thing Levi hears is a loud crack, and a shriek.</p>
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<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Levi Takes the Wheel</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Agreed...hey, how are we going to get back? Can you drive like this?"</p><p>I start to giggle. "Looks like you're getting a driving lesson."</p><p>He pulls back, eyes wide. "Oh no no no. Maybe we should spend the night here after all."</p>
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    <p>"Heather!!!" Not thinking, Levi jumps down and lands awkwardly a few feet away. He scrambles hurriedly over, feeling around frantically trying to find me. After a moment his hands brush against my hair, and then my face. I reach up to lace my fingers through his.</p><p>"Levi, calm down."</p><p>"Calm down?! You're hurt! I heard the crack! What was that? Your ankle? And it's my fault! That was reckless and stupid! What was I thinking?!!"</p><p>I could hear him getting angrier and angrier as he ranted. Reaching up, I find his face and cup it in my hands. "Levi, it's okay. I agreed to come down here, and it's not your fault the ground caved in."</p><p>He jerks his head away, ignoring my attempts to reassure him, and muttering to himself. I sigh, and reach up lacing my fingers behind his neck. Using him as leverage I pull myself into a sitting position. This inadvertently puts me into his lap, but instead of moving away, I snuggle myself into his warmth and place my head on his chest.</p><p>"It's okay" I whisper, and fall silent. His arms wrap around me tightly, and I feel his chin resting on top of my head.</p><p>"I'm so sorry Heather, can you move?"</p><p>"Help me stand." He manages to get me into a standing position, all my weight on one foot. "I guess you're going to have to carry me. There's just enough light to see where I fell from. Let's hope you have enough gas for this."</p><p>Without a word, he picks me up and begins to ascend. Reaching the level above, he gently puts me down as far from the cave-in as possible, and reaches for the backpack we brought. "That's broke.", he states nodding at my ankle.</p><p>"Well let's get it set so we can get back to my car. I don't want to be here after dark."</p><p>"Agreed...hey, how are we going to get back? Can you drive like this?"</p><p>I start to giggle. "Looks like you're getting a driving lesson."</p><p>He pulls back, eyes wide. "Oh no no no. Maybe we should spend the night here after all." He begins digging in the pack, looking for anything to set my ankle, and also...'why did Hanji only pack one bedroll?' Blushing, he repacks the things he doesn't need at the moment, and brings the medical supplies over to where I lie.</p><p>"Everyone will be worried sick. You'll do fine."</p><p>"Heather...."</p><p>"Look, as long as we get back before dark everything will be okay. My car has lights for night driving. CORRECTION, ONE headlight, seeing someone BROKE the other one but for your first time I'm sure you'd rather have the daylight. Just drive slow and you'll catch on quick."</p><p>"Are you sure?"</p><p>I smile, and reach up to stroke his face. "I trust you."</p><p>'She..what?', he thinks to himself, feeling a none too unpleasant shiver course down his spine. Out of everything that happened today, these three words are what affect him the most. 'I never would have imagined hearing that from her'. "Alright, let me set this ankle." He gets to work, wincing to hear a small whimper of pain escape my lips. Hearing it makes him feel sick to his stomach. 'oh Heather, I am so sorry about this...' "Alright. It's done. I can have you climb onto my back and carry you up using the rope, or we can risk the last of my gas. What do you think?"</p><p>"Let's use the rope. We might need the gas for something else later."</p><p>"Alright, hold the lantern and climb on...you got it..careful..."</p><p>"Levi, I've got this..OW..There I'm ready. Let's go." The climb up to the main chamber is slow, but steady and we finally reach the top. 'How is he so strong?' I think to myself, feeling my face grow alarmingly red at the feel of all that muscle working beneath me.</p><p>It takes us some time to get to my car but we get there with no incident. I maneuver myself into the passenger seat, then look around for something to keep my ankle still for the drive.</p><p>"Levi, my blanket is in the back, let's use this to cushion my ankle for the drive." He reaches into the back, grabbing the blanket then bends down to adjust the blanket around my leg.</p><p>"Good?" he asks, giving me a questioning look.</p><p>"Good. Let's get going."</p><p>He takes a deep breath, and let's it out slowly. "Alright, so what do I do?" I reach over and show him where the key goes, and he manages to get the car going without any help.</p><p>"Alright. There are two pedals by your feet. The one on the right, is the gas and the other is the brakes. Step on the brake and hold it down.</p><p>"Now what?"</p><p>"This stick by my hand, press the button and pull the stick down to the letter D. That's drive...okay, good. Now take your foot off the brake." We start creeping forward, and he immediately steps on the brake throwing us both forward. "Levi, take your foot off the brake, and GENTLY press the gas." LURCH! (moving again) LURCH! I'm laughing hysterically. "Stop touching the brakes," I giggle, "just gas." After a moment of trial and error the car begins to run smoothly. "There you go, you've got it! Give it a little more gas when you're comfortable...." I fly back in my seat. "Not that much! Don't brake! Don't brake!, just let off the gas a bit!" We get going smoothly again, and slowly make it up to about 45 mph. "You're doing great, Levi..see?"</p><p>"Thanks, this is pretty fun I'll admit. But, I'd like to learn how to do all the fancy shit you do someday."</p><p>"Maybe I'll give you a more in depth lesson....IF you teach me how to use ODM gear."</p><p>He glances over, grinning. "Done." We drive in silence for most of the ride, and after an hour and a half he finally speaks up. "Hey look, there's the old scouting quarters. This is where we'll be keeping her from now on. You should be able to work more freely here."</p><p>"You're moving me? Hanji didn't say anything..."</p><p>"We discussed it right before leaving. But no! You're staying with me still." I give him a questioning, slightly hurt look. "I'm sorry I didn't say anything sooner. I didn't think you would be concerned where you did your work as long as you were given your freedom to continue. Trust me this is the best place."</p><p>"Well alright then. Hey, slow down!" He screeches to a halt before crashing right into an excited Hanji. She moves off to the side, and guides the car in with her hands, indicating for Levi to stop when he was in line with the equipment she had set up. He gets out, and makes his way to the other side of the car.</p><p>"Hey, what took you guys so...oh! What happened?', she exclaims noting Levi picking me up and carrying me towards the entrance.</p><p>"Her ankle is broken." Already feeling irritated with Hanji's inevitable questions, he heads up a winding stairway and enters a room with a giant four post bed. He lies me down gently. "Can I get you anything?"</p><p>Ugh. I'm starving."</p><p>"I'll be back." He finds Hanji in the kitchen.</p><p>"Hanji, I need to talk to you."</p><p>"Yes, Levi?"</p><p>"While I appreciate you packing the backpack for us, I'm curious how you thought one bedroll would be enough for two?" He doesn't look up as he speaks to her, intent on picking out the best fruits to take upstairs and placing them on a tray.</p><p>"Gee, Levi...did I? I could of sworn I packed for two..."</p><p>"Hanji, cut the bullshit. I know you.." He whirls to face her, annoyed.</p><p>"No, YOU cut the bullshit. How stupid do you think we all are? We've all seen this, from day one. Maybe I packed one, just to get you to maybe DO something!"</p><p>"What do you expect me to do exactly?"</p><p>"TELL HER!" </p><p>He lets out a sigh and speaks with deliberate calm."Hanji, you have way more important things to focus on than what I may or may not feel for Heather. And as far as your assumptions regarding how she might feel...don't even try to influence her the way you just did me." He turns, grabs the tray of food and walks back up the stairs.</p><p>Watching him go, Hanji mutters "Oh Levi, you are a fool...".</p><p>A soft knock on the door. "Heather? May I come in?"</p><p>"Levi, what took so long?" He walks in carrying the tray and closes the door with his foot. Handing me the tray, he sits on the edge of the bed. I devour an apple in less than a minute, and then tear immediately into the bread.</p><p>"I stopped to talk to Hanji. If you don't need anything else, I'll leave you be." He starts to get up.</p><p>"Levi?"</p><p>"Yes?"</p><p>"It feels weird being in this big room alone."</p><p>"D-do you want m-me to stay?" Blushing at his stutter, and glad his back is to me at the moment, he thinks 'oh dear God, please say yes'. I turn to put the tray on the night table next to me and lie down.</p><p>"If it's not too much trouble..." Heart hammering crazily in his chest, he lies down being careful to leave an appropriate amount of space between us. I yawn, and he watches my eyes slowly drifting closed.</p><p>Immediately he flops onto his back and stares up at the ceiling. 'fuck. what do i do? Look how peaceful she looks. What would she do if I lied closer? Would she object? Do I put my arm around her? Would she let me? Is this what I'm supposed to do? I don't know what the fuck to do in this situation! Maybe I should have paid better attention when Reiner gives girl advice to the other cadets. Ugh, no he's a dumbass. Gods, I couldn't ask Erwin, I have the feeling he's just as clueless as I am. Miche? Yes, but he's not here. Hanji is the only other person here besides us, and I'll be damned if I'm asking her...how can I randomly kiss this woman and come off so damn confident...TWICE, but for this I'm a complete mess?' I sigh in my sleep, and he glances over watching as I stretch and roll over; my head now resting on his chest.  He gives a secret smile, wraps his arms around me, and drifts off to sleep.</p><p>A few hours later, he awakens to an impossible tangle of limbs. 'the hell..?' My injured leg is thrown over his waist, left arm extended behind me, right arm flopped over his chest and my head tilted back at an impossible angle. 'tch, this woman makes Bertholdt look normal', he thinks with a small chuckle. Slowly, as to not wake me he begins untangling himself. A knock sounds on the door and Hanji walks in.</p><p>He rolls his eyes at her. "Woman, why do you bother knocking if you're not going to have the decency to wait for a response?" She just grins and raises an eyebrow at the sight before her.</p><p>"I was going to say, I'm sure Heather is in no condition to travel on horseback, but one of us needs to give a report on your 'adventure' today. Based on what I see, I'm sure you'd rather be here, so what would you like me to tell Erwin?"</p><p>"Everything I already told you, minus the sight you are gawking at now."</p><p>Smiling, she backs towards the door. "I'll be back in a few hours." The door closes, and he sighs.</p><p>"Levi?" He looks over to see me smiling at him sleepily.</p><p>"How do you feel?"</p><p>"My ankle is throbbing, but it's not too bad.", I say while snuggling into him closer. I give a contented sigh, and my eyes drift closed again. A wave of despair washes over him as he watches me. 'she's going to leave me. I'll be alone again, just like always. why am I getting attached?' He sighs, gets up and goes downstairs to be alone with his thoughts.</p><p>Levi's Journal: I'll never forgive myself for THIS shit. She broke her ankle because of me. I don't care how many times she says it isn't my fault. It is. My idea to go down in that cave, my fault she's hurt. And not even the opportunity to snuggle (which I managed to take advantage of without having too big of a stroke) as great as that was can't stop me from rolling in guilt like shit and feeling like she's going to leave me someday and there isn't shit I can do about it. How can I blame her if she did leave? I'm shit!</p><p>Heather's journal: I would have called it a perfect day, if you forget about the broken ankle. Yep. Just beautiful. We took my car out. It's finally running! Levi was clearly enjoying it, he reminded me of a puppy on his first car ride! Head out the window, grinning ear to ear, but minus the panting with his tongue hanging out. I might of had to kick him out of my car. Well we found a cave and went exploring. He's right, this spot would have good tactical advantages, but going to the lower levels really was a bad idea. I feel so awful, he's clearly blaming himself, but I made the choice to go down there with him. that's on me, no matter how badly he wants to paint himself as the bad guy! </p><p>We snuggled. SNUGGLED! (like how i just toss that out there? No build up or anything, oh journal of mine?) It was sweet, and it made me happy. Who would of thought Levi would actually make me happy? I think I'm falling for him.....</p>
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<a name="section0025"><h2>25. Right Where I Want to Be</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>how can someone look so damn adorable in just a shirt?' He feels almost giddy at the sight; that is, until I start hobbling towards the closet. Sick waves of guilt hit him, and he feels miserable all over again. 'your fault...'</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>One Week Later:</p><p>"Heather, I had a shirt lying out what happened to it?"</p><p>"I'm wearing it."</p><p>"What the hell!"</p><p>"Well Levi, you won't let me go more than five feet on my ankle, so I can't go wash my stuff...what else am I supposed to wear?" The bathroom door creaks open and Levi pokes his head out, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>"Nothing...?"</p><p>"Levi, you're impossible!"</p><p>"Yeah. Can you get me another shirt, please?"</p><p>"The closet is like six feet away, that's a whole foot farther than I'm allowed."</p><p>"Since when do you do what you're told?"</p><p>"Since now."</p><p>"You just want to see me in a towel..."</p><p>"YOU just want to see me in nothing but your shirt..."</p><p>"Fair enough. Will you grab the shirt, please?"</p><p>"Well hold on, this cast is a pain in the butt."</p><p>"YOU'RE a pain in the butt, Heather."</p><p>"Best pain in the butt you've ever had..."</p><p>He grins, thinking about the last couple of months. 'You have no idea how true that...oh wow....how can someone look so damn adorable in just a shirt?' He feels almost giddy at the sight; that is, until I start hobbling towards the closet. Sick waves of guilt hit him, and he feels miserable all over again. 'your fault...'</p><p>A moment later, I pop back into view, heading for the bathroom. I hand him the shirt, and we stand there for a moment just looking at each other awkwardly. Blushing, he shuts the door.</p><p>"Be out in a bit."</p><p>Giggling, I head back to bed. Ten minutes later, Levi comes out of the bathroom.</p><p>"I don't understand why you couldn't have just got your pants on, then came and got a shirt yourself."</p><p>He pauses before answering, realizing that is exactly what he should have done in the first place. "My tunnel vision demanded a shirt."</p><p>I bust out laughing, and confused; Levi lies down on the bed, rolling over to face me.</p><p>"What's so funny?"</p><p>"You, Levi." Rolling his eyes, but secretly pleased he could make me laugh he reaches out putting a hand over mine.</p><p>"Are you going to be fine for a couple hours?"</p><p>"I'll be alright. You have things to do. Go." I wake up a few hours later to see Levi tossing a few bags on the bed next to me.</p><p>"What's all this?"</p><p>He shrugs. "You need more clothes..."</p><p>Giggling, I grab the first bag. "Presents....!"</p><p>"I realize nothing I bought you will have half your chest pouring out of it like normal, but I hope it will suffice." Flinging my arms around him in a big hug, I give him a kiss on the cheek.</p><p>"No, this is great thank you!"</p><p>Squirming away awkwardly he mumbles, "No big deal....get some rest." He sits at his desk, wanting to get some of this paperwork done in a reasonable amount of time, but all he can really think about is how happy I was, and the small nagging thought that if I had the chance, no matter what he did now, I would leave him.....</p><p>Levi's Journal: Is she really that interested in seeing me in a towel?? Based on her blush, I'd say yes and i can't deny how ridiculously happy that makes me feel. Happy? Me? Impossible, you would think but it's true. For the first time in years I am genuinely happy. Someday, I am going to work up the courage to tell her this, even if she straight up laughs. Oh god, what if she laughs?! The way she threw her arms around me and lightly pecked my cheek made me feel like attacking a horde of titans with my bare hands just to protect her. And especially if she'd ask me to! God, I'm sound like one of the stupid lovestruck cadets!</p><p>I know that someday a portal is going to open up, and she's going through it in a blink of an eye. This hurts to think about, and I try to deny the sick feeling in my gut, but it's probably true. Why would she stay? What could I possibly offer her?</p><p>Heather's Journal: I woke up to bags being dropped on the bed next to me. Presents! Lots and lots of presents!! I admit, I definitely needed more clothing, it's not like I packed for this journey ya know? But oh my gosh, the stuff in these bags! And hahaha, me in a DRESS? That has never been done before, but I absolutely love them! This red one, it's perfect with the gold trim! and this necklace, it matches it perfectly! How did he guess my size? They fit like they were made for me! To be honest, I would wear a fucking potato sack if he gave it to me! Hahaha his reaction when I thanked him! All awkward and embarrassed and weird....LOVED it!And now I'm remembering the reason all this gift giving started. Levi in a towel!!!!!! GULP!</p><p>3 weeks later:</p><p>Entering the lab, I find Hanji deeply immersed in one of her strange and confusing experiments. "Hi Hanji!" Looking up, her eyes widen with delight.</p><p>"Heather! The cast is gone, and wow!...that dress..."</p><p>"Do I look okay?" I ask, spinning for her (and admittedly my) benefit.</p><p>"You look amazing!"</p><p>"But is it too much?" I spin around once more to give her a good look. "I feel like this is more of an evening thing...not like a fancy ball, but over the top for you know...Tuesday?"</p><p>Hanji laughs outright. "No not at all...where did you get it? That's not cheap...." Blushing, I feel like I don't know how to answer.</p><p>"Did LEVI buy that for you?"</p><p>"Don't make a big deal, I was sorely lacking in clothes as it is."</p><p>"Heather, I wouldn't make a big deal if he bought you some basic stuff....I'm willing to bet that everything he got you is just as expensive as this..."</p><p>"You're making me feel awkward."</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>"Because I don't deserve anything THAT special..." I lower my gaze, face reddening.</p><p>"Well that's not up to you to decide. Only he's going to decide your worth to him. Maybe now you can see that he really does like you, instead of making up silly excuses for his behavior."</p><p>"Hanji..."</p><p>"Heather, YES. Do you know how many silly little girl fantasies Levi has crushed, knowingly or not? To think, all this time the secret to his heart was to make him think he hates you...Poor Petra." Hanji laughs.</p><p>"Who's Petra?"</p><p>"Nevermind. The point is, he's never given anyone the time of day. Then along comes Heather. To be fair, you were pretty much forced on each other, but a lot of us saw this coming from day one and it's the best thing to happen in....forever. Levi would not buy you one dress like that, let alone however many he did buy if he didn't feel something....Are you going to tell me that necklace you're wearing that CONVENIENTLY matches that dress is just something you happened to have in your trusty backpack?"</p><p>"Nooo..."</p><p>"You make him happy, and it's a wonder to witness. Now, I know you didn't get all prettied up for me, so go find your man and make his jaw drop." Laughing, I give her a quick hug and leave.</p><p>He turns immediately at the sound of the door opening. "Hey, where have you b-" The rest of his words sit lodged in his throat, refusing to come out.</p><p>Gulping, I take a hesitant step closer. "Levi? Is something wrong?"</p><p>"No...no, everything is fine....you...you look nice."</p><p>"Really?" Feeling doubtful, I look down at the floor.</p><p>Lifting my chin to look in my eyes, he smiles. "You're utterly amazing, stop doubting. Now, do you want to take a walk with me? It's a nice night, and I'd like to get out of here for awhile."</p><p>We walk in silence for a long time, neither of us in a rush to spoil it with words. Levi finally breaks the silence, hesitantly. "Have you considered what you would do if another portal opened up?"</p><p>"I...I haven't given it any real thought....I don't think portals just open up all willy-nilly."</p><p>"So you don't think it was an accident?"</p><p>"I don't necessarily think it was on purpose either. I guess I won't know unless it happens."</p><p>"Oh." Feeling a little downcast, he says nothing more until we arrive home. "Are you coming to bed?"</p><p>"Well, my leg is better so I didn't think you'd want me hogging up your bed anymore..."</p><p>"Heather, I've been sleeping next to you for over a month now and to be honest, I sleep a little better with you next to me, so please come to bed."</p><p>"Maybe it's just psychological. It's not me per se, but more the fact of another person being there. Comforting to your subconscious. Go snuggle with Erwin, let's see how he reacts!" I say, following him to the bedroom.</p><p>Levi laughs outright at this, getting a rather hilarious image in his head. "I don't think he'd appreciate that."</p><p>As we both settle in, and Levi turns off the light I roll over towards him and he feels my hand gently touch him.</p><p>"Levi?"</p><p>"Yes?"</p><p>"If it answers your earlier question...based on how I feel right now, I don't want to be anywhere else..." Glad I can't see the ridiculously cheesy expression on his face, he pulls me close and drifts off to sleep.</p><p>Levi's Journal: She's happy. Happy with me! ME! This isn't real. I mean, how could I possibly make her happy?? I'm not that guy. I WANT to be that guy, but that's never been the case and here I am now, lying here holding her and feeling like the absolute shit! (mentally puffing out my chest) I know I'm going to fuck this up. Just watch.</p><p>Heather's Journal: I kinda want to know who this Petra girl is? was? At any rate everything Hanji said to me today made me feel rather good about things. I didn't really think about why Levi bought me all this stuff other than the practical reasons. But she's right. No guy would do that if he didn't care about a girl. I don't even want to guess at the cost of that necklace alone! And it makes me feel awkward, like I don't deserve all this. Hanji thinks otherwise. Well regardless, I always stumble back on feeling like I'm just his "chore" and I suppose it's stupid but I can't help it. Especially with how moody he's been. But I meant it when I told him I didn't want to be anywhere else. As confusing as he is to me at times, right here is where I want to be.</p>
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<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Awkward Moment</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Oh?" another step closer,smiling slightly. 'jesus Levi, cover yourself what the hell are you doing?' he thinks to himself, not bothering to listen to his own advice.</p>
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    <p>(down in Hanji's lab) "We need to be able to cook down here."</p><p>"You think?" Hanji looks up from her tinkering with a curious expression.</p><p>"Yeah! That way we can be hogs without having to go to the mess hall!"</p><p>"Nice!  We can fashion a makeshift oven/stove out of this old kiln!"</p><p>"I like the way you think! Alright, let's do this!"</p><p>A few hours later...</p><p>"Hanje, I do believe we did it!"</p><p>"Do you want to test it out?"</p><p>"Yes! I'm going to teach you how to make what may or may not pass for pizza, but we need to jet to the market. If we don't have enough ingredients there, we'll think of something else to make.  It's going to be great!"</p><p>"Well, let's go then." Heading out to the market, Hanji turns to me with a mischievous glint in her eye.</p><p>"Heather, I think a bottle of Moblit's private stock should conveniently find it's way into our possession."</p><p>"Hmmmm...I do believe you're right."</p><p>"Should we invite Levi?", Hanji asks inspecting eggs and putting them in a basket.</p><p>I sigh. "He's been really moody since we got back."</p><p>"All the more reason to invite him."</p><p>"Yeah, but I can't help to think I did something wrong..." I grab some flour adding it to the basket.</p><p>Wishing she could say more, she just gives me a sad look and says, "I'm sure that's not true, he has a tendency to get kinda dark sometimes. It'll pass."</p><p>"Are you sure?"</p><p>"Yeah", Hanji says with a glint in her eye, "Give him a kiss, he'll brighten right up!"</p><p>My eyes widen at her audacity, and my jaw drops. "Hanji!" Lightly slapping her arm, I laugh and start grabbing tomatoes. "honestly, if I wanted his foot in my face, PAINFULLY, I might just try that. I'd like to keep my teeth in my mouth, thank you."</p><p>She laughs, and we continue our shopping. "Yeah, don't tell me you two never kissed....or did he just go straight for your throat?"</p><p>"The HICKIES!" I burst out laughing. "Attack of the giant sucker fish! How funny! And yes, we have...but it was always so weird and awkward after that I don't think I could just go and kiss him like that. With his mood the way it is, I'd never know which Levi I'm getting." Feeling a little bummed, I continue inspecting the produce.</p><p>"Gosh, there's not much selection."</p><p>"You have to remember Heather, our farming is very limited."</p><p>"I guess...hey, what if we were to grow our own stuff? We could do it right on the roof."</p><p>"Really?"</p><p>"Back home, we had rooftop gardens in bigger cities. A lot of the food we grew there was used to feed the poor and the homeless, but we could do this here too."</p><p>"I'd be willing to do it. Get it planned out, we'll go from there."</p><p>"Alright, in the meantime...ah yes, garlic and onions." Putting both in the basket, I look around and spot the meat vendor. We pay for what we have and head over. Just before we reach the stall, A voice sounds behind us.</p><p>"Nile, I'm thinking this would look very nice on my arm tonight." I feel a hand brushing lightly up my arm, and the distinct scent of booze wafts over me. Turning, I see two of the Military Police standing there.</p><p>"I've never seen the likes of you before", the leering gentleman says moving in closer. "What's your name?"</p><p>Hanji pushes her way in between us. "Dennis, don't be ridiculous. Heather's been here since Wall Rose fell, she's a good friend of mine, and I know you've seen her around before.", she lies.</p><p>"I don't believe...ah wait. Wasn't she out strolling the walls with Captain Levi?"</p><p>"Yes, so I suggest you turn your attention elsewhere." We turn to go, but he grabs my arm again.</p><p>"Are you sure we've seen each other before that?" I yank my arm from his grip and turn to face him.</p><p>"I was rather shy when I first got here. And uninterested in meeting anyone new."</p><p>"Oh really?"</p><p>I move closer. "I'm not shy anymore", I tell him with a sweet smile, "But I'm still uninterested."</p><p>Hanji laughs, and with that I turn and walk away.</p><p>"He's going to die on one of his stupid missions to kill titans, and then what? You could have the easy life in the inner walls."</p><p>"If I wanted the easy life, I would have found better than you already." He takes a step forward, angry at the insult.</p><p>"Let it go" I hear Nile say, and they walk away.</p><p>"My god Hanji, that was revolting!"</p><p>"Well you handled it perfectly."</p><p>"Levi will be angry if he hears about this, him and Erwin are determined that the military police not know about me at all."</p><p>"Actually Heather, if Levi did hear about this I think the fact that Dennis put his hands on you would be what would bother him the most."</p><p>"I doubt it Hanji. He'd yell at me for being out in public."</p><p>"He'd toss Dennis over the wall and not look back. He's very protective of you, everyone knows this."</p><p>"Only because he has to be."</p><p>"Oh Heather..." She starts, but doesn't say anymore. We conclude our shopping and head back.</p><p>"Why don't you tell Levi, offer an invite. What should i do with all of this."</p><p>"Go down to the mess hall. We need salt, basil, oregano and pepper. Oh! We forgot cheese! Grab some!"</p><p>"On it!" She gives a little wave and heads in the other direction. I head up the stairs, a knot of worry growing in my stomach. 'why has he been so cold lately? am i wasting my time coming up right now? what if he's in a bad mood?' Well, there's nothing for it now, I've arrived at his door.</p><p>I walk in and call his name. No answer. I turn to walk up to his room, and at that moment he comes out of the bathroom. Drying the back of his head with a towel, he turns towards me and 'Oh god, heather, look away'. Poor advice to myself, as this is the exact opposite of what I do. "Uh...uh..Levi..."</p><p>"What are you doing back so early? I thought you were with Hanji." Red faced, I stand there unable to speak. </p><p>Sarcastically, Levi comments "I wouldn't have expected my 'tiny dick' to garner this much attention", and takes a step forward, but his confidence is betrayed by a slight tremor in his hands and voice.</p><p>I finally find my voice. "Hey you deserved those words. But let me take this moment to take them back.", I say looking pointedly down.</p><p>"Oh?" another step closer,smiling slightly. 'jesus Levi, cover yourself what the hell are you doing?' he thinks to himself, not bothering to listen to his own advice.</p><p>'I feel like he's trying to make me uncomfortable on purpose. ugh, are you kidding? fine, two can play this.' "Yes, Levi. It's actually quite intimidating." He stops, eyes wide and face red.</p><p>'there. that aught to do it.' "Anyway, Hanji and I are downstairs in the lab. Food...Moblits private stock...you should join us." I turn quickly and make my way to the door.</p><p>"How'd you get a hold of the drink?"</p><p>"We have our ways..." I state mysteriously, and hurry out the door. 'Holy shit, that was embarrassing!' Heading back down to meet up with Hanji, I try my damndest to collect myself so she doesn't notice anything amiss.</p><p>"Is he coming?" Hanji asks as I walk in.</p><p>"I don't know, I didn't wait around for an answer. What about the drink? How are we going to get a hold of it?"</p><p>Hanji grins, and says "Follow me." We sneak up the stairs at the back of the research area. "Right here.", she whispers and proceeds to unlock the door. Sneaking in as quietly as possible, we try to find our way to the kitchen.</p><p>"It's pitch fucking dark!", I whisper "Do you know where we're going?"</p><p>"Shhh, we're almost there." She trips, "oof!" and I bump into her. "shhh!" We both start giggling like trolls, trying very hard to keep silent as we make our way to the cupboard. "Here we..ahh! Got it!"</p><p>"Let's get out of here!" We make our way quickly to the door, and immediately upon exiting burst into hysterics. Dashing madly, we enter the lab area and collapse panting, small bursts of laughter erupting from time to time.</p><p>"Alright, let's start cooking."</p><p>MEANWHILE:</p><p>Levi sits, now fully dressed; working on paperwork. He can't focus on it however, all he really wants to think about is what happened about a half an hour ago. "You handled that poorly, Levi." He speaks into the empty room. "You should have covered yourself. Hell, you don't live alone anymore. You shouldn't have been walking around naked in the first place." He can't suppress a small sense of satisfaction, though. "The look on her face was priceless, though. Didn't mind that one bit. " he smiles to himself, and stands up. 'I guess I can head down and see what those two crazies are up to'.</p>
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<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Dennis</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>'And why did that piss me off so badly? Dennis? Seriously? He couldn't have her if he was the last man on earth.'</p>
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    <p>(Ridiculous fancy voices greet him as he enters) "Now you must mince the garlic finely."</p><p>"Fiiiinely you say??"</p><p>"Yes, quite good lady." Hysterical giggling follows.</p><p>He rolls his eyes. 'what the fuck? smells good, whatever is going on...' he stops around the corner to listen.</p><p>"Do you think he's coming?"</p><p>"I hope so...I don't want to deal with a drunk depressed Heather."</p><p>"Hey!"</p><p>"If he doesn't, we'll just bring our drunk obnoxious asses to him!"</p><p>"I still wish I knew what I did to garner all this mood swingy behavior...."</p><p>"You didn't do shit. Levi is a mood ALL the time. I'd think you'd be used to it by now."</p><p>"Well yeah...the moodiness makes sense I get, this doesn't."</p><p>"i tried to give you my 10 cents on this at earlier. Now, what do I do next?"</p><p>"Just throw the cheese we shredded over the top of it all...there. It can go in the oven now."</p><p>"This looks like it's going to be delicious."</p><p>"Damn straight! I only wish we had more toppings! This is nothing like a real pizza, but it is going to be good!" Our voices lower, so he enters the room.</p><p>"Heather, look. Levi decided to grace us with his presence!"</p><p>"Oh?" I turn to look at him, face red and feeling slightly awkward. By the look he's giving me, the awkwardness is very mutual.</p><p>"Hey, I'm glad you're here." I take a step closer. Trying not to be nervous at the very neutral expression on his face. He stares at me a moment longer, before his eyes soften, and he gives a small smile. He reaches out and takes my fingers gently in his hand.</p><p>"I'm sorry about earlier, I made you uncomfortable."</p><p>I giggle. "Maybe a little...but for the record Levi, not bad" I wink, and go to sit at the table where Hanji was waiting and eyeing us with curiosity.</p><p>Heart swelling up impossibly, Levi makes his way to join us. Blushing, he takes the chair beside me. Hanji passes us each a cup and pours out.</p><p>"To Heather", she says raising her glass, "For bringing the fun!"</p><p>Levi smiles. "To Heather." We drink...</p><p>"Holy shit!", I choke and gasp out the words, "I think he pissed in this!"</p><p>Giggling like mad, Hanji adds "Moblit piss." Both of us dying with laughter, Hanji pours out more. Levi just rolls his eyes.</p><p>I raise my glass. "To Levi, for being my favorite pain in the ass!" He rolls his eyes, but grins nonetheless.</p><p>"To Levi!" Hanji says and we all drink again. COUGH!</p><p>"Whooo. That shit could kill a titan!" I say.</p><p>"Maybe we should bring some on our next expedition", Levi says and we all laugh.</p><p>Levi presents the next toast. "To Hanji. For helping get Heather's car up and moving again."</p><p>"HANJI!!!!!", I shout tossing back another round....</p><p>TWO HOURS LATER:</p><p>"Ahh...pizza", Hanji says, head on table and staring at the piece she was currently holding.</p><p>Levi rolls his eyes. "You're drunk."</p><p>"Not yet, but I'm working on it."</p><p>"Alright, everytime Levi rolls his damn eyes, EVERYONE has to drink."</p><p>"Oh god,", Hanji groans, "We are going to die." We burst into laughter, and Levi rolls his eyes..</p><p>"DRINK!" I yell, laughing my ass off.</p><p>"So where did you get all the stuff to make this?"</p><p>"We went to the market.", Hanji says. I shoot her an alarmed glance. He looks at both of us, his irritation apparent in the set of his jaw.</p><p>"You WHAT?", he asks through gritting teeth.</p><p>"Oh relax Levi, everything was fine. We bumped into Nile and Dennis, but Heather handled it amazingly!"</p><p>"It's NOT okay. Tell me what happened." Hanji happily obliges, detailing our adventure to Levi, while I'm sitting back thinking of creative ways to kill her.</p><p>'dammit, look at his face. I knew it, he's furious. He's just pissed because I'm not hiding away like a good little girl. Nothing personal, so quit feeling like you betrayed his trust by wanting a little freedom'. Looking over at him, I can see I'm wrong in my assessment. He's furious, all right. But it's not directed at me at all. As soon as Hanji gets to Dennis' involvement, I'm starting to feel a bit scared, and slightly sorry for the sad pathetic ass that was dumb enough to hit on me. Should this display of emotion make me happy? Special? All I feel right now is uncomfortable. He glances over at me and seeing my expression, his gaze softens. He sighs, reaches out and takes my hand.</p><p>"Should we go back to our place now?", he asks. OUR PLACE???...OUR PLACE??? Blushing and unable to respond, I just nod.</p><p>"Goodnight you two", Hanji calls with a wave.</p><p>"Night", is all I can manage to squeak out.</p><p>He says nothing until we are inside. Closing the door, he turns to me, and gives me a sad look. I look at him confused, not understanding what he's expecting from me. He sighs, walks over to my radio and turns it on. He then walks back to me, and leads me over to sit on the couch. He reaches out stroking the hair from my face and tucking it behind my ear,  then pulls back immediately as if unsure of his own actions.</p><p>"Look, if you want to go somewhere, please tell me. I will escort you."</p><p>"Explain to me why this is such a big deal."</p><p>"These are my orders. You and your car would be both locked up, and I can't guarantee your safety. The whole military garrison smells of short-sighted fear. We are only trying to keep you safe."</p><p>"Why? Why is that so important to you?"</p><p>"Erwin said..."</p><p>"No. I said you. Why is this so important to you. I don't give a flying fuck about your orders right now, Levi.", my voice softens. "Why."</p><p>He looks away for a moment, as if gathering his thoughts. When he looks back, his gaze is sad. Cupping my face in his hands he leans closer. He rests his forehead on mine for a moment, then releases me. Standing up and walking to his bedroom, he looks over his shoulder. "Come to bed, Heather."</p><p>LATER THAT NIGHT:</p><p>'We have to figure something out', he thinks to himself. 'some way she can be here, and her car as well without raising suspicion. How? I don't want to see her miserable, but I can't let her just wander either.' He chuckles softly. 'don't want to see her miserable? it was only a couple of months ago i couldn't stand her. But is that even really true? Fuck, I think she had me from day one. Hanji was right all along.'</p><p>'And why did that piss me off so badly? Dennis? Seriously? He couldn't have her if he was the last man on earth.' Thinking about it is causing the rage to resurface, and he gets up fists clenched, walking into the living room. I'm asleep, curled in a little ball on my side. He grins, and sits on the edge of the couch. Watching me, he feels the calm slowly overtake him, and he sits that way for awhile; afraid if he lies back down, the thoughts will come crowding back into his mind. Knowing he definitely doesn't want me to catch him sitting there, he reluctantly gets up and heads back to his room. 'why did she come out here to sleep? Did I upset her?'</p><p>He gets dressed, and quietly leaves. Heading through the city, he approaches the garrison. 'I'm getting angry again. Shit, let's get this over with.' Entering, the first person he meets is Nile. Startled by the late night visit, Nile jumps to his feet.</p><p>"Captain Levi, how can I help you?"</p><p>"Dennis.", Levi says without breaking stride.</p><p>"Captain?"</p><p>"Dennis. Where is he?"</p><p>"Up on the wall." Continuing on, he follows three flights of stairs, and exits out the door that leads to the walls. He finds Dennis easily enough. Hell, just follow the drunken laughter. Dennis turns around and spotting Levi coming towards him, he stands up and grins.</p><p>"Captain, care for a dri..." His words are choked off as Levi grabs him by the throat and continues walking; dragging a stumbling, gagging Dennis behind him. At the edge of the wall, Levi stops and hauls Dennis over the side, and holding him over the precipice, back against the wall he speaks directly into Dennis' ear.</p><p>"Heard you met my lady friend today." Dennis tries to choke out an answer.</p><p>"No, don't speak. Listen. I will fucking kill you. I will make sure there is nothing left to return to your family, if you so much as utter her name again. Do..you..understand?"</p><p>Dennis tries ineffectively to speak, and Levi hauls him back onto the ledge. "I'm glad we understand each other." He says, shoving Dennis onto his ass and then turning to walk away. 'that was stupid Levi. Now that the whole garrison witnessed this, people WILL be talking. I need to think of something fast....why did I let my emotions get the better of me?'</p><p>Sneaking in quietly, so as not to wake me Levi tiptoes over to the couch. 'Did she go back to bed?' Opening the bedroom door as quietly as possible, he peeks in. I'm sprawled out sound asleep. Going back to the living room, he sits on the couch and buries his face in his hands. 'how am I going to fix this? god Levi, think!' Hearing scratching at the window, he looks up. Sighing, he opens the window and carries the annoying furball to the couch. "Well? Do you have any bright ideas, kitty? No? Thought as much." 'maybe if I distract my mind with something else...' Reaching over to my backpack, he pulls out my journal from the inside pocket.......'crusty old Levi??' shocked by the burst of laughter this particular journal evokes, Levi claps his hand over his mouth guiltily and looks to the bedroom door. After a moment he relaxes and continues his reading, chuckling quietly at random from time to time. 'where's my dentures......oh Heather.....'</p><p>15 minutes later, he hears a yawn, and the bedsprings creak. 'shit! she's up!' Leaping up to put the journal away, his foot tangles into something soft and he goes flying forward banging his nose on the arm of the couch. The annoying furball screeches, and Levi sees stars.</p><p>"Levi?" Heather calls from the bedroom. Hurriedly, Levi places the book back where it belongs and tries to zip the backpack closed before I come out. 'fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!' Standing up just as I come out, he breathes a sigh of relief.</p><p>"Levi, what happened? And you're bleeding..." Going into the kitchen, I grab a rag and start running it under cold water.</p><p>"Heather, I'm fine...I tripped over kitty and hit my face is all...."</p><p>"I thought Levi wasn't supposed to be inside?"</p><p>"I know, I let him in."</p><p>"So can he stay?"</p><p>Levi sighs. "Tomorrow. After you get a box for it to shit in. BUT... if he shits anywhere else, he's gone."</p><p>I smile, delighted. "Come sit down and let me get you cleaned up."</p><p>"I can take care of myself, Heather."</p><p>"Levi, shut up." I say dabbing at his swelling nose. "I think it might be sprained Levi."</p><p>'great. thanks a lot you annoying furball....at least one good thing came of tonight I might have an idea to keep her here with me...and I would LOVE to know what the sexy dream was about....' Grinning at the thought, Levi turns his attention to me.</p><p>"I might have an idea, to get you citizenship..."</p><p>"Really? No more hiding from the MP's?"</p><p>"No more hiding." I give him a hug, and he pulls me down onto the couch. "Let me talk to Erwin first, and if it sounds like it will hold up...i'll let you in on it."</p><p>Levi's Journal: Fucking Dennis. It's alarming how infuriating it was to hear that piece of shit was coming on to (my) Heather. What stake do I really have on her anyway? I'm too chickenshit to seal the deal. Because she has feelings for me too, THAT'S my stake and why can't she just make the first move??? Why does it have to be me??!! I WILL fucking wreck that man if he EVER tries anything again. I know it's stupid, what chance would he ever have with her? Then again, I thought the same thing about myself once!</p><p>To further make the tension unbearable, she saw me naked and like a dumbass I just stood there letting her look. Why didn't I cover up? Instead I kept trying to get closer to her like....what? Maybe something would have finally happened between us? Like my nakedness would have served as some kind of magic charm? Dumb Levi. "Abracadabra, i'm naked! For my next amazing trick you will helplessly throw yourself at me!...Ta-Da!" Can I just die in a hole?</p><p>I've got an idea to keep her here and all it took was me spraining my nose trying to put away her journal to come up with it. </p><p>What sexy dream, I wonder.......GOD I WANT TO KNOW SO FUCKING BAD!</p><p>Heathers Journal: I gave Hanji a cooking lesson today, but first a trip to the market which was super fun, and only marred by the disgusting MP that we bumped into. Ew! Dude made my skin crawl! Remember how I felt about Levi in the beginning? Multiply that by 100 and you've got Dennis. EW!</p><p>So I go up to invite him to join us, and never mind Levi in a towel....try Levi WITHOUT a towel! Oh my, I think my ovaries exploded. But he was (as usual lately) acting weird. Like he wanted to be an irritable fuck, but also didn't and why was he walking around like that anyway????!!! At any rate, he just stood there and didn't bother to cover himself. I wish he would have done something other than stare at me. Cover up maybe? Jump on me? There I said it. I would not have minded a bit.....help!</p><p>And then! Hanj goes ahead and tells him all about our adventure in the marketplace, and I'm glad I'm not a certain MP named Dennis!! I honestly thought he was going to rip into me too, but he was actually pretty calm. Whatever the hell he's feeling lately, I just wish he'd come out with it, am I supposed to guess everything?</p><p>But Kitty Levi gets to stay, so he must give somewhat of a crap for me right? What guy would bust his nose open thanks to a small ball of fur and be all "it's cool, he can stay". Yeah, it's definitely not just me. I just wish he'd do something about it already!!</p>
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<a name="section0028"><h2>28. Time for Us</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Hey", I respond back, smiling. "Levi, what are we doing here?"</p><p>"Getting away from everyone." he says, gently kissing my lips.</p><p>"How did you get Erwin to agree to this, anyway?"</p><p>"Wasn't too hard, I just told him how I feel about you...." Before I can respond, he kisses me deeply. As he rolls over on top of me, I wrap my arms around him, kissing him back.</p>
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    <p>"You were a merchant in the undergound, that's how we met."</p><p>"Okay..."</p><p>"We had re-acquainted after the fall of wall rose, and I brought you up here with the intention of purchasing full-time citizenship. You then decided you wished to join Hanji's engineering squad, where you and Hanji came up with a plan for a new mechanized anti-titan weapon."</p><p>"But Levi, what if guards are questioned? What if they say they never saw us exit the underground together?"</p><p>"Don't worry about that. Just remember what we discussed, and you will do fine." At that moment, Hanji and Erwin walk up, carrying large stacks of papers.</p><p>"Hi! Alright, I have my blueprints of your car, and Erwin has your paperwork inducting you into our ranks. We should be set."</p><p>"Are you guys sure about this?"</p><p>Erwin glances at Levi, smiles and nods. "We are ready."</p><p>"My Lord", a puffed out gentleman in ridiculously fancy clothes announced, "Presenting Commander Erwin, Captain Levi and Section Commander Hanji."</p><p>"Step forward and state your business." Erwin nods to Levi, and he steps forward. Motioning to me, I step beside him.</p><p>"My Lord, I am petitioning for full-time citizenship for my Lady, Heather." I lower my gaze respectfully, and Levi continues. "I confess, that she has been living with me since the fall of wall rose, and am willing to pay whatever fine is due to me for not utilizing the proper channels sooner."</p><p>"For what reason are you now requesting citizenship?"</p><p>The gentlemen in the audience chambers chuckle knowingly. Levi takes a moment to look each in the eyes before continuing.</p><p>"Any 'gentlemen' in the crowd right now who might be insinuating anything improper regarding my lady friend, can meet me outside at the conclusion of this meeting. I will be happy to teach you some manners. As to your question; My Lord, since bringing her to the surface, Heather has come up with many useful suggestions for improving our scouting methods. One which, is outlined in these notes presented by Section Commander Hanji."</p><p>At that moment Hanji steps forward and presents her blueprints to the court. They take a moment to read through them, and then look to me.</p><p>"What exactly, my lady are we looking at?" I look at Levi, and he nods encouragingly.</p><p>"My lords, what we have here is an armored titan killing weapon, able to travel distances faster and farther than horseback. These armored weapons are able to house up to 5 ODM troops onto the battlefield, and have weaponry of their own to combat titans."</p><p>"Pixis likes", comes a call from the crowd and laughter and scattered applause follows. When the uproar dies down the conversation continues.</p><p>"And how does this machine operate?"</p><p>"A concoction developed by Section Commander Hanji and I, and operable by a trained soldier."</p><p>"And what soldiers would be trained to operate such machinery?"</p><p>"As of now, we have one prototype. I am it's driver, and only me."</p><p>"You are not within the ranks of the scouting legion."</p><p>"Be that as it may, I am the only one who operates this machinery.  If more were to be made I would be happy to train any willing." Erwin clears his throat.</p><p>"My Lord, if I may...?"</p><p>"Proceed."</p><p>"Heather has officially been inducted into our ranks, and assigned; by me, to Section Commander Hanji's engineers.. Her forward thinking and creativity would be a great boon to the survey corps." Stepping forward he presents all the necessary documents.</p><p>"So this 'prototype' has already been tested?"</p><p>"Yes, and successfully."</p><p>"We will recess for 15 minutes. leave us to our deliberations."</p><p>Exiting the throne room, I breathe a huge sigh of relief. "I'm so nervous! Gods!" Crossing my arms and rubbing away the gooseflesh that has formed there, I turn to Levi. "Well? What do you think?" Placing his hand on the small of my back, he leads me to a nearby bench to sit.</p><p>"You did well. Don't worry. even if they deny your petition, we'll think of something. We can always have you stay permanently at the old scouting garrison. Don't worry, Erwin is in there defending our case." He looks kind of depressed at the prospect of moving me, but before I can question him, Hanji comes over.</p><p>"They're calling us back already." I give Levi a panicked look, and he gives my hand a reassuring squeeze before leading me back into the throne room.</p><p>"Upon discussing the matter presented, we will be granting the lady Heather full citizenship aboveground. Welcome." I breathe a sigh of relief.</p><p>"Captain Levi, though your intentions were undoubtedly good, you still showed poor judgement in not presenting the lady's case sooner. 1,000 coin will be your fine."</p><p>"Levi, that's so much!", I whisper.</p><p>"Don't worry, Heather...it's covered." '1000 coin is a small price to pay', he thinks. 'look how happy she is right now'. He glances sideways, taking in my smile and wide eyed gaze as if I was just actually looking at my surroundings for the first time. "Let's do something special tonight....you know, to celebrate."</p><p>Excited at the prospect, I ask, "Like what? Hey, I've got an idea! Maybe we can go to the military police garrison and heave Dennis over the wall!" Looking alarmed, Levi starts to stammer out a response before seeing the mischief in my eyes.</p><p>"You heard about that?" He stops walking.</p><p>"I did. I only wish I saw it.", I say, giving him a peck on the cheek before continuing to walk home. Blushing, and realizing he's being left behind he hurries to catch up.</p><p>10 minutes later:</p><p>"Hanji! Oi!"</p><p>"Yes?" Comes her distracted response from the back of the lab.</p><p>"I want to do something special for Heather tonight...any ideas?" Poking her head up from behind a large stack of supplies, Hanji grins.</p><p>"How 'special' are we talking?" Rolling his eyes, levi walks over to where she is, and grabs hold of one end of the crate she is trying to move.</p><p>"Funny. Seriously, though..."</p><p>"Well...oof, that was heavy. How about maybe going on a night expedition? Just the two of you....the moonlight....a cozy blanket for two....titans....ah romance!"</p><p>Glaring, Levi sighs and walks back over to the pile, grabbing another box. "Why did I bother asking you?"</p><p>"Because I give you amazing advice, and you know it."</p><p>"Not this time, apparently."</p><p>"Look, maybe you should ask yourself exactly why it is so important to you to do this, and maybe you can figure it out for yourself, seeing my advice is SO lame."</p><p>He sighs, sets down the last box and plops into the chair next to the stack. "I suppose we could go to the cave..."</p><p>"Break her other ankle?", Hanji giggles.</p><p>"No! Don't be an ass! Gods, forget it Hanji." He walks out with a wave and heads to his own quarters. 'our quarters', he thinks blushing madly. 'gods, what's wrong with me'? Entering 'our' quarters, he sees me sound asleep on the couch. Chuckling to himself, he goes for a shower, and changes clothes. Coming into the living room, he sits on the couch and gives me a light shake,</p><p>"Heather...hey, wake up." I yawn, roll over onto my back, stretch then proceed to roll right back over flopping my arm over his lap. 'Oh for heavens sake.', he thinks shaking me again.</p><p>"Heather." A little louder this time.</p><p>"Huh?"</p><p>"About time. Come on get up."</p><p>"Move your ass and I will", I mutter shoving at him with the heel of my hand. He stands up, waiting for me to follow suit.</p><p>"All right, Levi what's this about?"</p><p>"Just come on." Guiding me to the walls, we stop at the stalls and he saddles Nugget.</p><p>"Levi, where are we going?"</p><p>"Just get on." I climb up behind him, and as the gates open we head out into the night. We ride in silence, and I begin to recognize some landmarks,</p><p>'are we going back to the mountains?', I think to myself. 'I wonder what this is all about." It's almost dawn before we arrive, and I'm exhausted. Arriving at the cave, Levi pulls out the bedroll, and guides me over.</p><p>"We should catch a nap." He says, pulling me down next to him. A little shocked and unsure about what the hell is going on, I freeze up poker-stiff.</p><p>"Heather." he says, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close. "Come here, please." I relax, allowing my head to rest on his chest. I go to sleep with the feeling of his hands gently stroking my hair....</p><p>I open my eyes to see him lying over the top of me, propped on his elbow watching me. "Hey.", he says reaching out and stroking my face.</p><p>"Hey", I respond back, smiling. "Levi, what are we doing here?"</p><p>"Getting away from everyone." he says, gently kissing my lips.</p><p>"How did you get Erwin to agree to this, anyway?"</p><p>"Wasn't too hard, I just told him how I feel about you...." Before I can respond, he kisses me deeply. As he rolls over on top of me, I wrap my arms around him, kissing him back.</p><p>A couple hours Later:</p><p>I wake to the smell of food cooking. A fire has been started towards the back of the cave with a pot hanging over the top of it. Realizing how hungry I am, I sit up looking for any sign of my clothes.</p><p>"Pants...pants...pants, everyone needs pants...."</p><p>"You don't need pants."</p><p>I look up at the sound of his voice. Standing at the cave entrance, he's naked, his back to me. "I want you to be happy, Heather. Whatever that means for you. Do you understand?" The set of his shoulders contradicting the casualness of his tone.</p><p>I get up, wrapping a blanket around me and join him. "I am, and I hope the same for you."......</p><p>He glances at me, smiling and takes my hand. "More than you know, Heather." He sighs, and it seems as if a big burden has been lifted.</p>
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<a name="section0029"><h2>29. Decision</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Smiling, he thinks to himself, 'If I believed in omens, I'd say this is one..." Reaching into his pocket, his hand grips a small box nestled inside.....</p>
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    <p>Six Months Later....</p><p>Resting his back against mine, Levi looks up at the slow moving clouds. "This is perfect. Like really good tea, perfect."</p><p>"Cool mountain breeze on my face, perfect."</p><p>He looks back at me. "Being with you, perfect."</p><p>"Neck kisses perfect."</p><p>"Seriously Heather? That was the best you could come up with?"</p><p>"Hey! You said tea. And besides, neck kisses are very nice..."</p><p>"Well why haven't I got any? I gave YOU neck kisses..."</p><p>Laughing, I shove him away. "You assaulted me, dimwit!"</p><p>"You assaulted me back woman, so that negates any implied assault on my part." Grabbing me by the waist, he scoops me into his arms.</p><p>"Levi", I squeal trying to wriggle away."Stop tickling me!!" Relaxing together, I sigh. "This is perfect, though. Like being in the arms of the man I love, perfect."</p><p>He looks at me in mock surprise. "Oh...oh my, this is embarrassing. What am I doing here? Allow me to go get Dennis for you..." He starts to sit up, and laughing; I pull him back down.</p><p>"Very funny Levi." I say, kissing his neck.</p><p>"You keep that up woman, the day is going to get much more perfect..."</p><p>"Oh really...." leaving small kisses down his neck.</p><p>Grinning, he scoops me closer, throwing the blanket over top of us...</p><p>One hour later: "Hey Levi, that cloud looks like two rings intertwined."</p><p>Smiling, he thinks to himself, 'If I believed in omens, I'd say this is one..." Reaching into his pocket, his hand grips a small box nestled inside.....</p><p>Lightning in the distance. Loud booming thunder.</p><p>"Levi! Look! I think another portal is opening!"</p><p>'no! not now!' he thinks, panic gripping him.</p><p>"It looks like it's over the old garrison, come on!" I head down towards where we left Nugget, but stop once I realize he's not following.</p><p>"Levi?" Staring at the flashes of light off in the distance, Levi feels frozen.</p><p>'is she leaving me? this isn't happening...'</p><p>'no, levi; you told her you wanted her to be happy no matter what that means, i just hoped that meant with me...' sighing, and feeling the hot sting of tears behind his eyes he slowly makes his way towards her. Arriving, they're greeted with several armored cars, the driver's of which are standing at attention facing a very displeased Hanji.</p><p>"Captain...." I greet the soldier in the forefront.</p><p>"Sergeant...I apologize for the delay. Tracking you was no easy feat." Levi steps forward and takes my hand. The Captain, gives him a dismissive glance and continues to address me.</p><p>'this guy is massive, even bigger than reiner I think, and he's just covered in tattoos, Heather has a few, but this guy is covered.' looking from one to the other Levi gets a sinking feeling in his stomach. 'there's more than a professional relationship here...or was, at one time.' feeling disheartened by this revelation, Levi turns his attention back to the conversation.</p><p>"This can only go one of two ways Heather, you know this."</p><p>"I know." I turn to Levi, and squeeze his hand for a moment before letting go. I walk slowly towards the line of cars, my heart thudding with every step.</p><p>Clutching tightly to the rings in his pocket like life support, Levi watches me walk away. 'no...heather, please...I just fucking found you...'</p><p>'why can't I say any of this out loud? I feel like i'm paralyzed...she's leaving....'</p><p>'wait...what's happening?'</p><p>Standing before my old comrades, I feel the weight of the decision I'm about to make. I'm giving up something that I thought was so important to me. Reaching out with a trembling hand, I place my keys in my former Captain's hand.</p><p>"Are you sure?"</p><p>"I am."</p><p>"And he's worth this?"</p><p>"He is." The Captain turns away without another word, signalling his soldiers to follow. Getting into what was my car, he looks at me one last time.</p><p>"Last chance." I shake my head. He sighs, starts my car and heads for the portal. I turn and walk back to Levi. Saying nothing, I wrap my arms around him. Stunned by the turn of events, Levi wraps his arms around me as well, and we stay that way for a very long time......</p>
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<a name="section0030"><h2>30. Epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Heathers Journal: I haven't been feeling well. This isn't like before though, it's different. I had Hanj run another blood test, and it turns out I'm pregnant...... He proposed to me in his awkwardly adorable way just after my old life disappeared through a closing portal. I can't wait to tell him what this new life holds....</p><p>                                                                                            The End</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This story started out as a strange dream that continued on in a somewhat linear fashion over a succession of nights. This is a large part of what made me decide to turn it into a fanfiction. (Hence, the first person narrative)<br/>I've read a lot of fanfiction regarding Levi, and enjoyed them all. I especially enjoy the one's that take him out of his comfort zone. That is the whole point, right? I notice a lot of comments from readers of these stories who say things like "Levi would never do that" or "Levi would beat your ass for that" The point is, you DON'T know any better than I or anyone else really, what he would do. The only one truly with that power is his creator. So relax, enjoy these good stories and let them be just that. A story. In one point in my story, Levi punches me in the face. After that, no matter how frustrated he is, he never strikes me. Why? A lot of readers and writers alike tend to place him in the solve it with my fists category without exploring any other possibilities. Personally, I think a lot of that has to do with his feelings for his mother. I honestly don't think he would ever bring himself to strike a woman. That's just my opinion, based off the fun I had using him as my signature assignment project for my Psch 101 class last year. I know, some would think of what happened with Annie, but that was a different set of rules all together. She's a titan. She's killed soldiers. She took off with Eren.</p><p>In this story, you have a headstrong woman that he has been charged with protecting. She's on the defensive and he gets the brunt of it. Still, he doesn't strike her. He's faced with an annoying shit that drives him bonkers, yet although he doesn't want to admit it appeals to him for that very reason. She doesn't take his shit. How refreshing that must be.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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